Cullen Home for Unwed Mothers
by Insert Fangs Here
Summary: Bella Swan is looking forward to going to college, when she is raped and left for dead. She is sent away when her parents find out about her pregnancy. She meets Dr. Edward Cullen who  has come to help his mother. Can Love truly Heal? Human/rape/language
1. Chapter 1  Stolen innocence

Chapter one

" Bella, What are we going to do, It's too late to have it taken care of. "

I looked at my mother Renee, her eyes were swollen and red. We have spent a better part the day crying, She was crying cause I have disappointed her. I was a good girl. I didn't experiment with drugs when all my friends did. I was always home before curfew. I was an A student well on her way to a full scholarship to Dartmouth College. I was crying cause in one night I destroyed everything I worked for , My chance at College, my families love and respect for me. I in a way lost the respect for myself. I would now become no more then a small town scandal.

" Mom, I am so sorry. I never meant this to happen. I don't know what we are going to do"

" I hope you aren't thinking about keeping the thing. That is not up for discussion"

" Mom, The doctor says I'm too far along for an abortion"

"Isabella, You have your whole life ahead of you, We won't let this inconvenience hinder everything you're destined for!"

" What are you saying?"

" You are going to give it up for adoption, no questions asked, Go to your room, I still have to break the news to your father, Charlie is going to go ballistic"

"Yes, Mom"

IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS….IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS..

I never went out with my friends , not in a social setting. I didn't go to parties on the weekends. I didn't go to football games. I was never a cheerleader, hell I wasn't even in the marching band. I had two friends Angela, She was a bit of a nerd like I am, but she was in the band. She met the love of her life during our freshman year Ben. They had their life mapped out from the start. College. Marriage, kids, and happily ever after. My best friend in the whole wide world was Lauren. My parents didn't like her. She was the wild one. She drank, smoked and was very active when it came to sex. I had known her since first grade. She was the wild one. I loved her dearly. I think in some ways I lived vicariously threw her. She told me how it felt to do those things.

Our senior prom was held in May, This would be my first night on my own without parents. The first time I was going to actually feel like a teenager . I was set to graduate the next month and I was to leave for Dartmouth in the fall. That was part of the plan.

Prom for the most part was a wonderful experience. Lauren's dad rented a limo so that we would have safe transportation to and from. They weren't naïve in thinking their daughter would remain sober. I decided to go with Jacob Black. He was a family friend of ours and the only one who my parents trusted to take me to prom. I felt a bit stupid having my dad arrange my date. He lived on Lapush reservation and didn't go to school with us. He was a year older then I and had graduated from school the year before. He was working at his cousin's auto garage. Lauren and Angela said it was hot that I was going with an older guy to prom.

I loved the whole pampering and getting dressed up part. It was a wonderful experience to have with my two best friends. I looked like a totally different person. I didn't look like the plain Bella. I actually considered myself beautiful. My dress was a sleeveless navy blue dress. My hair was pinned up and I had small crystals attached to some of the curls. I wore my mothers diamond studded earrings that my father had given to her on the day I was born We had danced and I enjoyed Jacob's company. He did everything possible to make my prom experience enjoyable . We were leaving when Lauren suggested we to an after party that was held by Michael Newton at his parents house. I asked Jacob if he wanted to go and he said he had to work the next day and we dropped him off at home.

There was a lot of people at Mike's. The whole student body showed up. I didn't know them well. I followed Lauren in and we walked to the table and she handed me a red cup of what she called juice. I later learned it's a combination of assorted liquors and fruit punch. It tasted really good. You could hardly tell it held any alcohol in it. Lauren had decided to mingle and I sat on the couch drinking. I've been there awhile when James Newton , Mike's older brother came to sit next to me. He was three years older then the rest of us. He was a junior at Washington state and in town to cause he was on break from finals at school.

" How have you been Isabella, Where did your date go?"

"Jacob had to go back to the reservation, He had to work tomorrow"

" I seen you walk in with Lauren, You sure have grown up a lot, turned into a very sexy woman"

" James, sexy isn't a word to describe me, you have it wrong"

" How come you never dated my brother, He's always had a crush on you"

" Well, I don't have time for a boyfriend, besides there is no one of interest to me"

"Why?"

"Because I choose to spend my time focused on my studies, I have a scholarship to College next fall and I don't need unnecessary distractions"

" so are you still a virgin?"

" That's a personal question that I don't have to answer?"

I got and immediately began to feel the effects of the 4 cups of juice I drank. I looked for over an hour to find Lauren. I noticed the limo was gone. I couldn't believe I was ditched. She would never of done this to me. I tried calling her on her cell but all I got was a voicemail. My head was cloudy and I couldn't call my parents to come get me, I had been drinking and I knew they would be furious not to mention my father was police chief and there was a house full of underage drinkers. I didn't want to get anyone in trouble.

The only person I knew that wasn't drunk was James. I didn't feel right about asking him to take me home, but I had no choice I walked back in and saw James talking to Mike. " I hate to ask you this James, but could you take me home, Lauren has left me and I have no way home, you're the only sober enough"

" sure sweetheart, I can do that, give me about ten minutes and ill meet you by my car, it's the silver Honda out front"

" okay Thanks"

Ten minutes later James come out with keys in hand and we left. I started to doze off in the front seat. I woke when I felt someone jerk me out the car. I looked and saw a very pissed off James. I looked around and noticed we were no where near my house but at the cliffs at First Beach.

" What are you doing James?"

" You've been a fucking tease all damn night bitch"

I was still foggy from drinking and I would trip as he dragged me to a clearing near the woods. I could hear the waves crashing on the beach. It used to be a sound that brought me peace. He stopped and threw me down on the ground and laid on top of me. I tried to fight him off of me, but he was much bigger and stronger them me. I wanted to yell, but I knew no one would hear me. First beach was secluded and there were no houses for at least a mile. I laid there crying and praying as he ripped my dress and tore my panties from me. The pain as he entered me was indescribable . He pushed into me hard and fast. I never imagined my first time would be like this. I had dreams of being with the man I love and he would be gentle and take care of me. He would whisper words of love as I gave him my virginity. If I had gone home when the prom was over this wouldn't be happening to me. James kisses were so hard that he busted my lip. He kept his left hand around my neck as he violated me. It seemed like it was lasting forever. But in reality James was a minute man . I was thankful. I could smell the blood flowing from my legs .

" Well I got my answer Isabella Swan is or should I say was a virgin after all"

He reached by my waist and grabbed my underwear. I watched him as he put them in his pocket. I just wanted him to leave. He got what he wanted. I felt so stupid and foolish.

" Well I will be saving these to remember you by and I'm sure you will always remember me"

I moved to sit up and leave when he punched me and everything went black.

…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS

I woke and light has started to peek threw the trees. Every part of my body hurt. I sat up and saw the dried blood on my legs. My dress was in shreds. James left me for dead. I looked beside me and found my purse. I was hoping that my cell was still in there. I turned it on an noticed I had over fifty calls from my parents and over a hundred texts. They were all saying basically the same thing _Bella call home now! , Where are you, _. I couldn't call them. This was all my fault for not listening to them. I called Jacob. He was on he way out the door to go to work.

"Hello Bella, what do I owe the pleasure of your call this morning"

" Jacob, Please help me"

"What's wrong sweet heart , where are you?"

"I was left near First Beach"

"Left?"

"Jake, I'll explain when you get here"

Five minutes later Jacob pulled up in his Chevy s-10 . I had already moved closer to the edge of the woods, where he could see me. When Jake got to me, I explained everything, he was so mad, I had never seem him so furious. I told me to never tell my parents or anyone about what had happened. He tried to protest but agreed. Jacob called my parents and let them know that I stayed over at his house with his little sister Rachel . He cleaned me up and gave me something to wear. He nursed my scrapes and bruises. He drove me home. I hidden any facial wounds with my hooded jacket and makeup . I was thankful that the weather in Forks, Washington was mild and never really hot.

I ignored everyone for the last few days of school. I didn't even speak to Angela or Lauren. I was so mad at Lauren for ditching me . Graduation was suppose to be a joyous occasion. James of course was there for his brother Mike. He kept staring at me, Looking at him made me nauseous. I told my parents I wasn't feeling well and I went home. That was the last I saw of him.

I was beginning to be sick after graduation. My mom decided to take me to the doctor after I didn't get any better after two weeks. When the doctor came back with my results , I was shocked more so my mother. I was nine weeks pregnant . The doctor started to talk about options. I told her in private that an abortion was not an option and to please tell my mother it was too late for one, even though I knew better.

I was sitting in my room when I heard a knock at the door. I braced myself for what wrath my father was going to reign down on me.

"Bella, baby we need to talk"


	2. Chapter 2 Discarded Soul

**An: I don't own Twilight. All that belongs to the wonderful SM.**

**How many of yall are excited to get our hands on eclipse at midnight on Saturday ?**

**I want to thank all of you, who have favored and alerted this story.. Love it . Everyone loves reviews and I'm so different**

Chapter 2

**Discarded soul**

Charlie was angry . I didn't blame him. The beginning of the conversation was awkward. My mother had informed him that their daughter had disgraced the family and all of the details about the Doctors visit. My mother had decided she didn't want anything to do with me. In her words, "she had washed her hands of me and my problem"

"When did this happen Isabella" Charlie has asked in a strained voice.

" Prom"

"I trusted that fucking Jacob with you, I trusted the boy!" he said as he punch the door to my closet leaving a good sized indentation.

I became frightened of my dad and I recoiled from the noise

" It wasn't Jacob, dad"

"Well who the hell was it, cause he's going to have a hard time explaining those bullets I put in his ass" Charlie's face was red with fury

I turned around and laid on the bed., with my back to him. I had no intention of telling him what happened. I blamed myself enough. I didn't want others to confirm, what I already knew. It was my own damn fault. He waited for my answer for about thirty minutes, then he left without saying another word.

Sleep didn't come easy for me that night. I was plagued with nightmares. Every time I closed my eyes all I saw was James's face. I could smell the wet leaves and soil. I could taste the peppermint in his mouth when he kissed me. The thought of smelling that again caused my stomach to revolt.

I laid in bed till about noon. I half expected one of my parents to check on me , but they never came. I walked into the kitchen and Charlie and Renee was sitting at the dinning room table, looking over some papers. I made my way to scramble me some eggs. I wasn't starving, but the doctor said I need to eat more then I would normally. It was for the baby's health. When it came to the baby, I was indifferent about it. I was not in love nor did I hate it entirely. It wasn't his or her fault that this happened. I hadn't really thought about what I was going to do. I still wanted to continue with my plans. I wasn't sure how a baby would hinder this. Renee made it very clear, that I was to give this child up for adoption. She didn't want this thing to tarnish our family's name. I knew I wasn't in a position to care for a child. I was alone in this.

I was eating my lunch by the island ,when my father called me to where he was. They were still in the dinning room. I carried my plate and sat at the opposite end of the table. Renee refused to look at me in the eye or anywhere near my direction.

Charlie took the papers from Renee . He looked at me. I could see the pain I caused in his face. It hurt me that I did that to him. I was his only child. I was his baby girl.

"Bella, we found a place that will look after you until your situation improves, They will provide medical care, and help you with the adoption process. Your scholarship to Dartmouth has been deferred a year, so you will start next fall. You will not be allowed back here until it's taken care of. We will come visit periodically "

" Where am I going?"

"You're going to Phoenix ,Arizona to The Cullen Home for unwed Mothers."

" When do I leave ?"

" I put you on a plane tomorrow at five am"

"okay, well… I understand and I'll just go pack, but I just wanted to say I never intended to disappoint you and I'm sorry"

…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS

Renee drove me to the airport, only because Charlie had to be on duty. I got out the car without any words said, not even a goodbye.

The flight was peaceful and I felt relieved getting away from Forks. I managed to get a few hours of deep sleep. I was awaken by a old lady letting me know the plane was landing. When I departed, I noticed the complete difference between Forks and Phoenix . The heat was very welcomed change. I wanted to soak up as much as I could. Immediately, I started to relax.

It wasn't long before I was met by a girl who was two inches shorter but looked to be around my age. I immediately noticed the small bump that protruded from her pink t-shirt with the words " Pregzilla" written across the front. It made me laugh"You like my shirt huh"?

"Yeah, I can say I've never seen it before"

"Hi, My name is Alice Brandon and you must be Isabella Swan" Alice held her hand out for me to shake and I accepted.

"Yea, please call me Bella"

"Well Bella, I was sent to bring you to the house, you ready?"

I grabbed my bag and got into a black Mercedes

Alice was a refreshing ball of energy She was eighteen and came to Arizona from New York. She was four months pregnant . The father had skipped out on her, parents sent her here also to keep it a secret. They were a well to do political family and her father was up for re-election to congress. I knew that Alice and I were going to become excellent friends, cause she said so and I didn't feel the need to doubt her.

IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…IMS…

The house was enormous .It was white with blue shutters. Its looked to be three stories tall. It sat on at least twenty-five acres of land. It was open and airy. A woman with dark brown hair held in a loose bun was standing on the porch. I grabbed my bag and walked toward her

"Alice , thank you for going to pick up Isabella for me."

"No problem mama Esme , I was happy to do it."

Alice put her arm around my shoulder gave it a squeeze, before she walked inside

"Isabella , welcome to Cullen house. I'm Esme or mama, sometimes both, come in to my office and we will get you settled soon"

I walked behind her and we entered a room with a dark cherry wooden desk and leather chairs . The house smelled like pine-sol. I must admit I was addicted to that smell when I was a kid. It reminded me of better times at home. She pulled out a manila folder with my name written in black marker.

" Isabella, Your file say you prefer to be called Bella, is that correct?"

"Yes, Esme"

"Okay Bella, Its also says you are seventeen and your birthday is September first . You have graduated High school. You are due February ninth and you desire the adoption for your baby, is that correct"

"Yea, That's the only choice I have isn't it?"

"Sweetheart, We always have choices."

"We are a home to help girls to make the best decision that will help them live life to the fullest. We don't judge or condemn you for your choices here. We are a close group of women. Right now you are here with four other ladies. We have the capacity to hold fifteen. You will be expected to be medically reviewed every week., help out in chores and attended therapy

"why do I have to attend therapy?"

"Because being a single mother is an enormous hardship. There are not only physical changes that you are dealing with but emotional ones as well, We also have a group session also, so that you may get to know the other ladies and air out any concerns that you may have"

"um…okay"

" I know you are scared, but I assure you this place is incredibly safe and we have ample security here, We will do everything to make your adjustment to Cullen house run as smoothly as possible. We have breakfast at eight am ,Lunch is at noon and Dinner will be served at seven. We serve snacks throughout the day. If you have any cravings please let our Chef Mrs. Cope know and she will accommodate you. Your bedroom is expected to be cleaned once a week. You will have your own suite. They all come with a queen-size bed and Jacuzzi tub. There are emergency buttons in both in case something happens. It alerts medical staff and security , Do you have any questions for me?"

"No, I think you have covered everything thank you"

"Okay, Bella lets get you settled, We have group in an hour"

Esme came off as very motherly , but my guard was up naturally. She did make me feel safe and cared for. I would give place a chance and see where it take me


	3. Chapter 3 Common Thread

Chapter 3

Common Threads

I stayed in my room unpacking and getting a feel for the place, I was going to be calling home for the next seven months ahead of me. I was scared and felt so alone. The smell of lavender in my room was calming. My anxiety had been so heightened the last few weeks, plus with the added stress with coming here, that when I finally got to my room and was able to relax, it all caught up with me and I fell into one of the greatest naps of my life. I was dead to the world.

I was awaken by a tapping on the door. I looked at my watch, I had only been asleep for almost and hour. Alice was standing in the hallway, when I opened the door. I could see she had changed clothes once again and was now sporting a pair of black leggings and a t-shirt that said "_ Caution: Human/Vampire Hybrid on board"_. She had a way to make you smile, even if its threw her clothing.

" Hey, Mama Esme sent me to come get you for group"

"Okay"

I closed the door and walked with her down to a room that had chairs positioned in a semi circle. I sat beside Alice. A woman with black hair sat beside me, I didn't get a good look at her. I mostly kept my eyes to the ground. I caught a flash of bright red hair walk past me and sit beside Alice. I could tell she was very young. Alice seemed to be the only one at ease. Esme took her place in the middle of the chairs facing us. I know she told me earlier, that there are five of us including me. Esme looked up from her notebook and scanned each of my faces. She briefly looked confused before she asked Alice if she knew where a girls named Rosalie was. She replied that she had just gotten out the shower and would be here within the next few minutes.

The silence in the room just made me that much more nervous. Three minutes later, I can hear the sound of a woman's heels coming down the stairs. The tall blonde, who I now had gathered to be Rosalie walked in and took her seat. She could easily pass for a runway model. I guess even models make mistakes.. Truth is this situation effects all types of people. We were all here for the same reason, despite our backgrounds and the obvious statuses of the haves and have not's , We were all bound by a common thread, Our babies.

" Okay lets get started shall we, in case you haven't noticed we have a new face to our group. We will start with introductions. You may say as much or a little about yourself. But you must always include your name, age, and where you're from. Who would like to start? Esme said

I should have known Alice would be the one volunteer first. I had a feeling she talked any time she was given a chance. I liked that she seemed to not let things get to her, She was making the best of it all. I could too.

"Hi, everyone. I am Alice Brandon, 18 and from Chicago, Illinois. I am four months pregnant tomorrow. I recently had my second ultrasound, I am so pleased to announce that the technician thinks It's a girl. My morning sickness is nearly gone. I'm thinking of naming her Tiffany after the store, not the singer. My favorite label is Chanel and I think it would be a perfect middle name… Tiffany Chanel has a ring to it, doesn't it? I'm here cause apparently my condition looks bad for daddy the congressman. My hobby is designing clothes and shopping. The baby's dad isn't in the picture. He was a man I met in new York during fashion week… he was a model for Calvin Klein. Who knew a simple pair of boxers could so be life changing"

" Thank you, for sharing Alice, Okay how about you Emily?"

Emily's hair was black and her complexion was a sun kissed bronzed. It wasn't a fake tanned glow but natural. She could have been native American, but I wasn't sure.

" Hi everyone, My name is Emily Call. I'm 16 and I am from Oklahoma. I am five months along. I will be having a boy. The father of my child is a married tribe elder, so my parents sent me here so that our family wouldn't be banished from our reservation. I'm working on getting my diploma and I would like to eventually go to college and become a lawyer.

I could hear sniffling coming from Emily, my heart ached for her. I wondered how much older the elder was. It's a shamed that he got to be with his family and she had to be away from her. She was homesick and this was probably the first time she had been without them for an extended amount of time. Esme rose from her seat and embraced Emily. She rubbed her head and whispered words of encouragement to her, in a way being mother-like to a girl, who no longer had hers. Emily felt better after a few moments and esme returned to her chair.

"Okay, I think Victoria should go next"

" Hi everyone, I'm Victoria Nomad. I'm 14 and from Augusta, Maine. I am in my seventh month. I am here cause this place is a better alternative then the streets. My parents kicked me out when they found out. I am also working on getting my diploma. The father of my child was a high school sweetheart. I believed he was the one and got pregnant when I lost my virginity . He bailed as soon as I mentioned the word baby. I am having a boy also. His name is going to be Jameson Chance.. Because of him I have a second chance at life. He's my courage and strength that reminds me everyday, that I am loved and here for a reason. I don't really have any hobbies other then writing. My hope for the future is to write the next greatest American novel.

" I am sure you will do everything you set out to achieve, if you put your mind to it Victoria". Esme's eyes held such pride an admiration for the young girl. I could never throw any child of mine on the streets . I would be so racked with worry, wondering if they are cold, wet and hungry. If they were safe and alive. I guess some people weren't meant to be parents

"Rosalie, your turn"

The blonde shifted in her seat and a look of anger and aggravation were very displayed on her face and body language.

" Do I fucking have too?, what does it matter that I share anything about myself? Its not like any of you bitches are going to see me after all this shit is over, I'm here to make sure my pregnancy is healthy and that He goes to a very good family. But if it will please everyone. I'm Rosalie Hale… I'm 21 from LasVegas, Nevada. I'm just about six months. The father isn't important , He's busy being someone bitch in jail back home. He's there cause he didn't understand the word no and I'm here because of it.. I don't have a damn hobby. I particularly don't care for people in general. … everyone Happy?"

" Rosalie, I understand that you are angry and with a lot of therapy and time, things will get easier for you with proper care. Don't shut us out, We are all here for one another. Don't take it out on the rest of us, We don't deserve it" Esme scolded. The only thing Rosalie could do was nod her head and look away.

" Bella, everyone knows you just got here, but we all would like to know whatever you are comfortably talking to us about"

"Um… My name is Bella Swan. I'm 17 . From Forks, Washington. I am just a little over two months. I was sent here cause my parents didn't want to become a small town scandal. Everyone there thinks I left already for college back east. I got pregnant also during my first time. He wasn't a boyfriend or even a friend, just a relative of a old classmate.

"Thank you for sharing with us Bella and welcome to Cullen house. I wanted to share a bit of good news with everyone. My Son Edward has expressed his intentions to come back home and join Cullen House as part of the medical staff. He's very familiar with how we do things here. He will replace Dr. Tyler near the end of the month. He will be here in a week, so that he get acquainted with everyone and start looking at your medical information. It had always been a dream of mine that this place still be operational once I pass. I am a very proud mother, just thought I would share that with you. We will have a very special welcome home dinner for him on Friday.

I was still so tired when I walked back to my room. I had yet to talk to my parents. I didn't bother when I landed to call. I think it's a good thing that I put some distance between them and me. It upset me a bit to witness Rosalie be so angry, Was I going to end up like that? Was I going to let what happen to me rob me of having a life. I was never a spiritual person , but I do believe in karma… and every dog has their day

**An: I don't own Twilight… but I do own Eclipse. I want to first thank everyone over at TWCS… These people rock. I was absolutely blessed to have so many reviews and favorites. These people took the time and reviewed. They encouraged me and gave me an honest opinion. It was a good feeling that someone enjoyed it enough to let me know. So ladies and (gents) Thank you. I am truly astonished and humbled..mandi**


	4. Chapter 4 Mother's Embrace

Chapter 4

Mother's Embrace

Its didn't take me long to get the hangs of things here. I was partnered with Esme for rest of the week. It was a rule that the newbie be shadowed by our house mother for all intents and purposes. I loved being with her. We spent the better part of the week planning her son's welcome home party. I learned a lot about him threw Esme. He 's name is Edward Anthony Cullen. He's 25 and recently completed his training in the obstetrician and gynecologic field of medicine. You could see the absolute love in her eyes, when she spoke about him. I searched my 17 years of memories and couldn't recall a time, my own mother looked at me like that.

We planned an very extensive menu. She wanted to make sure all of us ladies ate properly, while also making sure Edward had his favorites. Our tastes changed , I noticed daily. Alice was craving tomatoes. It didn't matter whether they were cooked or raw. She ate them constantly. Mrs. Cope had joked about starting a garden, just for her alone. Emily and Victoria were constantly on the hunt for sweet and salty things. Rosalie just walked around here chomping on ice. I didn't have any craving yet. I did find out the one thing that would turn my stomach upside down was the smell of popcorn being cooked or eaten near me. How could something I loved to smell as a child , cause my stomach to protest against me. Esme says it was all apart of pregnancy.

How many children do you have Esme?" I asked while we were in the car, on the way to Port Angeles for party supplies

" I was blessed with Edward only"

" Did you crave any foods with him "

" I'm not Edwards birthmother , he's Birthmother was named Elizabeth, She was 15 when she came threw Cullen House back in 1985. She wanted to know her son went to a loving family and I had recently found out that children would not be possible for my husband Carlisle and I. He is my son in every way that matters. Family doesn't necessarily mean blood, love come in all forms"

IMS****IMS****IMS****IMS*****IMS*****IMS*****IMS*****IMS*****IMS***

By Friday before Edward's arrival the house was a buzz of activity. Alice and Victoria were in charge of decorations. Emily and I helped with the menu. We were having a fiesta themed party. Mexican was always Edwards favorite according to Esme., He was especially fond of the Texas fajitas. Emily and I chopped onion, peppers and cut up steak and chicken. Mrs. Cope made sure the shrimp was de-veined and peeled. Alice had asked for extra cilantro in her salsa. The smells alone were making me so hungry

Esme was scheduled to meet Edward at the airport at 5pm. She left a quarter till. It was up to all of us to make sure everything was in its place.. The dinning room was decorated with welcome home signs and sombreros.. Alice had gone overboard, just like Esme said she would.

Rosalie did manage to come down a bit before Edward and Esme were due back. I could tell she wasn't feeling well. She looked a bit pale and just worn. The doctor had come in an checked her but said she was probably just tired cause she was in her third trimester and it was normal. I wanted to keep and eye on her just in case. I felt an odd kinship with her, whether she knew this or not.

Around 6 pm we heard the car as it crunched the gravel in the drive way. I helped Mrs. Cope bring the food to the dinning room. The ladies had already made there way and sat at the table . I was the last to be seated so I had to seat close to the head of the table. We heard a murmur of voices, as they got closer I could hear Esme tell Edward to close he's eyes, that we had all worked hard today on his surprise and he wouldn't ruin it by peeking. Edward towered over her by a good foot. It was hard for her to keep her hands near his eyes. Edward kept his eyes shut, didn't once peeked until Esme said he could,

When she let go of her hands and he opened his eyes, my stomach did flips, which I blamed on the peanut and its protest that I didn't feed it yet. I had never seen eyes like he's before. They were green, almost emerald like. He's hair was an odd color, The only copper I knew of belonged on a penny. It suited him though. He was very tall, I would guess around 6 foot.

" Thank you ladies for a very special welcome home dinner, I wished you didn't go threw a lot of trouble"

I couldn't speak, I really didn't know what to say to the handsome doctor. The good thing about Alice is what I lack in social skills, she flourishes.

" It was really no trouble, You're important to Mama Esme and She is Important to us, so whatever we can do to make her happy. She has her son back home, so it benefits us greatly to see her happy" Alice exclaimed

"Oh by the way I'm Alice Brandon and Miss Mute over here". She pointed her finger at me " That is our newest resident and my best friend Bella Swan, We are pleased to finally meet you Dr. Cullen.

"Its nice to meet all of you, Its good to be back home, I've missed it a lot. Please call me Edward, Dr. Cullen is my father"

Esme took the seat at the head of the table and Edward sat beside me. I felt my body stiffen. I wasn't used to being around men who weren't related to me. I didn't feel as if he would hurt me. It was a just a reaction. Dinner was so good. We out done ourselves. Edward thanked us for the wonderful meal. He said he hadn't had a cooked meal this good since the last time he was home. He tried to make small talk with me, but I stayed quiet.

" Edward, you have to forgive our Bella, She just got here a few days ago and she takes awhile to warm up to new people"

" I completely understand mom"

" I look forward to meeting all of you and getting to know everyone a bit better, I will be with Dr. Tyler during exams Monday and with mom during group."

Rosalie and I cleared the dishes. I don't recall her speaking during dinner. I pre-washed and she loaded them in the dishwasher. She looked at me with such sadness. She was cute pregnant. She wore it all in the front..

" Bella, after we finished with the dishes, do you think that maybe we could go take a walk to gazebo, I really need someone to talk to"

I was surprised that she wanted to talk to me. I couldn't imagine what she wanted to talk about. I had only been here for a few days. The only person who bothered to talk to me and attempt to be friends was Alice. She had retired for the evening.. Emily was still in the living room where Edward and Esme were. Victoria had left for a shower.

I went into the living room to see Esme, Emily and Edward all laughing. I didn't want to interrupt but I wanted Esme to know where we Rosalie and I would be in case someone came looking for us.

" Um… excuse me Esme, Rosalie and I are going to take a walk out back to the gazebo"

"sure sweetheart, take a sweater, The nights here can get a bit chilly" Esme advised

I couldn't help but glance over at Edward, he was smiling at me and I could feel his beautiful emerald eye bore into mine. He didn't make me feel uncomfortable, just different.

" okay I will Goodnight everyone and Welcome Home Edward"

" Thank you Bella" He's voice even made me feel a bit funny. I kind of liked it. I quickly shook my head of any thought about liking anything to do with Edward or any other male. I was here because if my superior thinking,

I noticed that Rosalie was already at the gazebo. I took a seat beside her. She didn't acknowledge my presence. She kept staring at the darkness. I shifted in my seat and she began to talk.

" I've always wanted to be a mother, I wanted a house with the picket fence. A husband to kiss me when he came home from work. I didn't have aspirations to be rich or famous. I just wanted a family. I though I found the perfect man in Royce. Our families had been friends for years. I knew he liked me, The feeling was mutual. The night of my parents anniversary party. We were all having a good time, I had a glass or two of champagne. Royce had a a lot more then I did. I was nervous about taking a walk with him, when he asked. He had never been violent with me, so I had no cause to think that night would be any different.. We were about a hundred yards from the house when he attacked me. I begged and pleaded, but it did no good. My father found me when I didn't return to the party. He took one look at me and knew what happened. He asked me if Royce had done this and I had told him yes.

He was arrested and pled guilty. I found out I was pregnant six weeks later. I came to Cullen house on my own. They said they would help find a family for him, if that was my intention. I hate the way he was conceived , I don't hate my son."

" Rosalie, I appreciate you talking to me" I said

" I'm not telling you this so you can feel pity on me Isabella, I'm telling you to let you know you're not alone. Don't take me for an idiot and try to deny it. You wear the same look I do, extra cautious of your surroundings, You cry in your sleep and tonight when Edward sat beside you at dinner only confirmed it. The way you clamed up on us, you barely spoke. I know I don't say much, but it doesn't mean I don't observe. The diffrence between you and I is that I have the peace of mind at night that I know the monster who hurt me will never see me again. You're still in fear even though you are far away. I even bet your family doesn't know, but someone does, don't they"?

I was in shock, the tears were flowing freely down my face. How could some one pick up on all that just by watching me. I felt relief and sadness that I wasn't alone in what happened

" yes, Jacob, a friend of mine in Forks, I called him to come get me when I was left, he cleaned and fixed me up. I made him promise to never tell a soul. I just wanted to forget it ."

" We have babies on the way Bella, we can never forget it"

**An: I am still blown away with the reviews and favorite alerts. They make my day**

**For timeline purposes I'm going to explain The month is July**

**Bella is 2 months and is due In February**

**Rosalie is 6 months and is due in October**

**Victoria is 7 months and is due in September**

**Emily is 5 months and is due is in November**

**Alice is 4 months and is due in December**

**Lots of babies coming soon… Next chapter Edward gets to know more about Bella and Charlie comes to visit**


	5. Chapter 5 Cause and Effect

Chapter 5

Cause and Effect

My talk with Rosalie gave me perspective, It helped me realize that I wasn't alone in my pain. She was right, she read me like an open book, I guess I'm not very good at hiding things. I wasn't good at all, My parents were just very unobservant.

I didn't want to have to face this right now. I needed time to think. If I told my parents, would they believe me? Its my word against his.

I didn't check my phone at all the first week. My parents knew where I was, They could reach me , if they wanted. I refused to think about them. The more I got to know Esme, The more I liked her. Edward truly lucked out in the mother department. I can only hope I could find a family like that for this baby. I admired Esme, she is one of the most kindest and selfless women I had ever had the pleasure of meeting. Just seeing her with Edward is proof that blood doesn't always make you family.

Saturday afternoon I took a walk outside, soaking up all the warmth I could. The heat felt so good against my skin. I hadn't really had a chance to explore the grounds. There was a pond adjacent to the gazebo and a huge shade tree near. I sat down beside the tree just looking at the water. It was so peaceful. I closed my eyes and let the sounds relax me. I must have spaced out when I felt someone standing over me. I looked up and saw Edward in a pair of jeans that hung low on his hips and a plain black t-shirt.

" I used to come here and sit by this tree when I was a kid, Its peaceful here isn't it?"

" Yes, It is"

He sat on the grass beside me, but kept a safe distance

" Did you enjoy your welcome home party"

"Yes I did thank you , I hope it wasn't much trouble, My mom can over do it when it comes to parties"

" It was no trouble at all, It gave us something to do, It was fun…um did you want to be here by yourself, I could leave"

" I'd like to have the company if you don't mind"

" Okay."

" So Bella, tell me about yourself"

" Didn't you read my file?"

"Yes, I did but that just tells me basics, not who Bella Swan is as a person"

" I'm no one exciting, I promise you. Just a Girl who had her whole life ahead of her and now she doesn't "

" I don't believe that at all, What are you almost 18, You have a lot to look forward to"

"I'll be 18 in September, That was nice of you to say, but forgive me if I don't believe a word of it"

" You're angry, I didn't mean to say anything to upset you"

" I'm sorry, It not you who sent me here, Can we start over I'm Bella"

He reached over and took my hand. My whole body flushed with warmth. We pulled back suddenly and he looked at me with an unreadable expression

"um, I'm Edward"

We watched the ducks on the pond for a little bit, occasionally throwing pieces of bread out to them from a zip-loc bag Edward had brought out with him.

" Can I ask you a personal question" Edward blurted out

" You can ask, But I can't guarantee that I will answer you"

" Does the father know about the baby, I'm only asking cause your parents sent you here and the only information on your file is that he is an acquaintance"

I felt a surge of anger boiling in my blood. Who the fuck is he to question me about that bastard. He doesn't know me. He just got here and because he's my new doctor, he thinks he is entitled to that information. I didn't tell my parents who he is, what makes this asshole think I will tell him.

" Bella, I'm just asking, cause your file says you intend to go threw with an adoption and that information is required to get all releases of parental rights"

" You mean I have to name him and ask him to sign his rights over for an adoption to take place?"

" I'm afraid so, that's the law in Arizona"

" Edward , You don't understand, there is no way that I can face that man again"

" Bella I know you're not comfortable telling me things, but I hope you know when your ready you can come to any of us and we will be there for you. My mom adores you, I just wanted to let you know that we are here for you anytime"

" Thank you Edward, I appreciate that a lot"

*******(*)*********(*)**

I stayed in my room except for meal times, the rest of the weekend. I was thankful that Esme and the others could tell when I needed some alone time. I wanted what was best for my child and in order for him or her to go to a good home, I would have to speak about what happened.

Sunday night after everyone had went to bed, I crept to Rosalie's room to talk to her. If there was anyone who I felt comfortable talking to, It was her. I tapped on the door a couple of times. It didn't take her long to answer it. She was standing in a pink bathrobe and her hair was wrapped in a towel.

" Hey Rosalie, I didn't mean to bother you, but do you have a few moments so I can talk to you'

"Yeah, have a seat on the couch and I'll get dressed and be right out"

After a few moments, She came out dressed in pajamas. She looked at me and came to sit beside me. She grabbed my hand and held it. I didn't know exactly where to start. She moved closer and put a pillow in her lap and I laid down. It was comfortable and I felt safe. She rubbed my head, like I remember my grandmother doing, when I was a small child.

" Rosalie, I have to name the father before I can give the baby up for adoption, I am so scared. I don't know what to do. It makes me so mad that he could do this to me, but I have to seek a release of paternal rights before this baby can go to a good home."

" I know Bella, It's not right, You can't help but feel victimized all over again. He damn sure didn't ask your

permission to have sex and now you have to ask him for his rights The laws aren't fair a lot of the times. What are you planning on doing?"

" I thought about it most of the weekend. I don't have a choice but to let my parents know what happened and to get the ball rolling so I can get the paper signed, so I can give this baby a good home. It deserves that much"

" Rosalie?"

"Yea, Bella"?

" I have to tell Esme first, will you be there when I do?, cause I don't think I can do it alone"

" You don't even have to ask, I'm here for you"

I drifted off to sleep in Rosalie's lap that night. I could feel her baby kicking the side of my face as I went to sleep. She was going to be an awesome mother, when the time came that she wanted to be. She was a natural

********(*)********(*)********(*)*******

Monday afternoon, We were all scheduled to see the doctor for our check-ups. Alice had spent the morning making us all a cute shirt of our own. She walked in all hyper and awake. The rest of us were all tired. Emily was convinced she was double fisting red bulls. What ever she had, I wanted some. I was exhausted and nauseous . I never did throw up. Rosalie told me that her early days were horrible and that she had to be put in the hospital twice due to excessive dehydration.

" Rosalie, I saw this and it fit you perfectly Alice said handing her a black t-shirt that had the words _I'm growing a human, what have you done today?_

It was really cute, Its fit her sarcasm

Victoria was painting her nails, when Alice walked up to her with a pink shirt that said

_You Touchy - I bitey _I was told she really hated it when people touched her. She didn't understand what drove non- Prego people to do such a thing.

Alice gave Emily a light blue shirt that said _Got epidural?_. She was deathly afraid of the pain and needles. The closer she got to her due date the more she freaked out about it she was.

I noticed Alice had on a darker blue shirt that said _Mom's with girls, Go straight to Tiffany's_

Alice walked over to me and handed me a green shirt that said _I love my wombmate_. She was a character and a joy to be around. She made me laugh and after a few tense days, I needed it.

***************(*)***********(*)************(*)

I sat up from the exam table ,hearing the paper crunch as I moved. I was thankful I didn't have to go threw the internal exam again. I knew at sometime I would have to have it done. I didn't want Dr. Tyler to touch me any more then necessary. I wasn't as apprehensive about Edward touching me. I felt safe with him, like I do with Esme and Rosalie. I liked the idea of being his friend.

I decided to check my phone. I had it off ever since I left Forks. I didn't want to listen to all the fake ass friend, that were suppose to be there for me when I needed them

" _You have 10 messages…"_

" _Message 1 Bella, This is your dad, I was just making sure you made it to Arizona well. I don't blame you for not wanting to talk to me, I'll just call Mrs. Cullen to check on you"_

Delete

_Message 2 "Bella , This is Mike Newton, I really need to talk to you, Please call me back_

Delete

_Message 3 Bella, Hey girl It's Lauren… I wanted_

_Delete_

_Message 4 "Hey B, Its Jake, I wanted to check up on you and see how you were, I Miss you" _

_Save _

_Message 5 "Bella! It's your Dad, I need you to call me back ASAP! Jake has been arrested for assault on James Newton and the only thing he will say is that you would know why!"_

_Save_

_Message 6 " Bells, This is my one call and I had to call you to tell you I am so sorry, But the fucker had it coming, Now they are asking questions, I don't know what to do._

_Save_

_Message 7 " Isabella, I want to know NOW what James Newton has to do with you and why when we asked Jake why he put James in the hospital, all he would say that it was for you"_

_Delete_

_Message 8 " Hey Bells, Its Angela, I wanted to check on you and see how you were doing, Your parents said your left early for Dartmouth , Call me back_

_Delete_

_Message 9 " Isabella Marie, You give me no choice but to get on a plane to come there, You refuse to answer any calls and the answering service at Cullen house says they will relay the message to you. You haven't called so I will see you first thing Tuesday morning. _

_Delete_

Shit …Shit…. Shit. He is coming here. My time had run out

AN: I apologize in advance for any mistakes. I want to thank the awesome I'm Random Girl for her rec for this story on FB. She is my ultimate fan fic pusher. I read everything she rec's and writes. She is amazing .I am thankful for every review, fave and alert. I will work really hard to make my stories better and worthy of every one of my fans


	6. Chapter 6 Flight or Fight

**Chapter 6**

**Flight or Fight**

_**Message 9 " Isabella Marie, You give me no choice but to get on a plane to come there, You refuse to answer any calls and the answering service at Cullen house says they will relay the message to you. You haven't called so I will see you first thing Tuesday morning. **_

_**Delete**_

**Shit …Shit…. Shit. He is coming here. My time had run out**

**********(*)**********(*)*******(*)*******

**I checked the time It was 5 pm. I knew I had at least till 9 am tomorrow to deal with this. How did this happen? **_**Damn Jake**_**. I hated that he was now affected with this mess. If I didn't call him, he wouldn't be in jail now. I had to admit it gave me a bit of satisfaction that James was in the hospital**

**I tried to calm myself, My body was shaking beyond control. I was so scared. Its didn't take long before everything I had consumed at breakfast and dinner had resurfaced. I was no better at dinner. I pushed around my chicken fettucine alfredo around in my plate. I had to do something. My mind was running a million miles a minute, If I paid attention, I would have seen the three people staring at me during dinner.**

**I helped Edward in the kitchen with the dishes, it amused me even if he was a doctor, he was still esme's son and he too had chores here. I was pre-washing and he loaded. He could tell I was clearly distracted when I broke a glass and cut my hand. He quickly grabbed a towel and applied pressure to make it stop**

" **Bella, what's wrong, I can tell something has you upset, its not healthy for you or the baby to put yourself under so much stress"**

" **My dad is on his way to see me"**

" **yeah, Mom mentioned he called earlier wanting to come for a visit, is there a reason why that would make you upset?, I thought maybe a familiar face would be good for you, help you adjust to being here" **

" **He's not coming as a dad, he's coming as a cop, I assure you"**

" **why did you do something?"**

" **No! , of course not, A friend of mine was arrested for something that I involved him in, I feel so guilty for it"**

"**Did you make your friend do something illegal?"**

" **No, I would never"**

" **If you didn't tell him to do anything illegal, then its not your fault"**

" **I shouldn't have called him that morning I was ra…., never mind"**

**I thanked him for helping me with my hand and left for the bathroom to put a Band-Aid on it.**

*******(*)*******(*)*******(*)*******(*)******(*)**

**When the others were in the living room playing Yahtzee. I stayed in my room. Esme, Alice and Rosalie all came in to check on me. I told them I was fine, that I was just tired. I laid in my bed contemplating what I was going to do. I laid in bed till It was about 3 am. Everyone by now had went to bed. I got up put all my clothes in a duffle bag. I checked how much money I had on me. It wasn't much but I would be okay for a little bit. I cleared my savings before I left forks. Cullen home provided everything for me, so I spent none of it. I dressed and slowly made my way down stairs. I tried being very quiet. The last step creaked and I paused making sure no one was up. **

**I was beyond terrified. The shaking was off the charts by now, my breathing was shallow and I could feel the moisture in my hands and on my forehead .I have to leave, I'm to scared, I thought I could be brave and face it head on and finally admit everything, but I am to chicken shit. I'm worried about facing Charlie. I make my way to the door. I unlock the deadbolt and just when I am about to open the door. I hear the flicker of a lighter. In the corner of my eye I see the cherry of a cigarette brighten and I know someone is sitting on the couch. I stay real still. Right about now I want to be invisible. It didn't take long before I heard his voice…. Fucking Edward**

" **Bella, Where are you going at 3 am"**

"**Edward, I have to leave, I cant be here when Charlie gets here later"**

**I hear him rise from the couch and bare feet tap on the hardwood floors. He is walking towards me. The darkness makes me nervous. I can see where he is at cause my eyes have adjusted to the dark and his cigarette is still lit. I watch him put it out in the ash tray before walking the rest of the way towards me. I shift my bag on the other shoulder, It was becoming to heavy. I could feel his eyes on me **

" **Bella, Please don't leave, don't do that to me, It would kill me knowing you are out there somewhere and not knowing if your okay, Think of Esme, You would crush her"**

**I started to cry, I hated thinking of hurting Esme like that**

**I could feel Edwards hands move towards my face, I flinch involuntary but he doesn't pull back. He rubs my face with the tips of his thumbs. I. could feel the shaking subside and my body began to relax. I drop my bag and he pulls me into chest. His smell and presence calms me.**

" **I Can't face Charlie, he wants to know why My friend Jake put James in the hospital, He doesn't know what James did, but Jake knew. I involved Jake by calling him to help me and now this is all my fault"**

" **Come sit on the couch, and talk to me. I'm here for you. You don't have to do things on your own"**

**By the time I was finished telling him everything, light had begun to come threw the windows and I was in his lap, my head resting on his shoulders. I could feel his body shake slightly, I raised my head to look at him and I saw a flash of anger in his eyes, I knew he wasn't angry with me**

" **Bella, I promise you will never be hurt like that again, as long as my heart beats"**

" **Edward, you can't promise me that, I will leave after the baby is born and head to Dartmouth and I'll be alone. No one can save from all the evil out there"**

**When I started to fall asleep I heard him whisper**

" **I can and I will"**

******** (*)********(*)*******(*)********(*)*****(*)*********

**When I woke I was in my bedroom, I turned and noticed the clock was already 1pm . I knew by now Charlie was here. The Calmness I felt in Edwards arms had now evaporated. I decided all I could do now was to face the music and get it over with. **

**I could hear muffled voices in the kitchen. The closer I got I could tell it was Esme, Rosalie, Edward and Charlie**

"**What happened last night?" Rosalie asked**

" **Shes afraid of facing Charlie and tried to leave " answered Edward**

"**I've never done anything to hurt her, I don't know why she would be scared of me" Charlie said a little louder**

" **Mr. Swan , she's just scared, because of the reason you're here, if you would have come here on unofficial police business, She wouldn't have tried to run" Edward said answered with a slight twinge of anger**

" **I love Bella, always have Dr. Cullen. I just want to know why her friend is facing a 15 year prison sentence for essentially trying to kill a man"**

**I heard Rosalie snort " A man, that's funny"**

**I couldn't listen anymore. I walked into the kitchen and saw the four of them sitting at the table**

" **When everyone is ready, I'll meet you in Esme's office. Its still smelled of pine sol. I sat on the couch . Rosalie and Esme came and sat beside me on the couch. Edward took a chair across from me. Looking at him gave me comfort. Rosalie put her arm around me. Charlie walked in and sat beside Edward. **

" **Bella, I just want you to understand why I have to be here, Jacob refuses to cooperate with us, Billy is upset he's son is in jail. I need to know what put him in such a rage that he broke 4 of James Newton's ribs, fractured his skull, and a compound fracture to his right arm. The man is rough shape. He's had massive internal bleeding. All we know is that James came in the garage to get his car worked on and Jacob flipped out and beat him with a tire iron. We questioned him and all he would say it was for his bells and he doesn't regret it. No one but Billy and I know that he calls you Bells, so I have to ask, what happened to make him so angry, This behavior isn't him at all"**

" **Dad, I feel so bad about Jake being in jail, I was stupid to think this was going to stay a secret. I want you to know that I never meant to disobey you that night. I wanted a chance to let loose and be a teenager. I had always done what was expected of me and never once gave you and Renee a ounce of trouble"**

**I felt Rosalie rub my back and Esme's hand grip mine a bit tighter, encouraging me to continue.**

" **Prom Night I was so excited to be going, even if it was with Jacob. I had a great time with Angela and Lauren. It felt good to be so carefree. After it was over Lauren suggested we go to Michael Newton's after party at his house. Jacob said he had to go home, cause he had to work early that morning. We had the limo drop him off. When we got to Mike's Lauren and I split up. I started drinking a bit. James tried to hit on me and I declined his advances. A little while later, I couldn't fine Lauren and the limo was gone. I had no way to get home."**

" **Bella, you could have called one of us to get you, I always thought we had the type of relationship that you could have come to me for anything" Charlie said**

" **I wasn't supposed to be at that party, I definitely wasn't supposed to be drinking. If I called you everyone would have gotten busted for drinking. James wasn't drinking and I asked him to give me a ride home"**

**I tried to choke back the tears. My throat was starting to sting. I was starting to break down. Remembering what had happened was physically painful. I remember every punch and slap. I remember that when he violated me, that it felt as if I was being rip in 2. I couldn't control the sobbing. I laid my head Rosalie's shoulder. I whispered " Rose, I can't do this, Its so hard. It hurts too much" Rose put her head on mine and whispered back " I Know it does B, I'm right here with you, You are so fucking brave and I am so proud of you"**

**I composed myself enough after a few minutes. I couldn't look into my dad's eyes. I didn't want to see the anger and disgust.**

"**I got in the car with …. James, I must have dozed off a bit. I didn't wake up until I felt him pulling me …out his car. He…. Dragged me to the edge of the woods near the La push cliffs. He beat me pretty bad and…. Raped me. **

" **Oh My God, no" Charlie said I looked up at him and I saw a broken man. I didn't see any malice towards me. The tough cop had disappeared and what sat before me was a devastated dad.**

**I had to finish. I know it was going to be hard. I hated to see the pain in my dads eyes and it killed me even more to hear the him cry.**

" **I was hit and knocked out, I am judging it was a few hours. My clothes were tore up, but he dumped my purse. I called Jacob to come get me. I told him what happened. He cleaned me up and nursed all my wounds. We made up a story that I stayed at his house with his sister and he brought me home and a few weeks later I find out I'm pregnant and now I'm here"**

**Rose and Esme never loosened their grip on me, it was like they were holding me together. I looked at Edward and I could see the redness around his eyes. My dad was a mess.**

**My dad came over to me and pulled me up off the couch and hugged me**

" **I am so sorry baby, I love you more then my own life, I never wanted you to think you couldn't have come to me with anything, I should have known something was wrong when you started acting different, I just thought you were nervous because you were moving away to college, I promise if it's the last thing I ever do as your dad, I will make James pay for what he's done to you."**

" **Dad, It's bad enough that Jacob is in jail because of me, I don't need you getting into trouble also. I'm just glad I finally told you. It takes a lot off my mind. James cant get to me anymore. I'm here, He knows nothing of the pregnancy. I'm still going with the plan, stay here, have the baby, and by next year I will be in Dartmouth."**

*****************(*)**********(*)***********(*)**

**Charlie decided to spend the rest of the day with me. We went to dinner. I even let Alice dress me. After an emotionally charged afternoon., I just wanted a quiet dinner with my dad. He took me to a really nice steakhouse. I usually wasn't a big meat eater, but since the pregnancy I seemed to like it more. I really loved the blooming onion with the zesty sauce. I was going to get heartburn later, but it was worth it.**

**I couldn't remember a time when he and I did anything like this. I didn't ask about Renee and he didn't offer any information. **

" **Bella, when I get back home, I'm going to have to charge James with rape, Its my duty as a cop and most of all a father to see you have justice, that's if he makes it threw the beating that Jacob gave him" Charlie said on our walk back up to the house.**

" **Does that mean, I'm going to have tell other people,?"**

" **I know it really hard for you to tell what happened, but there may be a chance this makes to trial and u will have to testify, Your still a minor so you can do it anonymously."**

**Charlie said goodbye to the Cullen's and the other girls before he left. Victoria had a huge crush on his mustache. He gave Rosalie a hug and told her that he was grateful that I had an wonderful friend to lean on here and that if she ever needed anything to never hesitate to call him. He said the same to Esme and gave Edward a pointed look and told him to take very good care of his daughter. He told me he would visit again soon and then he left.**

**I felt sad but relieved at the same time. I was exhausted and decided to turn in earlier then everyone else. When I got to the 2nd**** story Edward was standing there leaning against the wall near my door. We just stood there staring at each other.**

**I walked closer to him and he pulled me into a hug. I was once again blessed with calmness he made me feel.**

" **I am so proud of you sweetheart, you are one of the strongest women I have ever met"**

**My eyes started to slightly sting with tears. They overflowed when I looked up at him. I could help it. I felt so drawn to him and thankful that he helped me get the courage to face my father and tell him what happened. I put my hands behind his neck and brought my lips to his and kissed him**

**AN: whoa, I spent many many hours on this chapter. Hope I didn't disappoint the reveal. I am thankful for every review, alert and fave. I didn't research adoption laws and anything that was written is from my head and may not represent actual laws. Its for purpose of Fan fiction only .. Reviews get a EPOV next chapter. Whew! **Fangs****


	7. Chapter 7 Home and Heartstrings

Chapter 7

Home and Heartstrings

I spent my entire life in Cullen House. I always knew I would be an obstetrician / gynecologist when I grew up. It was always my mothers and later on in life my dream to come back and help my mother Esme run the home. She had always went above and beyond for the girls and myself. This home was her passion. I saw my first baby born when I was 6. The scene scared me to death.

I couldn't get past all the screaming and blood to truly see the beauty of life. It wasn't till I was in high school that I truly appreciated the process. Being around these woman gave me a deeper respect for women in general. They taught me to be a gentleman and to be responsible . While my friends were laying everything with a heartbeat, I took the time to develop a relationship. I would never do the things that the women who came threw these doors had happen to them. My first sexual experience wasn't until I was 16 and I made sure I was well protected. I would have never intentionally burden someone my age with a child.

I took those lessons with me to college and medical school. My mother would always remind me that she raised me right and if she every heard that I was less then honorable to a woman, she would have my ass no matter how old I was. I was also very lucky that I had such a wonderful father growing up. He showed me how a man was suppose to love a woman, to be loyal and protective of her. They started Cullen house because my mother had once been a pregnant teen herself and was shunned by her family. She was sent away with nothing and became homeless. She ended up loosing her child because she didn't have proper care and a place to feel safe. My dad was the one who operated on her, when the miscarriage made her hemorrhage. She had to have a hysterectomy and any future children would never be possible.

My biological mother was one of the first women who came to Cullen House. She was 15 and frightened. Esme says that I look so much like her. We had the same eyes and hair color. My biological father was a friend of her dads. He was married with a family of his own. She quickly found out he never had an intentions of marrying her. Esme and Elizabeth became really close friends. When it became almost time for my birth, she told Esme that she should be the one to raise me. My mother loved me enough to let me go and have a solid chance at life.

Esme still talks to Elizabeth, She sends me birthday cards still and attended my high school, college and medical school graduations. She never tried to talk to me. She stayed in the back ground, content in just getting the experience. She eventually married and had another son Embry. Who is 10 years younger then I am. I keep in touch with phone calls and emails. We try to see each other at least once a year. It had been harder for us to stay in contact once I went off to college. I am glad I was finally coming home. I miss my mother terribly. Mom would call me every week, she would tell me a bit about some of the girls who came there.. She would never betray their trust. She just would give basic details and fill me in on her days. I was packing up my apartment, when she called me one night. Mom didn't seem like herself. I could tell she was a bit sad. I asked her what had her down and she said that she got a new girl in named Bella and that her situation had saddened her. She mentioned that her parents had sent her there and that she felt it was going to be a difficult adjustment for her.

The day I arrived home was one of the happiest days of my life. My mom had been so excited to have me home. The welcome home party was an added treat, but I wish mom didn't go all out for things like this. She was always having a party. Its didn't matter the occasion to her. She says life is full of celebrations and we must honor every one of them. I was spoiled with a Mexican themed dinner. Mrs. Cope and the ladies truly went out of their way.

The Moment I laid eyes on Isabella, I was curious and completely enamored by her. I knew from looking at her file that she was young, but certainly not the youngest we had ever had at Cullen house sadly. My mother had also taken a special interest in Isabella.. Bella , My mother would later tell me that she preferred . She said that Bella reminds her of the daughter she never had. The day I spent with her feeding the ducks was a turning point in my life. There were no doubt that she is portrait of pure beauty. I could tell by her body language that she had certainly been hurt. I also noticed she was slightly more relaxed with the other ladies and my mother. I wanted to know more about her.

The night that we had washed the dishes together, Bella had acted very differently . She was distracted and when she broke the glass in her hand, That was the first time I got to touch her. I held her hand on the guise of stopping the bleeding. I liked holding her hand. She was warm and we connected perfectly.

" Bella, what's wrong, I can tell something has you upset, its not healthy for you or the baby to put yourself under so much stress"

" My dad is on his way to see me"

" yeah, Mom mentioned he called earlier wanting to come for a visit, is there a reason why that would make you upset?, I thought maybe a familiar face would be good for you, help you adjust to being here"

" He's not coming as a dad, he's coming as a cop, I assure you"

" why did you do something?"

" No! , of course not, A friend of mine was arrested for something that I involved him in, I feel so guilty for it"

"Did you make your friend do something illegal?"

" No, I would never"

" If you didn't tell him to do anything illegal, then its not your fault"

" I shouldn't have called him that morning I was ra…., never mind"

She didn't have to finish her sentence. I knew.

Bella didn't come out of her room for activity. Alice, Rosalie and mom all went and checked on her. She just said she was tired. I fought with myself to check for myself. I knew she wasn't okay. It was something more. I could feel the fear rolling off of her.

Later that night, I had a feeling something wasn't right. I couldn't sleep. My mind was spinning with thoughts of Bella. I put on a t-shirt over my pajama pants and sat on the couch. I heard the creek of the last step from the bottom of the stairs. I watched her walk to the door and turn around. I was nervous that she had seen me. She didn't say anything and I knew her eyes hadn't quite adjusted to the dark. I heard her unlock the deadbolt and I knew she was going to run. There's no way I could let her leave. She was far away from home and alone. I couldn't bare to watch her leave. I decided to make my presence known when I lit a cigarette.

" Bella, Where are you going at 3 am"

"Edward, I have to leave, I cant be here when Charlie gets here later"

I stood up from the couch and walked towards her, It was taking everything in me not to grab her and hold her to me.

" Bella, Please don't leave, don't do that to me, It would kill me knowing you are out there somewhere and not knowing if your okay, Think of Esme, You would crush her"

It hurt my soul to hear her cry. I lightly touched her face and wiped her tears. I felt propelled to comfort her and I grabbed her and hugged her. I wanted to protect her and care for her. In a matter of days this small girl made my heart feel things that were so foreign to me.

" I Can't face Charlie, he wants to know why My friend Jake put James in the hospital, He doesn't know what James did, but Jake knew. I involved Jake by calling him to help me and now this is all my fault"

Bella started to ramble and I could tell she was on the verge of a panic attack

" Come sit on the couch, and talk to me. I'm here for you. You don't have to do things on your own"

When she got finished telling me what had happened to her. I was thankful I was here in Arizona and not Washington. I would have done the exact thing Jake had done. He was my new hero. I was glad she had someone to care about her, like I did. I wasn't going to fight the way I feel about her. I wanted to be her friend, and to protect her from all the things I could. I was angry and could feel my blood boil. James needed to be castrated with a dull knife.

" Bella, I promise you will never be hurt like that again, as long as my heart beats"

" Edward, you can't promise me that, I will leave after the baby is born and head to Dartmouth and I'll be alone. No one can save me from all the evil out there"

The thought of her leaving here when she had her baby panged my heart. I knew she had a plan for her future. I would be a fool to hinder that. She was still young and had her whole life ahead of her. I could feel her relax and her breathing slow. I knew as along as I had her with me I would do what I could.

I can and I will, I murmured against her head. When I was sure Bella was finally asleep, I carried her to her room and put her in the bed.

I tried to get some sleep and finally gave up around when the sunrise came through my window. I walked into the kitchen put on some coffee. Mrs. Cope and mom were in the kitchen getting breakfast ready. I pitched in and started mixing the batter for the blueberry waffles.

" _How was your night Edward"_ Mom asked me

" _To be honest I didn't get much sleep"_ I responded to her while incorporating the berries

"_Mom , Can we talk in your office for a few minutes?"_

We both walked in her office together and we sat in the chair

" _Mom, Bella had a rough night . I couldn't sleep and walked into the living room and caught Bella trying to leave. _

" _Did she tell you why she was so upset, Does she not like it here? Did I do something?, Did any of the other girls do something? Edward, I love you, but if you done anything to hurt her. I will tear you a new ass son"_

"_NO! NO! MOM!, I would never hurt her. She is terrified of her dad coming today, he coming to question her on an incident involving a friend of hers, I'm not going to get into detail, but it has to do with why she's here"_

" _Well whatever it is, We are going to be there for her"_

We walked out the study to see Emily, Alice, Rosalie and Victoria putting their dishes in the sink. Mom and I sat down to have our breakfast, we sat in silence for the next hour until the knock on the door. Mrs. Cope had answered the door

" Welcome to Cullen Home, may I help you"

" Yes, I'm Chief Charlie Swan, Isabella's father, I've come to see her"

"Oh of course, I'm Mrs. Cope, I am the part of the staff here, I will let Mrs. Cullen know you have arrived, please have a sit in the living room"

Mom went and met Chief Swan and let him know Bella was still resting and informed him of what happened last night. Mom let him know that I was the only one who knew the reason why. He followed her into the kitchen, where I was.

" What's this I hear about Bella trying to leave last night?" The chief questioned as he sat at the breakfast nook

" Sir, I'm going to respect Bella's wishes and I wont go into detail, but to make a long story short, She panicked when she found out the reason you were coming for a visit. I understand you have to ask her some questions, but as her Doctor, I will not allow you to upset her and compromise her health and that of her baby."

He started to say something when Rosalie stomped in the room. How still managed to wear 5 inch heels and heavily pregnant is beyond me

"What happened last night?" Rosalie asked

" She's afraid of facing Charlie and tried to leave " answered Edward

"I've never done anything to hurt her, I don't know why she would be scared of me" Charlie said a little louder

" Mr. Swan , she's just scared, because of the reason you're here, if you would have come here on unofficial police business, She wouldn't have tried to run" I said not trying to hold in my anger

" I love Bella, always have Dr. Cullen. I just want to know why her friend is facing a 15 year prison sentence for essentially trying to kill a man"

I heard Rosalie snort " A man, that's funny"

" When everyone is ready, I'll meet you in Esme's office" Bella said as she walked into the kitchen. I was surprised to see her. She then walked out and left us all staring at each other.

" Well I guess we better go into the office" Mom sighed

Mom and Rosalie sat beside her on the couch, surrounding her with female support. I knew if anyone could relate to what Bella was feeling, It was Rosalie. I sat across from Bella. I could see her relax when she locked eyes with me. I knew she had to do this, but my heart ached for her no less.

Charlie shifted in his seat and started to speak

" Bella, I just want you to understand why I have to be here, Jacob refuses to cooperate with us, Billy is upset he's son is in jail. I need to know what put him in such a rage that he broke 4 of James Newton's ribs, fractured his skull, and a compound fracture to his right arm. The man is rough shape. He's had massive internal bleeding. All we know is that James came in the garage to get his car worked on and Jacob flipped out and beat him with a tire iron. We questioned him and all he would say it was for his bells and he doesn't regret it. No one but Billy and I know that he calls you Bells, so I have to ask, what happened to make him so angry, This behavior isn't him at all"

Bella took a huge breath and started to respond

" Dad, I feel so bad about Jake being in jail, I was stupid to think this was going to stay a secret. I want you to know that I never meant to disobey you that night. I wanted a chance to let loose and be a teenager. I had always done what was expected of me and never once gave you and Renee a ounce of trouble"

I could see mom and Rosalie give her an encouraging embrace to help her continue. I could see the tears starting to redden her eyes. I knew she had to get this out the open, so that she could start the process of healing.

" Prom Night I was so excited to be going, even if it was with Jacob. I had a great time with Angela and Lauren. It felt good to be so carefree. After it was over Lauren suggested we go to Michael Newton's after party at his house. Jacob said he had to go home, cause he had to work early that morning. We had the limo drop him off. When we got to Mike's Lauren and I split up. I started drinking a bit. James tried to hit on me and I declined his advances. A little while later, I couldn't fine Lauren and the limo was gone. I had no way to get home."

" Bella, you could have called one of us to get you, I always thought we had the type of relationship that you could have come to me for anything" Charlie said

" I wasn't supposed to be at that party, I definitely wasn't supposed to be drinking. If I called you everyone would have gotten busted for drinking. James wasn't drinking and I asked him to give me a ride home"

Bella whispered to Rosalie and I watched Rosalie whispered something back to her. I knew she was going to have the trouble with the next part.

"I got in the car with …. James, I must have dozed off a bit. I didn't wake up until I felt him pulling me …out his car. He…. Dragged me to the edge of the woods near the La push cliffs. He beat me pretty bad and…. Raped me.

Then I heard Charlie cry out. I had never heard a man cry the way he had. On the outside Chief Swan was the ideal tough guy, The one who very seldom showed his emotions. He was a doer, he fixed problems. This time Charlie couldn't fix this one. This was much bigger then a broken foot or skinned knees.

" Oh My God, no" The chief started sobbing.

I could see Bella loosing her resolve and wanting to comfort her father. But she had remained strong and finished telling him

" I was hit and knocked out, I am judging it was a few hours. My clothes were tore up, but he dumped my purse. I called Jacob to come get me. I told him what happened. He cleaned me up and nursed all my wounds. We made up a story that I stayed at his house with his sister and he brought me home and a few weeks later I find out I'm pregnant and now I'm here"

Chief Swan grabbed Bella and cocooned her, he wanted to take away her hurt so badly. I wanted to myself.

" I am so sorry baby, I love you more then my own life, I never wanted you to think you couldn't have come to me with anything, I should have known something was wrong when you started acting different, I just thought you were nervous because you were moving away to college, I promise if it's the last thing I ever do as your dad, I will make James pay for what he's done to you."

" Dad, It's bad enough that Jacob is in jail because of me, I don't need you getting into trouble also. I'm just glad I finally told you. It takes a lot off my mind. James cant get to me anymore. I'm here, He knows nothing of the pregnancy. I'm still going with the plan, stay here, have the baby, and by next year I will be in Dartmouth."

Rosalie , Mom and I decided they needed this time together so we left the office so they could have their privacy.

******(*)********(*)*******(*)*******(*)********(*)*******(*)

Bella and Charlie went out to dinner. Our own dinner at home was a solemn one, especially for Rosalie, Mom and I. The others could tell something was off with us and were quiet also. After Dinner Victoria complaining of not feeling so well, She was in her last trimester and had gestational diabetes. I took her into the exam room and checked her sugar and blood pressure. It was little more elevated then I would have liked. I told her she needed to rest and that I would be back up later to check up on her.

My mind was still preoccupied with Bella and her situation. Everyone here was effected by Bella. Rosalie shared a bond with her, Mom saw her as a daughter, Alice had someone to make t-shirts with and was an excellent sport when she wanted to do fashion shows. Emily enjoyed being read to by Bella and Victoria finally had someone who could beat her at yahtzee. I had to admit she made me feel things for her. I was so carefree with her. She cold make me laugh and be myself. This house is much more pleasant with her in it. I know she was going to leave her in awhile, I wasn't sure how I felt about that yet. I knew I would miss her and so would these ladies.

Charlie had stayed long enough to tell everyone bye and let me know to take good care of his daughter. I was worried for a second that he could sense my affection for his daughter

After Activity, I went to Victoria's room to check up on her. The blood pressure had gone back down to a safe zone and I was walking out her room when I heard Bella walk up the stairs. I stood by her door cause I wanted to tell her Goodnight and I was proud of her today. She stopped a few feet from me

Then she took a few more steps towards me and wrapped her arms around me in a hug. I loved the way she felt against me, it felt almost like we were melting into one another.

" I am so proud of you sweetheart, you are one of the strongest women I have ever met"

Then she did the last thing I expected her to do. She kissed me. The feeling of her lips on mine were heaven and hell at the same time. They were soft and I couldn't help myself when I sucked her bottom lip in. I knew we had to stop when I heard her moan. This was wrong. She had just had a traumatic day and I was her doctor, not to mention she was still a minor. I moved away from her and she looked at me with a blank expression

" Why did you do that Bella?"

" I wanted to say thank you for everything you had done, if it wasn't for you, I don't think I would have had the courage to tell my dad everything. And the first time I was ever kissed was that night and it wasn't by choice and I wanted my next kiss to be by my choice. I understand it may be inappropriate Edward, cause of my age and the fact that you're my doctor, besides your going to be seeing a lot of my hooha, shouldn't I at least get a kiss first" She starting laughing. I loved hearing it.

I had to laugh also, It was pretty funny and she did have a point. It was hard to remain professional with her and that scared me a bit. Even though I was attracted to her I had to keep a boundary between us.

" Bella, I want to be your friend and you make me feel things, but I have to be a professional with you. My mother would have my ass if she thought for a second that I was taking advantage of you"

" I promise Dr. Cullen, The next time that you kiss me, you will do it"

She then walked in her door and I was left dumbfounded by the whole exchange and perplexed by the tingling sensation on my lips. I went to sleep with a smile on my face

**An: I know this chapter is way past due. Sorry I got caught up in reading The Plan by **Quant Um Fizzx. **if you read it then you will understand why it consumed my life for days and days. Also the holidays threw me back. I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday. I want to give a big THANK YOU to The Twilight awards(.) com and Robrator for the amazing new banner I won for their Banner giveaway. I will upload a link on my profile soon. I also appreciate all the reviews, alerts and faves. They make my day, truly****J**

**If you are on FB my Profile name is InsertFangshere. I have the banner on that page also.**

**Next Chapter: Renee 's letter to Bella…**


	8. Chapter 8 Poison Pen

Chapter 8

I noticed I developed a small bump the other day. It was kind of cute to see. Alice also noticed and made me wear a new shirt. _'my bump, my bump, my lovely lady bump_," to make it extra cute she included "_ check it out " _on the back. When I went to for my exam the first thing Edward said was " I see Alice got a hold of you today

" Yes, she never misses a thing does she"

" No, she doesn't"

" Okay, Bella lay back and I'm going to check heart tones and measurements"

There was nothing ever said about the kiss Edward and I had. It wasn't weird for us after. I was content on being friends. I was not in a position to seek a boyfriend and beside Edward had a point. He was an adult and my doctor, plus we both knew I was going to be leaving next fall for college and I wasn't emotionally ready for a relationship.

Edward was a sweetheart and an excellent doctor. I did enjoy Mondays when I had to see him for exams.

" I'm going to say sorry in advance Bella, I know the gel is cold"

He lifted up my shirt till just below my breast area and pulled my yoga pants further down my hips below my new "bump", like I said I enjoy Mondays

"Shit, no matter how many times you warn me, I'm never ever prepared for the it, I swear it gets colder and colder. I'm buying you a damn warmer for Christmas. You would throw it in the microwave, if you truly cared"

He took the Doppler and moved it around and pressed it on my stomach, he moved it around a couple times until he located the baby's heart. It sounded like a hummingbirds wings in flight. It was so fast, at first I was worried and Edward assured me the heart was healthy and normal.

August was now here and I felt so bad for Victoria, The heat was getting worse and she was becoming more and more miserable. She tried to lessen the torture by taking cooler showers and ice packs. She was huge and I was scared to get that big. I was convinced she had about five babies in there. She was due next month and I was looking forward to not seeing her scary belly. I asked Rosalie at what point does the bump go from cute to grotesque. She just laughed at me and said that it just looks that way to me and I was just scaring myself.

We were having group today and the topic had to do with childcare and adoption. Rosalie had picked out a small list of potential adoptive parents for her son last week and they were all coming to meet with her this week. Alice had decided to keep her baby and stay in phoenix. She had been in contact with the baby's father and he wanted to come see her. If she could find a happy ending to her story, then I was happy for her. Emily's parents had a tribal meeting and found a couple that were of the same tribe, but lived on a different reservation in Oklahoma . Our youngest Victoria, I was especially worried about cause she was just 14 and really had no family, even though Esme was her guardian. She had found a really nice couple who lived here in Phoenix, They agreed to an open adoption. She was allowed to visit and have pictures of her son. I was due to meet with her in September

My dad has started calling me once a week for the last 3 weeks ,since I had come clean with everything. I looked forward to his phone calls. We had a better relationship because of it. Jacob had been bonded out of jail and James was still in ICU, and there was standing warrant for his arrest. He's room was now under police protection and only immediate family were allowed to visit. James's parents had taken out a restraining order to keep Jacob from his room. I had yet to talk to Jacob. Dad didn't think it was a good idea since he we both were involved in an active case.

Esme and Edward expressed a desire for me to start getting individual therapy. Charlie had agreed with them, when I mentioned it to him during last weeks phone call. So my first appointment would be on Wednesday with Claire Dupree a therapist who specializes with rape victims. I hated to use the world victim, it made me sound helpless and weak, I was a survivor damn it ! I was strong and courageous, at least that what even one at home said.

I woke Wednesday with my nerves all over the place. I kept fidgeting threw breakfast and the closer it got to my appointment with Ms. Dupree, the worse it got. Esme had driven me there and Rosalie wanted to go, but I told her I needed to do this on my own. She said she didn't like it, but she understood. The last several weeks had proven that she was very protective of me, like a little sister.

There was nothing special about Ms. Dupree's office, it was painted yellow and it had a celestial theme to it. She had black hair and blue eyes. She was a little on the fluffy side but spoke with a calming and reassuring voice. I watched her give Esme a hug before she left. I had the feeling they knew each other.

" Hi Bella, My name is Claire and I want to use this session to kind of get to know each other a bit. I want you to know anything you say to me will be between us. I know trusting me will take awhile to do, but please know I would never betray you confidence"

"Um, okay" My nerves was still a bit on edge but I was slowly relaxing.

" I would like to start out by asking you to tell me a bit about yourself, is that okay?"

" My Name is Bella Swan, I'll be 18 in 5 weeks. I am from Forks, Washington and I'm an only child and currently 12 weeks pregnant"

" What are your parents names?"

" Charlie and Renee Swan"

" What does your parents do for a living Bella?"

" My dad is the Chief of police in my hometown and Renee's profession is small town socialite"

" What was your life with your parents like before you came to Cullen House"

" I was a bit sheltered, I didn't go out like other people my age. I had three close friends back at home, being a cops daughter had a certain disadvantage. I got excellent grades in school. I've been given a full scholarship to Dartmouth . I wrote short stories,poems and read books for fun. I lived a pretty uneventful life."

" How has your life changed since moving here to Arizona?"

" It was freighting at first, But when I met Esme, She and the other girls accepted me and didn't judge me, They make feel almost like a part of a family and I didn't have that back in Washington.

" I wont ask the details of your attack until you are comfortable to discuss this with me, but Esme mentioned that her son Edward has come home to join her staff and it's been my experience that people who have this type of trauma will often shy away and have extreme anxiety when in close proximity to the opposite sex, Have you had any episodes like this?

" I though at first when he came, that I would have an issue but im comfortable around him, he's been a great friend, He's the one who gave me the courage to tell my dad what happened, I hope to have a friendship with everyone there for a long time after I leave"

" What are your plans as of right now Bella?"

" I plan to meet with the adoption liaison next month to start finding parents for the baby, I'm not due at Dartmouth until almost a year from now, I took a year to get my life straight and to deal with all of this"

"Well Bella, Its has been a wonderful pleasure meeting you and I look forward to seeing you next week"

*****************(*)***********(*)**********(*)*****************

When I got home there was a flurry of activity, The girls with the exception of Victoria, were dressed up a bit. Victoria was laying on the couch and when I asked her why she wasn't dressed she said that Edward didn't like her blood pressure and it would be best if she didn't go. Alice told me there was a carnival in town and it would do us all some good to get out the house for awhile.

I had to agree with her, Alice ushered me to my room where she had laid out my clothes, a pair of black shorts , pink tank top and matching sandals. The heat was pretty bad during the day but the night it tend to cool off some. I went down stairs and Edward was on the couch with the girls, I could feel his eyes on me. I walked over and sat next to him. He had his left arm around the top of the sofa, I could feel him play with small strands of my hair it was relaxing and sending tingles from head to toe.

He leaned over and his lips were inches from my ear, I could help but to lean into him a bit. Goosebumps starting spreading across my skin. I was confused as to why I reacted this way to him. I admit I was attracted to him, but I know I could never act on my feelings. I decided then I would blame the hormones and I would remind myself to ask Rosalie if pregnancy had anything to do with the way my body was reacting towards Edward.

" How was your meeting with Claire, Do you like her?"

" Yeah, She seems friendly, I think it went well"

" You will have to tell her the next time you see her that little Edward wants some Kentucky pound cake"

" Huh?, How do you know Ms. Dupree

" Claire used to be a resident when she was 18, She was here when my biological mother was here. She kept her daughter and stayed here until she finished college, She originally from Louisville, Kentucky and she makes this pound cake for me anytime I ask. She helped Esme raise me, I grew up with her daughter Tanya."

Alice had motioned to me that it was time to go and I went to get up to leave when Edward touched my hand and I looked back at him and he curled his finger to signal for me to come closer

" Can you do me a favor Bella"

"Sure, I can" I croaked my throat feeling a bit dry

" _Be Safe"_

****************************(*)**************(*)**********************

The carnival was really fun, even if we weren't able to ride the attractions. There were limitation to what we could do since we had babies to think about. We did get a slow ride on the Ferris wheel, ate sausage dogs, I had extra onions and mustard.

Alice won a huge Pooh bear at the pop a balloon game. Emily and I both won goldfish doing ring toss. Rosalie ended up getting nothing cause she wanted to argue with the guy who could guess your weight that his scale was" fucking rigged: , her words not mine. I don't think she wanted to admit that she had gained 10 more ponds in the last week alone.

The guy introduced himself as Emmett and gave me his number to give to Rosalie, saying he liked her and that he liked them feisty. What kind of guy tries to hit on a woman who just cussed him within an inch of his life, to each his own I guess.

We finally made it home about 10 pm and Edward was waiting for us to get in, I briefly noticed him breath a sigh of relief ,when he saw me, like he had been holding it in all night. I hoped he wasn't waiting for me to come home. I was putting the our fish , we had decided to name them Romeo and Juliet in a bowl so that Emily and I could put our fish in, when I caught a glimpse of Edward walking towards his bedroom for the night.

By Saturday, Victoria's blood pressure wasn't any better and now Edward had to give her medicine and a steroid injection for the baby's lungs, just in case she didn't get any better and the baby would have to be born early. Edward has also ordered complete bed rest. I know I wasn't much older then her, but her poor young body couldn't handle a growing child. I knew the younger we are getting pregnant, the more we were at risk for things like this.

On Monday, She had improved but she was still borderline. Alice and I had to take turns sending her meals. Watching Victoria going threw so much had made me concerned about my child . I guess this was another way to scare myself

We watched a birth on DVD in group, If I wasn't already scared, now I was fucking terrified and to quote baby mama, " _you can't come back from that"_

I got another all clear from Edward and once again he said sorry for the cold gel. I get the feeling he putting the bottle in the freezer, no one else seems to complain. I was on my way to take a shower when I saw Esme sitting in the living room with anxious look on her face

" Bella, Can I talk to you for a minute"

" Yes, of course, is something wrong"

"Don't worry yourself sweetheart, you didn't do anything wrong, A letter came in the mail. Its from Washington. It doesn't have the senders name.

She handed me the envelope and patted the seat next her to silently tell me to sit with her

I sat

I opened the letter and given the familiarity of handwriting … it was from Renee

" Renee wrote this"

" How do you know?"

" I know her handwriting"

August 9th 2010

_Bella,_

_There are no words to describe how much you disgust me. Is it not bad enough you whore around Forks and get yourself knocked up Then you have the nerve to concoct a total fabercation by telling your father that Michelle Newton's oldest son James raped you. You have embarrassed yourself and this family. I was completely floored when Michelle told me that James was in ICU because you had one of that boy from Lapush beat him,cause James refused your advances towards him. I thought I raised you better. When she mentioned that you accuse him of rape, I knew then you would be dead to me. What makes matter even worse is that you have managed to manipulate Charlie into beliving you. He created an investigation solely based your accusation. I hope you are proud of yourself, you miserable lying whore. If it was up to me, you wouldn't be going to college, so I suggest you be thankful for that full scolarship bitch, cause I refuse to pay for it. You may have your Dad snowballed, but I damn sure see you for the cunt you are. I hope you enjoy your little vacation in Arizona. I would advise when its over you come home and pack the rest of your shit cause you are no longer welcome in my home. I will always regret your birth and the fact that im responsible for it . _

_Renee_

I always knew she was a mean and hateful woman. But the words she said had rocked my whole body. I started to shake and cry hystericaly. My breathing were coming in short gasps and panic had coursed threw me. I don't know how long I had been like this, I heard Esme calling my name. I couldn't stop, it felt as if my heart would explode. She had called me a few times before yelling for Edward to come. I wanted to tell her I was fine, but couldn't even form any words. Its wasn't long before I saw him on his knees in front of me

" Bella, Bella… answer me sweetheart,

I didn't answer

" Mom , What happened, What was she doing before she starting a panic attack"

" She was reading that letter… She said it was from her mother Renee"

Then I felt a small pinch in my arm and I relaxed and sleep took over

**AN: Thankyou for reading, I truly appreciate every one of them. Many of you asked me if homes like these were still around. I'm Random Girl on sent me a link to one that was still in operation. Living Vines in Savannah,Ga is a christain maternity home for young girls.. It helped reasearh that much easier for me. I want to also send a huge fucking thank you to ROBRATOR for making an awesome banner for The Twilight awards(.)come for being selected for their banner giveaway. Please read and review**

If there is enough reviews.. I will write a Charlie pov that takes place when he arrived back in Forks.

mandi


	9. Chapter 9 Anatomy of Loss

**Chapter 9**

**Anatomy of Loss**

**The best day of my life was when Isabella was born. She held my heart since the day I looked into those beautiful brown eyes. She will always be and has always been a daddy's girl. There were times I sensed that Renee was jealous of the relationship Bella and I have, as Bella got older the spats between Renee and her got even more heated. I thought at first it was just normal for a teen to be at odds with a parent. Bella was a good girl, never gave us a lick of trouble. I couldn't understand where all this animosity was coming from. She was an ideal child.**

**She always got good grades, was always helping people and doing volunteer work. I could name dozens of families who wish they had children, like Bella was. I knew something was wrong the days following prom night. She was withdrawn and barely ate. I could hear her crying at night, when she thought I was asleep. I just thought the upcoming move was making her feel this way. The moment Renee told me about the pregnancy I wont lie, I was disappointed . She had worked so hard for this scholarship and to throw it away was devastating. I was very familiar with the sacrifices she was going to have to make, being a parent. I had made them for her. Renee and I had married and were pregnant while still in high school. I discarded my hopes for college and went into the academy so that I could provide for my new wife and child. When we got the news that Bella could defer her admission a year, it was the blessing, we both were looking for. **

**Renee's family had come from money. I never wanted any part of it. I was always the type if I couldn't get it on my own, I didn't want it. I worked for everything I had and to me that was more important then have it handed to you. I liked simple and Renee liked everything else. I did really love Renee at one time but then we just stayed together for Bella. She was almost 18 and I just didn't see a reason to justify it anymore.**

**Sending Bella away both hurt and relieved me. I wanted her away from Renee and her constant bitching and name calling. It wasn't long before everything came unraveled. My best friend Billy's youngest child Jacob was arrested for beating James Newton and imagine my surprise it all had to do with my Bella. I tried calling and when I had no luck reaching her. I knew I had to see her.**

**When Bella told me about the rape, I knew she was telling the truth, it all fit, Jacob bringing her home, her withdrawn behavior. It also warmed my heart and made me at ease about Bella being gone when I met all the people she was living with. They had nothing but love for Bella. I even had to admire Dr. Cullen for being so protective of her when he told me that my questioning will stop if I put her under stress. When I got home, I opened a case and started to investigate James Newton. It had always been my experience that if a man could rape once, he was very likely to repeat. It was a gut feeling whether its be a cops or dad intuition that he has done this before**

**I started with Lauren since she was the one who brought her to the Newton party. I asked her to meet at the station to interview and since she was still a minor, she had to bring a parent. I was in my office when deputy mark told me that Lauren Mallory was here with her mom in the interview room 1. I picked up the case file and tape recorder and went inside.**

" **I appreciate you coming to see me Lauren, I know you and Bella are good friends and I just want to ask you some questions about prom night"**

" **Sure chief Swan, anything I could do to help"**

" **What time did you and Bella gets to Newton's house"**

" **The limo took us to Newton's about 10:30 pm"**

" **What did you do then?"**

" **We walked in, said hi to some people. We both got something to drink"**

"**What were you both drinking"**

" **There was a punch bowl full of **_**juice**_**"**

" **What is **_**Juice **_**made of"**

" **it's a drink made with liquors like patron, vodka, ever clear, rum and mixed with fruit juice and fruit garnish" **

"**What did you do next"**

" **I went to mingle with friends and Bella went to sit on the couch"**

" **Did you see her again after that"**

"**yes, I saw James sitting with her and then I went back to talking with my friends"**

"**Was that the last time you saw Bella?"**

"**Yes, it was, James came up to me a few moments later and told me that Bella had said she had a ride home and wouldn't be riding back with me in the limo.**

" **Then I got onto the limo and left. Chief Swan is Bella okay, I've called her a lot and she hasn't called me back"**

" **She will be fine Lauren, I wouldn't worry about it, She going through a lot of stuff and she will call you when she's ready"**

**I sent the solicitor my preliminary findings and he issued a warrant for rape. **

**I got home and sat the file in my office and came out to the kitchen to find that Renee had cremated dinner again, It was a good thing I had a heavy lunch. I wasn't in the mood to eat but I gave off the impression I had finished my meal, threw the rest away and went to watch what was left of a baseball game. I must have dozed off cause I woke to Renee screaming**

" **OH MY GOD… IT IS TRUE, BELLA IS ACCUSING THIS BOY OF RAPE!"**

**I look up to see Renee with my case file. That was confidential information and it should not be in her hands**

" **RENEE, THAT IS A POLICE MATTER AND YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO GO INTO MY OFFICE!".. I yelled**

**She put the file on the table and sat across me on the sofa.**

" **You went to see her in Arizona didn't you" **

" **Yes, I did and I believe every word she has told me, How did u find about this anyway**

" **I had lunch with Michelle Newton today at the lodge and she said that a warrant was issued for James and police were now monitoring his visitors and room. I am embarrassed that Bella could bring such shame on this family" **

" **Bella has done no such a thing Renee. We have a good daughter, she is smart and respectful and has never in 17 years gave us just cause to not believe her. I am a cop, I know when someone is lying**

**She gave me the file and I didn't hear anything else from Renee. For the next 3 weeks things pretty much stayed quiet with us. I interviewed some more kids at the party but they weren't much help. I talked to Jacob and let him know that I had talked to Bella and that she had told me everything. I could see the relief wash over his body. I had deputy mark interview him about the day he found her, I knew I couldn't handle hearing the state he found Bella in. I was a father and a cop and if I had to hear details I was worried my father role would overload the cop role and finish off what Jacob started.**

**When we interviewed Mike Newton, he was nervous, he wouldn't look me in the eye and I knew, he knew more then he was willing to tell me. He only answered in vague answers and I could see him tense up when I mentioned his brother. When I asked him if he saw his brother talking to Bella. He looked at me very angrily and said for him not to associate that monster as he's brother again. **

**I made a note to question him again. The doctors were testing James's brain activity daily and there hadn't been much improvement. The father in me wished for James to die but I didn't want it to be at Jacob's hand, no matter how much hatred you have towards someone to have a death on your conscience justified or not is a lot to deal with. **

**Mondays were the days I talked to Bella . She would usually call after her exam and group. I was anxious to hear about how her first session with the individual therapist had gone. I had grown a bit worried when it got to be around 6pm and she still hadn't called me. I decided to call her.**

" **Hello, Thank you for calling Cullen house, how may I direct your call?"**

" **Yes, I'm Charlie Swan and I'm calling for Bella Swan ."**

" **One moment please"**

" **Sir, I regret to inform you that all Phone calls and Mail privileges have been suspended for her indefinitely "**

" **What? This is her father and I demand to either speak with her or either of the Cullen's!"**

" **yes sir, please hold"**

" **Hello, Chief Swan, This is Doctor Cullen, How can I help you?"**

" **I want to know why Bella's contact privileges have been suspended and why I can't speak to her"**

" **Chief swan, Bella has done nothing wrong, We are doing this in related to an incident this morning. My number one priority is my patients' health and that of her baby and anytime I think something or someone will compromise that, Its my job to see that no harm will come to her here "**

" **Is she alright?, Is she hurt? Can you at least tell me that?"**

" **She is doing better and sleeping comfortably. It was quite a scare she gave us "**

" **Please tell me what happened to her." My mind was going overload, thinking the worse had happened to Bella. I would never forgive myself, if anything happened and I was all these miles away.**

" **I'm going to let you know, only because I sincerely doubt you have any knowledge of the letter and the vile repulsive things said about her, Your wife Renee sent Bella a letter in the mail and it arrived today. She called her a liar and a lot of other words I don't have the heart to say, anyway it caused Bella to have a major panic attack to the point I had to sedate her. I will not allow anything stressful to affect her and since it has, I have suspended contact until further notice. If you want you are more then welcome to contact me and I will give you updates. When she is well and able to call you she will"**

" **I appreciate you telling me and I will do everything I can to handle the situation over here and please tell Bella I love her"**

" **I will Sir, goodbye"**

**I was feeling nothing but pure rage, who does that to their own flesh and blood? Renee was out shopping and I didn't expect her back till about 9. I was conflicted about what to do. I knew deep down a talking to would do nothing for that woman. I had to make a point across to get her to understand, that I would not stand for someone meddling into an active investigation and talking to my child like trash.**

**The longer I sat in my chair, the more I realized, I had no choice in this matter, while I may be her husband, I was also a cop**

**I called Mark and told him what happened and he said that the paperwork would be done by the time I had called him. I sat in my chair and waited for her to stroll her happy ass in the door. She finally waltzed in about 20 after and immediately noticed the alcohol on her breath. I knew she had driven. Well what's one more.**

" **Renee, I need you to come in the living room, please."**

" **I got the cutest outfit today, The Mallory's are having their anniversary party next week and I needed something to wear"**

" **Renee, we wont be going to the Mallory's next week"**

" **and why the hell not, I have already purchased my outfit, I am going even if you don't want to"**

" **Tell me about the letter you sent Bella" It was taking all I had in me to stay calm and no show her my anger**

" **How do you know about that?"**

"**Answer me!"**

" **I just told her the truth, someone needed to tell her. The Newton are an excellent family and pillars of this community, I would not let my whore of a daughter slander those good people"**

" **Do you have any idea what you have done to my daughter" I didn't feel right saying her daughter, frankly she loss that privilege ages ago**

" **Nothing besides, talk some sense into her skull"**

"**You're wrong, because of you Cullen House has suspended outside contact with her, and in order for me to talk to her I had to call the answering service and be connected with her Doctor, who tells me upon reading your lovely letter went into a stress induced panic attack and had to be sedated. You have put her life and the life of my grandbaby in jeopardy and I simply cant allow you to do this again. I know you wont change and you wont stop if I simply asked you to"**

**She didn't say anything , just stomped up the stairs**

**I composed myself and sent a text to mark to head over here**

**I saw him pull up in the cruiser and tried to calm myself. I never thought in a million years I would have to arrest my wife, but she was wrong and committed a crime and I wouldn't ignore this..**

**Renee came down stairs and inquired on why Mark was here. I sat back in my chair as mark started rattling off a list of charges that included **

**Obstruction of justice, Harassment via USP mail and witness intimation **

**And since she blew a 1.2 on the breathalyzer and DUI was going to be added**

**I watched her handcuffed and she started to cry for me and I couldn't find it in my heart to give a shit**

**Bpov**

I didn't want to open my eyes, I was having such a wonderful dream of Edward rubbing my head and giving me small kisses along my face, No matter how much I wanted dream Edward to kiss me on the lips, he never did. I decided if dream Edward wasn't going to do what I wanted then I would wake up

I sat up a bit and opening my eyes and adjusting them in the low light. I saw Edward sitting in a chair beside my bed holding my left hand hunched over and his head was laying on the mattress.

I started to feel guilty for him sleeping all crooked instead of him in his bed. I started to lightly guide my fingers threw his unruly hair, he let out a sigh and squeezed my hand even tighter and murmured my name.

" You know he's been here for the last two days, constantly checking on you and the baby, He wouldn't leave your side for a moment."

I was shocked to see Esme sitting in the rocking chair in the corner, I didn't know how to respond to her and she must have sensed my hesitance.

" How are you feeling Bella?"

" I have a slight headache, but I'm better. I appreciate you being there for me, it was shock to hear that come from her mouth"

" My son adores you Bella, I can tell by the way he watches you. Its magnetic really. He moves, you move, If you haven't noticed he is protective of you . I like seeing my son happy and I realize this new friendship is a bit complicated , but I believe in fate and where there is a will, there's a way

" I like being friends with him too"

She kissed me on my head and walked out the room and I drifted back to sleep.

" I know you are awake Bella" Edward asked in amusement

" How do you know" I responded with a smile

" besides the fact you talked to me, there were changes in respiratory and heart rate"

" I talk in my sleep" I said with my eyes closed

" Well lets see if you can eat in your sleep as well"

" I'm not that good Edward" I giggled

" It will be extremely difficult to find anything that your not good at" Edward said seriously

I opened my eyes and Edward was back in his chair, in jeans and a black shirt with a stethoscope on it that said _Trust me I'm a Doctor_ . I just smile and said looked up at him

" Alice ?"

" Alice"

" How are you feeling"

" I'm fine, I'm sorry if I scared anyone"

" Don't apologize Sweetheart, it's a natural reaction to extreme stress and everything worked out so that the baby or you weren't hurt and that's the most important thing .

" I forgot to call my Dad Monday, he's probably worried"

" I spoke with him that evening Bella" He said with a worried look on his face

" I don't like that look, what's wrong?"

" I thought giving what happened Monday that's it's in your best interest and that of the baby that I suspend outside contact for awhile"

" What does that mean" I said a bit angrier then I intended

" Bella, Please understand Its my job to make sure that you and the baby remain healthy and letters or phone calls of that nature will affect you the same way again and I wont allow that to happen again.

" I get what your saying, but cutting me off from my dad will do more harm then good"

" I have talked with your Dad and he is aware of everything that happened and I told him that he is more then welcome to call me and I will let him know how you are and that all calls will for now on be initiated by you, when you feel better" he said holding my hand, while he was talking I wiggled my fingers through his. I can't explain why I did it, just felt right to do it.

Victoria went into labor the next morning. Her blood pressure had went up again the night before and she started having a severe headache. Edward and Esme Had taken her to the hospital, she wasn't able to deliver at Cullen House cause of the preeclampsia and she was still 3 weeks early.

The mood at the house was a somber one. We had bonded like Family here and for one of our sisters to be gone and in pain bothered us. We weren't in the mood to play games or even talk. The four of us stayed huddled on the couch, holding each other together until Mrs., Cope made us eat dinner even though we weren't really in the mood to eat. I wish I was with her, but I was comforted that she had Esme and Edward with her and that she would come back to us and have a healthy baby.

It had been over 12 hours that since Victoria had been gone before The moment I heard the door chime I jumped off the couch toward the door and saw Edward looking hell froze over. I wanted to ask about Victoria but fear stopped me. His face held worry and sadness. I got the feeling he didn't want to be alone.

" lets both of us have go get a shower and I'll meet you in my room in 20 minutes"

Edward didn't speak, just nodded and went towards his room.

I was already in showered and in my pajamas when Edward came in and snuggled next behind me. I felt him bury his face in my hair and I could feel his breath on my neck. We laid like this for awhile before he spoke and said the words no one should ever hear

" He didn't make it"

**AN: First of all** I want to say that I am so sorry.. I struggled with myself a lot writing this part. I cried the whole time and death of any kind is a very sensitive subject. I wanted to change this, but felt I had to stay true to the outline and the story… I apologize in advance for anyone who would be angry because of this. Life isn't all sunshine and rainbows and teen pregnancy , pregnancy in general come with risks. I was a teen mom myself and seen myself the risks this causes alone… I want to say a huge THANK YOU for the reviews for chapter 8. We all want to rip out Renee uterus and I hope Charlie having her arrested helps some.. Also I am not in law enforcement and if I got anything wrong, sorry in advance and its fan fiction and just go with it… thank you **Fangs**


	10. Chapter 10 Life goes on

Chapter 10

_**Life goes on**_

Jameson Chance Nomad was laid to rest on Saturday August 21st 2010 in a tiny white casket adorned with tiny blue flowers. Victoria had decided to call him Chance, he weighed 6 pounds 12 ounces and was 19 inches long and had a head full of bright red hair. It was later determined that the umbilical cord had knotted it self around his neck and caused him to be in distress.

When Edward told me what happened to Victoria's little boy, everything became very real . I had a life inside of me and I was responsible for this baby's health. I wasn't naïve in thinking that I could prevent everything, sometimes life turns on a dime, Chance had shown me that.

When Victoria came home a few days later, she was beside herself with grief. She didn't pull away from us. We were her family. The night of the funeral all 5 of us laid in her bed holding her, crying with her. We were sisters and we had to let her know we wouldn't abandon her and that no matter what we were here for each other.

I knew this wasn't the only tragedy that had ever bestowed Cullen House, Edward told me that Esme has seen a good bit of miscarriages and stillbirth happen in previous years, but that it always affected her sadly cause she could relate to the women. Victoria spent a lot of time with her in the weeks after Chance's burial. She decided to stay with Esme and finish school and go to bereavement counseling.

*************(*)************(*)***************(*)**************(*)

September was here and I was trying to be happy about my upcoming birthday. Alice and Esme were just looking for an excuse to throw a party and Edward said that I should just give them free reign cause we all needed something to be happy about. I was oddly looking forward to it. It meant a transition to adulthood and independence. My second session with Claire was the first Wednesday after The drama with Renee's letter and Victoria's loss. It went as well as expected. She was concerned how Renee's judgment of me and the situation had set me back. I refused to let that woman get to me and I expressed that to Claire, I was done with people trying to stop my progress. I knew the truth and in the end I believe it is that will set me free.

Jasper Whitlock came down from new York to see Alice It was a beautiful sight to see her with him. He was so attentive and was just in awe of the fact he was going to be a father soon. Her parents weren't happy about the reunion, but Alice said she was meant to be with him and no one was going to tell her different. I was envious of Alice's and Jasper's romance. They were looking to stay in Arizona, She said her family was here. I had to agree with her, I felt as if my family was here except for Charlie.

I knew deep down when it was my time to go, I would be very upset. It was funny how several weeks ago, I hated the thought of being here and didn't want to leave my family and now these people were my family in every sense of the word. A few days before my birthday I was scheduled to have my first ultrasound. I was anxious to see the baby. I felt protective of the baby, but didn't feel maternal or not the way I thought one would feel maternal.

The ultrasound tech was a lady named Kate ,who came in generally once a month. She was beautiful blonde, but she had nothing on Rosalie . I climbed on the table and lowered my pants. I liked her already, her gel wasn't cold. I told her she had to show Edward that trick before she left. I wish I had my dad with me. Alice was with Esme shopping. Emily had to attend class. I wasn't sure where Rosalie and Edward were.

I tried to get a look at the monitor while she glided the wand across the warm gooey gel. I watched her punch some buttons on her keyboard and when I inquired what she was doing, she said she was taking measurements. Since Victoria situation was so fresh in my mind, I started to worry and I didn't relax until she turned the monitor for me to see the baby. There was a light knocking on the door that diverted my attention from the baby.

" Hey I didn't miss anything, did I?"

" No, Edward, I was just taking measurements and was just about to introduce the baby to Miss Swan"

I automatically didn't like how familiar she seemed with him, but I wasn't going to let the touch of jealously override the moment I get to met the life I had inside

Edward took off his coat and walked over to me and sat beside me in the chair. He took my hand and intertwined our fingers . Kate arched a brow in question, but he smiled at her and placed a kiss on my forehead.

" Hey, what are you doing here?, I wasn't expecting you"

" This is your first ultrasound and I didn't want to miss it"

" I thought everyone was busy, I didn't see you or Rosalie and I thought I would be doing this alone"

" Rosalie is talking to the carnival worker Emmett , that you all met last month and I told you before, that you are never alone, and I want to be there for everything, If you let me"

" Yeah, sure if you want to be"

" Are we ready to get started" Kate asked breaking Edward out of our spell

" Yes, Kate" Edward said slightly irritated

Edward moved his head closer to me as Kate was moving the wand over my bump and at time pressing slightly firmer then she had before.

" Okay Isabella you are measuring right on time for your due date and you are 15 weeks and 3days.

I was shocked that little being was inside of me. I glanced at Edward and I could see him looking at the monitor with a really huge smile on his face. It almost felt right for a minute, you know the whole mommy, daddy sharing in the joy of new life. He gave me that small piece of normalcy and I was grateful. We watched as the baby legs moved and the hands went to into the mouth and what may or may not been a wave.

My 18th birthday was one of my best ever. It was intimate and classy. Alice wanted us all to dress up and go to dinner. The last time I dressed up was prom. I was apprehensive, but she insisted. Alice dressed me in a merlot colored ,half shoulder dress. She paired it with a pair of black pumps, they had a low heel for obvious reasons. Rosalie wore a simple black cocktail dress and Alice was in a soft pink halter. Victoria put on a brave face and dressed in a simple light blue wrap dress . Emily showed off her new curves in a Navy strapless. Esme was the absolute picture of pure radiance in champagne colored silk . These ladies were absolutely breathtaking and I felt beautiful being near them. Edward wore a black suit and I noticed his tie matched my dress.

We had reservations at a small seafood restaurant. I had sudden craving for snow crab legs with lots of butter. We took pictures and had a very good conversation. I felt carefree and alive. This was a turning point in my life . I had requested no presents be given to me but it didn't take me long to realize they didn't listen to me. Emily handed me a black box and I opened it to reveal a beautiful silver herringbone bracelet on the back it was engraved with all the girls names _Bella, Alice, Rosalie, Emily and Victoria __sorelle per sempre_ .

" What does this say at the end" I asked

.

" It says Sisters Forever in Italian" Edward responded

I looked up from the bracelet with tears in my eyes and to see them all holding up their left arms to show me they had matching ones also. I was so touched.

I got up to give all the girls a hug. When I got back to my seat Edward was looking nervous.

" I know you said not to get you anything but I saw this and Rosalie said how much you she enjoyed reading the short stories that Victoria and you write and I wanted to get you this"

He handed me a leather bound journal with the words _Il tuo cuore è la mia nuova casa _written on the bottom in beautiful hand written calligraphy . I looked up at him and he was looking at bit apprehensive

" Are you going to tell me what this says in Italian"

" I'll tell you when you're ready to hear it"

(*)*****************(*)*******************(*)

When I got home I went into the office with Edward to call my dad, I knew he would want to talk to me for my birthday, it was my first phone call since Renee's letter.

" Hi Chief Swan, how are you doing? Yes sir, Bella is doing wonderful. Would you like to speak with her"

" Hey, Dad

" Its so good to hear from you Bella, I've missed hearing your voice so much, How are you feeling?"

" I'm doing real good, I had my first ultrasound yesterday, Its still to early for the sex, but next time we should be able to find out. I have a meeting with adoption specialist next Tuesday

" Esme Invited me down for Thanksgiving, so that's when I'll come see you next, is that okay with you" Charlie asked

" um, aren't you going to share that with Renee, I don't think the Cullen's are going to let her come here"

I saw Edward Visibly stiffen at the mentioned of Renee and he moved closer to me, looking at me trying to gauge my emotions.

" Um Bella, after hearing about the letter, I had to have her arrested, what she done was illegal and I couldn't ignore it"

" Did Dr. Cullen Know?" I said looking at Edward

" Yes, I told him when he called me the Monday after it happened"

" Hmm, well anything else happened that I should have known about" I said still looking at Edward but now with an inquisitive brow

" The only new thing is that I have filed for divorce from Renee, so to answer your question, I will be coming alone"

I did know that my dad talked to Edward about the case, I wanted to ask but I didn't want my birthday to be marred by that topic. I made a note to ask later. But now I wanted to know why he kept Renee being arrested from me. In my heart I knew my dad wouldn't have arrested her unless he felt he did something seriously wrong, even I knew that being a cops daughter wasn't a get out of jail free ticket. He told me Happy birthday and I wished him a good night and that I would call again next Monday.

I stood in the office, looking at Edward. His eyes didn't falter from mine.

" Bella, if you looking for an apology, your not going to get one from me"

" How come you didn't tell me?"

" I've already told you, I will do everything possible to protect you and the baby and if that means making a decision not to tell you things right away, then so be it and I will gladly have you mad at me, if that means you are safe and healthy at the end of the day"

" How come you are only this way with me, touching me and hugging me, you sleep near me when I am hurt. I've never seen you shower the others with this much attention, and I want to know why"

" Do i make you uncomfortable when I touch you?."

The air was thick with tension and the closer he walked towards me the worse it got.

" Tell me" he growled

" No, I feel safe with you. I know you would never hurt me. I don't know why, I just do"

" That's how I feel, you're special to me. I don't know why but my life make more sense with you in it"

" This wont last, I have plans after my time in Cullen house is over"

He placed his right hand landed on my hip and rubbed my slightly bigger baby bump with his thumb. He began walking me backwards and we abruptly stopped when my back hit the bookcase he look into my eyes and I saw them hooded with lust and wondered if mine matched his. I could feel the wetness in my panties, I had never had such a strong physical reaction to man ever.

Edward tilted his head and grazed my collarbone with his tongue

The wetness got worse and I clinched my thighs together to try to relieve it

His lips ghosted my ear and I could feel his mouth open.

" Plans always change Isabella"

**AN: I want to Thank everyone who has reviewed this story and the ones who told me your personal story in dealing with being a teen mom or dealing with the loss of a child. They truly touched my heart *** Fangs*** 1/9/11... Today is my oldest daughter Kayla's 15****th**** birthday. She was born when I was 16 and the light of my life. We have gone through so much together and I thank the heavens for her every day.**


	11. Chapter 11 Karma's present

Chapter 11

Karma's present

Edward continued to suck and kiss along the length of my neck I had to close my eyes and relish in the pleasure he was giving me. I didn't want it to end. I felt his lips slowly wrapping around mine. We are both starting to breath heavier and I could feel the hardness of his erection pressed against my bump.

He backed away slightly, trying to see any apprehension and fear in my eyes.

"God Bella, I want to show you how special you are to me. I want to touch you" He said while still looking into my eyes.

I didn't feel any fear when I was with him, he had the opposite effect on me, he calmed me.

"It's alright, Edward," I murmured in his ear. "You can touch me. I know you

won't hurt me."

" I won't do this here"

" Your bedroom is closer then mine I responded

He lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist as he carried me to his room. Edwards bedroom was 3 doors down from the office and was painted in a hunter green His king size bed was decorated in simple black. He put me on my feet, move behind me. My breathing started to hitch in anticipation. He slowly undone the zipper to my dress and slid it down the length of my body. He retraced his fingers back up, causing goose bumps to pebble on my flesh.

Edward stopped at my small protruding belly and intertwined his fingers together rubbing his thumbs over the baby

" I want everything with you, I know your not ready to give it to me, but I want you to know I'll do whatever I have to and it doesn't matter how long it takes" he said rest his head on the crook of my neck " Just tell me you feel this to" He said as he lifted his right hand to cover my rapidly beating heart " Just tell me that I will one day have your heart, tell me I will have a chance"

" Yes, I feel it and I want it to be yours"

" Bella, I don't want to push you, will you let me make you feel good"

" Yes, Edward please, I need you"

" You will always have me no matter what, Don't ever doubt that"

He raised me on the bed and laid me down on the soft black bedding . He kissed my lips and licked his way down to my chest, he snapped the front clasp of my lace bra and my breast were exposed and my harden nipple went into his mouth.

" You are so fucking beautiful Bella, open your eyes and watch me love you. This is how it's suppose to be. This is what you are worthy of"

I watched as he lowed his tongue to circle and suck on my right nipple as his fingers rolled my left, slightly tugging causing me to become even wetter then I was. I couldn't hold in the moan he elicited from me. He didn't forget to give the same attention to the other .

He moved his hands down to my panties and I went rigged for a moment. Edward looked up

" Bella, Tell me to stop and I will. I wont ever do anything that you don't want me to, Just say it and I will stop"

" No, Edward I'm just nervous, The only experience I have, isn't a good one. I don't know what I'm suppose to do"

" Baby, Tonight is about you, you wont be doing anything. Its your birthday and I want to give you this. Please let me give you a new memory"

" Okay"

He pulled my panties down my legs and parted them with his hands. Edward used two fingers to graze my clit My back arched and I moaned in response to his touch. I instantly wanted more

" Please Edward, give me more"

" I will never deny you anything you want love, You never have to ask, you have all of me"

He moved lower and flicked his tongue against my clit and it felt like my whole body came alive with pleasure. I wanted him to rewind and repeat that action. He moaned in satisfaction when I started bucking my hips against his wet hot mouth. I was coming apart and I had to grip the sheets to keep me from thrusting myself hard into his mouth. My legs started to violently shake I was trying to prolong this feeling as long as I could but when he inserted his fingers in me it felt like a flood of relief had washed through me and I was panting so hard and my mouth was completely dry. This man had sucked every fluid substance I had in me.

" Happy Birthday Baby" Edward said as he pulled the covers over me and snuggled against me with his hand resting on my stomach and I fell asleep in his arms

****************(*)**********************(*)***********

I woke before Edward did the next morning. I couldn't bare to wake him. He had such a look of contentment on his face. I found that a bit odd since I was the one who got all the benefits . He gave me a new sexual experience to remember, one that I would wanted to.

I went to my room and showered. I felt different , my body felt like a livewire, after my shower I had entered my bedroom to grab my clothes, when I noticed Rosalie had propped her herself on to my bed. I didn't even hear her enter my room

" Damn it Rosalie, You scared the shit out of me, What you doing in here"

" I came last night to check on you and imagine my surprise when you weren't here, but there was a light on in the office and I heard what sounded like kissing through the door"

" We didn't have sex, if that's what your asking"

" Then what did you two do, read medical journals?"

" No, we made out a bit and then we went to his room and he … he .. Um

" He … um what?"

" He went down on me"

" well, well well, little miss Bella, has a dirty side"

" Shhhhh! Don't say that that"

" Did you like it, was he good?"

"Well, since he's the first person to do anything like that, I'm pretty positive he was absolutely phenomenal, I needed that release so bad, I don't know if it's the hormones or what but I get so frustrated and my panties cant stay dry. When I see him I just want to hump his leg"

" You're pregnant Bella, it's the hormones and plus you live with a fucking hot single Doctor. Don't you just take care of it yourself when you're alone?"

" Um…. I've tried with my fingers but it never done anything for me, I don't think I'm doing it right or something"

" Well use your toy"

" I don't have a toy, I was always to scared my parents would find it"

I heard Rosalie Gasp in shock and she jumped up grabbed my hand and we headed down the stairs

" What's wrong " Edward asked rising up from the sofa with a look of panic on his face

" Nothing is wrong, calm down your Bella is fine, We are just going shopping" Rosalie explained

" What are you going to shopping for?"

" We're going to go see a man about a rabbit"

Edward looked confused for a minute and then the realization of what Rosalie was talking about dawned on his face causing my body to flush with embarrassment.

" Well happy hunting ladies" Edward said smiling as he sat back down on the sofa

Three hours later I was the embarrassed but proud owner of a Deluxe rabbit pearl vibrator in blue

***********(*)*************(*)******************(*)

The rest of the week was pretty much low key. Edward and I went and fed the ducks by the pond. Its was becoming _"our spot"_. He said he's little brother was coming to visit this coming weekend and he asked if I thought maybe Emily would enjoy getting out of the house and doing something fun but _Prego safe_"

I told him I would ask.

We were laying by the bank of the pond, my head in his lap. His hand was rubbing patterns along the side of my stomach. I looked up at him and he looked to be in deep thought. When he noticed me staring at him, he seem to snap out of his fog

" Are you nervous about meeting the adoption specialist tomorrow?"

" yeah, I'm not sure what to expect"

" Well I know she will ask what type of adoption you want, either open or closed"

" I think I would like pictures and to know how the child is growing up. I wouldn't want to interrupt the child's life by visiting or anything"

" Hmm, Do know what type of family you would prefer? Married? Single?"

" I don't really care, I just want someone to give the baby unconditional love and provide everything it needs"

" Have you thought about keeping the baby?"

" No, I'm too young and I can't take care of a baby. What if I ended up resenting it because of what happened

We spent the rest of our time at the pond kissing and holding each other. I was really starting to like him a lot. He made me feel special and care for

*************(*)****************(*)**************(*)

On Monday, the baby and I got a clean bill of health. I had gained 15 pounds so far. The baby bump was very visible through my clothing. Esme said I was glowing , then looked at Edward with an _a mother knows look. _I couldn't help the blush that had risen on my face

Tuesday was the big day, Jane was one adoption liaison's for Cullen house. She was a lady dressed in a dark suit and hair tightly wound in bun.

" Welcome Isabella, My name is Jane and I'm here to guide you through the adoption process for baby Swan. I understand from your file that there is a criminal case attached and we will do everything we can to keep them both separate. We will be in contact with your father regarding any legal issues with that,and make this process as easy as possible . I want to know what you are looking for in an adoptive family, if you want an open or closed adoption

" I would like open, but just for pictures and to know how the child is doing, but I don't want any visitation"

The rest of out meeting went well, she sent me with a small 3 ring binder with profiles of potential adoptive parents.

**********(*)**************(*)*************(*)***********

I walked into Rosalie's room and she was on the phone. She held up one finger and said Goodbye to the person on the other end

" Hey Rosalie, what are you up too"

" Nothing just got off the phone with Emmett"

" The Carnival guy?"

" Yeah, actually He's a Crime scene investigator with the police department here in phoenix and was volunteering for a children's charity at the carnival "

"He's actually pretty smart, and passionate about what he does. He thinks he's the next _Gil Grissom " _She said with a small laugh

" wow, so you like him, huh?"

" Yeah, I think I do, He wants to take me on a date Saturday"

" So, what does he think about the whole baby thing?"

" He knows, I did show up with four other Prego chicks that night, I told him about the pending adoption"

" I've been meaning to ask how that went, Its been so crazy around here lately"

" The family I picked are very nice, They are a middle class working couple, have been married for 10 years. I wanted this little guy to be raised in a home with love and it was clear that they were an abundance of that when I met them and they have agreed to an open adoption. I will get to visit and be known as auntie Rose. it's a win-win for me."

" I am so glad things are working out for you"

" They will for you too Bella, I know it"

************(*)***********************(*)

On Friday, Edward and I were back at the pond. Edward sitting behind me with his legs laying next to mine as I laid against his back. I had the binder in my hands and he was rubbing my belly periodically and playfully chastising the baby for giving me heartburn and insomnia

The first family that I wanted to look at was a couple in New Hampshire. They owned a dairy Farm in the country. He was 35 and she was 31. They had been trying to conceive since they married 6 years ago. I loved animals and I liked that they lived simply

The second prospect I wanted to take a closer look at was a 32 year music teacher and her partner who taught art history at the a The university of Georgia in Athens. They have been together since their teens . I loved how cultural they seemed and they loved to travel so I knew at least that this child would be well educated and be allowed to see the world

I felt confident that I would find an adoptive family who would love and give this child more then I could

********************(*)*******************(*)**********(*)

Later that night I wasn't able to sleep. One minute I was hot the next I was cold. I went down stairs to find me some left over birthday cake. Emily and Mrs. Cope had made me a chocolate cake with fudge icing it was to die for when warm and topped with vanilla ice-cream.

The closer I got down the steps the more I could hear Edwards voice. I could see the faint light on in his office. I crept closer so that I could get hear better. Edward was on the phone, pacing around his office and his fingers gripping through his hair

"I Understand and I agree with you, But I wont keep this from Bella long"

" She's going to know something is going on"

" Well your not the one who has to face her everyday, so of course you would tell me it's going to be okay"

" I wish that you were here to help with this, I don't know how she's going to take this"

" I'll let her know tomorrow and we will decided what we do from there"

I was angry that he was talking about me to god knows who.

I let myself trust him.

I let myself feel for him

I let him touch me.

I was so fucking stupid.

I stomped my way to his office and knocked over a small side table by the chair

He looked at me with a stunned expression

NO!, Motherfucker! How about you tell me NOW!

He said he had to go and that he would call them back

" Bella, baby you have to calm down"

" You don't have a right to tell me to do anything"

I heard a noise and saw Esme running into the office tying her robe

" What is going on with you two?"

" Your son was just about to confess something to me"

" Son, what have you done?, I warned you what would happen if you hurt her"

" Mom, I didn't hurt her, I was on the phone and she came in here knocking things over and yelling at me"

" He was talking about me to some whore"

" I wasn't talking to some whore Bella, I was talking to your father"

" Why, what's wrong"

" He called to let me know that there has been some development in the criminal case"

" Well what is it, I'm a big girl. I can handle it

" maybe you can sit down"

" No I think I will stand, like I said you don't tell me what to do"

" Charlie called to let me know that James Newton was killed"

" You mean the family pulled life support on him"

" No, I mean that someone went into his room and purposely killed him"

**AN: I hope this made up for the how small last chapter was… Time will be moving on from this point. A big huge thank you to everyone who has reviewed… you rock and I appreciate all the personal stories, they move me beyond words… hi to new readers****…**


	12. Chapter 12 skeleton's  in the box

Chapter 12

Skeletons in the box

Renee made bail. I wasn't surprised, but on the condition that she have no contact with Bella and I. The last time I saw her, she had packed up her belongings and moved out. Renee didn't try to speak to me and I honestly didn't want to hear it.

James Newton condition slightly improved, He wasn't out of the woods yet, but brain activity and some function had come back to him. Jacob was put on house arrest and was ordered to stay on the reservation .

Dr. Cullen made regular updates to me, every Monday after exams like clock work. I never had to call. I was pleased to hear that her and the baby and were doing well. Bella was so excited to tell me about her ultrasound and I hated to be the one who told her that Renee was arrested. I thought she may be a bit mad at me for doing it, but Bella never does anything I expect her too.

There was never a hint of anger towards me, I had suspicion she may even be proud of the old man. The afternoon I heard about James Newton, I were on the lake fishing with Billy and Jacob, We had just put the boat on the trailer when my phone started to ring. Mark said that someone had come into his room, removed his breathing tube and had wrapped a bag around his head. I asked where the officer that was suppose to be watching his room was. He said that the only time he left his post was when the ER reported a altercation with a unruly patient, but when he arrived there was no one and the ER didn't know what he was talking about.

He went back to his post and noticed all of the alarms going off and the nurse saying she found him this way. The state police were going to take over James's murder case. I knew it was wrong to feel relieved, but I did. My daughter didn't have to live in fear of that son of a bitch anymore. James's parents immediately wanted justice for their son, as soon as I got to the hospital

" I want that Indian boy arrested for murder" Michelle Newton spewed with venom

" I cant do that Mrs. Newton, Jacob Black and his father Billy has been with me all day fishing, I can vouch for his alibi"

" Well isn't that fucking convenient, the cop and the criminal all fishing together at the same moment my precious son gets killed"

" What are you implying Mrs. Newton?, and I would warn you to tread lightly as you are very close to a slander suit"

She didn't say anything else to me.

We checked video and seen the officer talking to his radio and get up to leave.

Then 2 minutes later a person dressed in black jeans and hoodie slipped into James's room and 3 minutes and 45 seconds later re-appeared and left down the stairs.

Outside video only shows a grainy dark figure running out the parking lot and in the distance the taillights of a car .

There was no physical evidence, no prints, no hair , no fibers

The only thing left was a wooden box about the size of large jewelry box, and a letter

I had the items brought to the station. I didn't know what to look at first, so I started with the letter

_I hope by the time you are read this, that James is finally dead_. _I have no remorse for what I have done. What I did may be wrong in your eyes and the eyes of the people of this town , but I couldn't sit back and let him hurt anymore people. He used to be a good person. I don't even know the monster that is laid up in this hospital bed. The moment I found the box I knew I had to do something, I thought if I turned this in, it would be enough. But then I found out Bella Swan was pregnant by him and I wanted peace for her and her child. I wanted them to know that he could never come back and destroy their lives again._

I decided to look into the box and instantly wish I hadn't, inside were multiple plastic zip-lock bags. The bags had various items, pictures' with notes attached.

_Number/Name/ age/ method/ where/ when_

_1__st__ Stephanie Meyer 16 GHB senior prom 2006 Contents : black Panties_

_2__nd__ Bree Tanner 18 Drunk dorm 2006 Contents: red bra_

_3__rd__ Melissa Sanchez 18 Drunk frat party 2007 Contents: pink panties_

_4__th__ Amber Sullivan 18 Drunk car 2007 Contents: silver panties_

_5__th__ Jennifer Miller 17 GHB dorm 2008 Contents: pink bra_

_6__th__ Heather Vance 16 GHB hotel 2008 Contents : blue panties_

_7__th__ Megan Sykes 18 GHB dorm 2009 Contents: necklace_

_8__th__ Sara Whitmore 17 GHB hotel 2009 Contents: bracelet_

_9__th__ Bella Swan 17 Drunk cliffs 2010 Contents: blue panties_

_10__th__ Jessica Stanley 18 Beating Store 2010 Contents: earrings _

Instantly, I felt sick to my stomach. I knew something told me that my Bella wasn't the only victim. I now had a list of ten suspects. I knew Bella had an air tight alibi since she was in Arizona. The only name that I knew other then Bella was Jessica, She was Michael Newton's girlfriend, rumor was it she was now he's fiancé. I had no choice but to add Michael to the list.

After a few hours, I managed to compose myself I brought Michael in for questioning again, He seemed a bit sad,. James was a still his family regardless and while I hated the fucker, it was still a death in his family. I sat across the table from him. The box stayed at my feet. I didn't want him to see it and become agitated. I open up my manila file and started, this time I would get my answers

" I understand this is a difficult time for you and your family, but I have to ask you a few questions"

" This is hard for my parents, not me"

" Why do you hold so much hatred for your brother?"

" Why aren't you holding any yourself Chief, especially since your daughter was hurt by him"

" I hold a lot of anger and hatred towards your brother but I know how to separate my personal and professional lives"

"When is the last time you saw Jessica Stanley?"

" Why are you asking me about my fiancé "?

" Jessica's name was brought up recently"

" I saw her last night and this morning, We left for Seattle yesterday and came back this afternoon. Yesterday was my birthday and we went to celebrate it. It was a present from my parents. My dad especially wanted us to get away and take a break from all of James's drama"

" I'm going to need receipts and anything else you can provide as proof of your whereabouts"

" That's wont be a problem Chief Swan"

" Is there anything else, you want to say about Jessica?"

' um… no"

I pulled out the box and his eyes widened and face paled. Breathing became labored and he started fidgeting in his seat .

" Have you seen this box before?"

"Yes, I'm the one who found it after James was put into the hospital"

" So you know what's inside and that Jessica name is in here"

I saw Michael starting to tear up and his body visibly shaking. He rubbed his hands across his face a couple times before he spoke.

" James and I was working at the store one night. I got sent on a few deliveries so I would be gone for a few hours. Jessica had mentioned stopping by the store to bring me dinner. We were becoming more serious and had talked about moving in together. Jessica had called me when she got there and I told her I would be back in a hour, to just wait for me and we would have dinner together. When I got back Jessica was gone, James was at the counter eating my dinner. He had a 3 inch gash on his cheek, from what I found out later was her nail clawing him. I knew something was wrong. I left to find her and she was at home. Her shirt was torn and she was crying. She confessed to me that James had raped her. I was livid. Jessica saw what happened when no one believed your daughter. The gossip, rumors. She didn't want that to happen to her. He took a pair of earrings from her and I went to his room to look for them, what I found in the slats in the floor was that box and the names of all the lives he hurt. I don't understand how you got it"

" what did you do with it after you found it"

" I took it directly to my… my Oh god .. I gave it to my father"

**BPOV**

" I'm so sorry Edward , I had no right to yell at you like that"

"Bella, its fine, I would never do that to you. I understand you're not use to the hormones and they make women say and do things they wouldn't normally, but I cant allow you to work yourself up to the point that you put the life of your baby at risk. We have already had one scare with you

"Bella, sweetheart, Why don't you go back up stairs and rest, while I have a talk with my son." Esme chimed in

I was exhausted and it didn't take long before I fell asleep.

Alice drove me to my next appointment to see Claire. She went out to lunch with jasper while I had my appointment. Jasper was staying with some friends while here in Arizona. They were using this time to get to know one another better and moving forward in their relationship. She recently enrolled in school and would start after the baby was born.

I sat on the couch as Claire looked over my file, nothing has changed, but she still sit for 5 minutes looking it over. I don't know if she does it to unnerve me. It always outs me a bit on edge. She places it on her table beside her

" Tell me how you feel about James's death"?

" I'm relived that he cant hurt me. I'm relived that he cant make a claim on this child, that this baby will be able to grow up with the fear of that monster finding it. I finally feel safe, that I don't have to watch my back when I'm in public. But I feel sadness for his family, I know that's crazy, but he was still Mrs. and Mr. Newton's child just like Chance was Victoria's.

" How are you doing with the adoption search"?

" I have a few couples I like, but no one is jumping at me. I'm suppose to meet them soon and get to know them"

We talked a bit more, I felt comfortable with giving a bit more details with what happened with James. She made me fell at ease. I told her about my dad coming to see me at Thanksgiving. She told me that her daughter Tanya would be in town also and that Thanksgiving with the Cullen's were a tradition with them. She was looking forward to meeting the rest of my family.

October was already upon us and Rosalie had begun her nesting phase. She had been spending a lot of time with the adoptive parents and Emmett. Her face brightened when she mentioned his name. She was a hard ass on the outside but when you get to know her she is absolutely the most giving and loving person I have ever met. I didn't want to see her leave, I don't know how I would survive without having her to talk to.

Things with Edward and I have cooled off a bit, I suspect it had something to do with the talk Esme and he had. When I asked him about it, he just said that his mom was just concerned. I let it go. He still hugged me and gave me pecks here and there, but no more toe curling kisses. We still went to our pond and he even went with me to meet the first couple on my list. David and Sabrina Mitchell owned a dairy farm in new Hampshire, They have been married for 10 years. He's wife had gotten cervical cancer in her twenty's and had to have a hysterectomy. I liked them , Edward not so much. I loved the fact that the baby would grow up in a home filled with love and animals. He wanted to know who would taking care of child, while they were running the farm, since a farm is a lot of work. Then proceed to mentioned all the sickness's a child could come in contact with living on a farm. I just rolled my eyes. Kids have lived on farms for years. He was just nick picking. He asked about education and he hit the roof, when David suggested home schooling and started rambling how this child deserved nothing but the best education possible and dairy 101 would not get this child into college. I finally had to send him out and apologize for his behavior.

I didn't see him again for the rest of the day.

I had Esme meet with the next couple with me, later that week. I couldn't chance another situation like the one with the Mitchell's. Vivian and Denise Smith were been in a committed relationship and had been for years. They both were well educated and loved culture. Vivian was a music teacher and was a member of the Atlanta orchestra and Denise was a art professor. They have traveled and were extremely creative . I especially liked them. They weren't the typical conventional couple, but that didn't matter to me. I wanted the best for the child and so far Vivian and Denise seemed like the right choice.

I couldn't understand why Edward was acting so weird, I wanted to know why the sudden change in moods. He was giving me whiplash. I saw him in his office looking at paperwork. I knocked on the frame. He gave me a small smile and motioned for me to enter.

" Are you feeling well Isabella"

" What's with the Isabella shit"

He let out a huge breath and looked up at me.

" What can I help you with Bella"?

" I want to know why ,you are acting like this?"

" Bella, I am your doctor and while I feel a great deal of affection for you, what I done with you was a mistake. I should have been more sensitive to you and the reasons that you are here. I feel like I took advantage of you. My mother and your father are putting their trust in me to make sure that you and your child are taken care of and you are still young and I feel if I put myself more into your life, then I will be setting myself for heartache and corrupt you more then I have . You have your whole life ahead of you and I will not forgive myself if I interfered with your life anymore. We can be friends and I care about you more then one man should be allowed to, but I'm giving you a chance to live your life as you planned"

" I understand"

I turned and headed out the room, It felt as if my heart would break in a million different pieces. He was letting me go and I understood his reasons

Rosalie went into labor at 3 am on October 10th, during the first stage I laid in bed helping her breathing. I encouraged her telling her she was doing so well and she was. I could tell it was painful but Rosalie was a trooper. The adoptive parents were content on waiting on the birth in the living room. Emmett joined me on the other side of the bed with Rosalie. This was her moment to be surrounded with people who love and cared for her.

The beautiful cries of a little 8 pound and 4 ounce baby boy echoed in the room at 2 pm. He was so perfect , all ten fingers and toes. He barely had any hair but what little fuzz he had was blonde he's eyes were shaped like hers and they shared a nose. Emmett kissed her on her lips and told her he loved her, for a minute they looked like such a family. I gave her a hug and walked out the room and ran into Edward.

" You done a good job with Rosalie"

" Were you doubting my Doctor skills Miss Swan "

" No, of course not"

He looked lost in thought for a minute and turned back to me

" Its going to be hard for Rosalie to give her son up, she going to need you when the time comes, I want you to see first hand what's it going to be like, I want you to be prepared for what's to come. Mom said you liked the couple from Georgia"

" Yeah, they are well educated and believe in traditional school. I'm sure you would approve. One teaches music and one teaches art. They have a lot of love and just want to share it with a baby"

" They sound like good people" he tried to smile at me, but I knew it was fake. His eyes didn't show the same glimmer of happiness it did when I was with him at the pond a month ago.

Rosalie spent time with the baby, Emmett gushed on how he looked so much like her. The adoptive parents Mark and Shelby Platt decided to name Marcus Roland Platt. The middle name was after Rosalie. I knew the tears would come and they did, from all of us. Rosalie and Emmett bonded with Marcus for 3 days and since he was with her , he was going to be uncle Emmett.

The day Mark and Shelby came and took Marcus with them, it was a joyous and sad day. Rosalie and Emmett gave him a kiss goodbye and they left, as soon as the door closed she broke down. It took all of Emmett's strength to hold her up.

I took Edwards advice to heart, would I have the strength to give up my child, would I be able to cope. I knew right now I couldn't give this baby a good life, I just graduated high school. Vivian and Denise could provide so much more then I could right now. I decided that I wouldn't make any permanent decisions until I talked to my dad. He always had a level head when it came to things.

I tried calling my dad a few time, but always got the voice mail, It wasn't till a few days later that Edward called down for me to talk with him.

" Hey dad, How are things going"?

" I'm doing well, I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to talk with you, things have been quite hectic around here"

" have you found out what happened to James yet"

" Yea, that's why the station is pretty busy"

" Are you going to tell me"?

" Bella, Its complicated right now and I don't want to put under a lot of stress"

" Dad please, just tell me"

" Bells, James was murdered in his hospital room. The officer left his post for a minute and when he came back James was flat lining. His breathing tube was taken out and bag was used to suffocate him"

" You don't think Jacob did this do you"?

" No, He was out fishing with his father and I all morning and afternoon. I didn't even get the page from the station until after we came in. We found a note and box near where he laid at. You're going to find out anyway, There was a zip-lock bag with various women's panties and other items. There was a list of women with names, his method of rape and dates.

" How many were on the list"

" 10 women"

" Oh my god and what number was I" I said hopeful that I was the last one he assaulted.

" You were Number 9"

" There was someone after me, I feel so guilty dad, if I would have spoke up sooner then I could have prevented number 10"

"Bella, don't beat yourself up for this, we can't change the past, we all have to deal with what happened and make sure that James can't dictate our future. He can't have anymore control Bella."

" I met with 2 potential adoptive parents this week, It went well."

I proceeded to tell him about them. I noticed lately he took the same tone as Edward did when it came to the adoption. He had started calling the baby his grandbaby, staking a claim on it of some sort. The ultrasound pictures sat in a frame at the station and a few were on the fridge. I didn't know how to feel about my dad getting so attached to this baby. My dad couldn't care for an infant, He job was so demanding. It wouldn't be his responsibility to care for this child.

" Bella, I want you to do what's best for you and I will support you no matter what. I just want you to weigh your options, and understand that you have them. We are a family and Families stick together no matter what. I just want to understand that The Cullen's and I are here for you and don't rush into any decisions. You still have plenty of time."

Talking to my father gave me some perspective, what seemed like a cut and dry decision was just becoming more complicated by the minute.

AN: Edward has decided to take a step back and let Bella make a decision on where her future is headed. Bella is a big girl now and its time for her to come up with big girl solutions. How many of you are shocked that Mike isn't the killer? I want to say in advance how blessed I feel that you all have given this story a chance despite some misspelled words and punctuation errors. My Beta Hismysticmuse will be going through this and we will be fixing things along the way. She has a RL and is writing also, so patience is key

**Next Chapter : An unexpected proposition and Bella gets a visitor**

****Fangs****


	13. Chapter 13 The ties that bind

Chapter 13

_The ties that bind_

My sessions with Claire were going well. I was working out my feelings about my mother, the rape and all the events that happened after. There were no words to understand the absolute shock, then when I heard that James had assaulted 10 girls including me. I felt responsible for Jessica. I felt like I could have prevented hers.

Claire said its important to understand that I am not responsible for what happened to number 10, just like number 8 isn't responsible for me. I felt myself starting to heal a bit more everyday, James being dead and buried help with that peace of mind very much. Charlie went and tried to make contact with Mr. Newton and interview him but he was gone. He wasn't at the funeral either. The only people who bothered to show up were his mother and grandparents.

I cant begin to imagine what it takes to kill your own child, even if he was Satan himself. The only thing I could conclude was he did it out of anger, I wonder if now that some time had passed, that he regrets what he done.

Rosalie had just begun visitations with Marcus, She was still struggling with the adoption itself, but she says seeing him happy and healthy helps ease some of the pain. Emmett and her have become closer and spend a lot of time with each other. I am so happy that Rosalie has found happiness at last and she deserves it.

Victoria was doing really well, Therapy was good for her. She had decided to go back to school and excelled in her classes. A few days ago Victoria felt the need to get in touch with her parents. She let them know what happened, They apologized for what they done, but she couldn't accept it and let them know she had decided to stay here and that Esme was taking very good care of her.

Emily met with the adoptive parents her mother and father picked out. They were nice and Emily was satisfied knowing that her son was going to a family, that held the same traditions and culture she did. She said it made her feel closer to him. Emily expressed concern about going back home to Oklahoma, especially since the tribe elder she was involved with was also still there.

Alice and Jasper were very much in love and were preparing for their baby girl. The lifestyle she was used to as a child officially dried up, when she chose to go against her parents wishes and keep her child and continue to see Jasper. I know Alice was never happier and she didn't regret her decision, even if that meant she would be working for a living.

Edward and I were still in this awkward friendship phase. I still enjoyed my Mondays and he looked like he was in pain every time he had to touch me. This pissed me off greatly. I know I was small cow, but he didn't have to show that look on his face every time he came near me. I avoided him for the most part. I spent my time with the other girls. I even endured shopping so I wouldn't have to be near him. I had enough complications in my life and I didn't want to make Edward Cullen one of them. I was content on pretending the Edward thing didn't happen.

I completely understood where he was coming from. I am just glad we got this out of the way before I got my heart broke. I needed to work on me and sort my life. I admit the way he went about saying it was a bit harsh, but he was protecting him too. I didn't want him to regret what happened. I never felt he took advantage of me.

Today was a very exciting day. I was scheduled for another ultrasound and this time I would be able to find out the sex. I didn't really care what I had, Both sets of prospective adoptive parents had their preferences.

I really wanted my dad with me, when I found out. I would have asked Victoria or Rosalie to be with me, but I didn't want to seem insensitive to them. Alice was having lunch with Jasper and Emily was in class. Esme and Edward were having a staff meeting.

I tried to put on a brave face in front of Kate, but I cant hide my emotions well and she knew I felt alone in all this.

I exposed my ever expanding belly again to the warm gel, it was a nice soothing feeling. I watched as she roamed the wand over my stomach getting her required measurements. She was taking longer then she did last time. I was feeling uncomfortable after 20 minutes. I had to pee really bad and the pressure was making it worse. Kate had lost any trace of professionalism , now seriousness and worry marred her face.

" Kate is something wrong?"

" Um Bella, I'm going to need to stop and consult with Edward, Okay?"

She wiped the goo off and step out , leaving my mind to slip into an overwhelming panic. I was in full freak out mode by the time Edward came rushing in , His beautiful face showed he was just as concerned as I was

"Bella, baby you have to calm down a bit and relax, Kate just needs a 2nd opinion , I'm sure it's nothing, we just want to make sure"

He added more gel and put the wand back to my bump

I watched his face change from serious to worried to terrified. It was the last one that mirrored my own. It was brief and he looked at me smiling . I could tell it was all a mask.

" Well Bella, do you want know what you are having"

" Um, Yeah I guess"

"You are going to have one beautiful little…. Girl".

He showed me her little face and what looked like her thumb in her mouth

" I think she looks just like her momma" Edward said in a tone that only I could hear

He printed some pictures out and put some in his file and gave me four to me. I watched him take one for himself, I decided not to say anything to him. He was attached to this baby already. I felt bad, even though I never wavered from my decision to give the baby up for adoption.

" Bella, can I see you in the office when you get done here, I'll ask mom to join us so that your not uncomfortable being alone with me." Edward said in an unusual professional manner

I got myself together to meet Edward in his office, Esme was at the desk looking at my file when I came in. I sat on the couch and Edward came and sat beside me. Esme sat in front of us. Whatever happened in the ultrasound was weighing heavily not just on me, but them as well. I wanted to be excited about having a daughter, but I couldn't, not right now. I had no doubt once Alice got wind of it, We would be having some baby girl mission shopping expedition.

Edward Intertwined his hands in mine, I tried to resist at first , I didn't want Esme to have a reason to give Edward another talking too, after looking at Esme and seeing no warnings in her eyes I left my hands in his, he made me feel grounded and I had a feeling I was going to need this.

" Bella sweetheart, Kate and I have some concern with your ultrasound. The walls in your daughter's heart are not forming correctly. She has a defect on a valve on the left side and it's hindering her growth. She's a bit smaller then we would like to see in a normal 20 gestational fetus, She isn't in any distress right now, but I want you to see a pediatric cardiologist. I know some very excellent doctors in this field, Mom and I will set it up and I will go with you" .

I was floored, My daughter was sick, automatically I thought of Victoria, I didn't want to lose my daughter.

I couldn't even rejoice in what was suppose to be a special day. I couldn't let my self become excited about any of it. The only thing occupying my head was that I had to make sure I did everything possible to have a healthy child , which is why three days later I was sitting in the office of Dr. Eric Yorkie, a highly accomplished pediatric cardiologist.

They ran some test, done another ultrasound, the baby was still a girl and at the end of the day was told she was going to need extra special care. She will have to undergo surgery if she doesn't improve after about six months after birth. I would have to lower my stress and have the baby's heart monitored every few hours. I would have to increase my calories to see if her weight improved. It was a lot to take in. When I asked Dr. Yorkie, why this happened, He said a condition like this was hereditary then he asked if anyone on my side had heart problems. I said no and realized that this had to come from James's side. That fucker affected her even from the grave,

Later that evening, I had to call and let the two couples know what the specialist said, Upon hearing of the baby's condition . The Mitchell's pulled themselves from the prospective adoption citing they simply didn't have the insurance to cover the extensive medical care, she was going to have to receive and they were busy running a farm. I was disappointed but I understood. She was a special needs child and someone would have to dedicate their life to her on this level.

I was already in a somber mood when I called Vivian and Denise. They were rightfully concerned, but wanted to think on it a couple days and they would get back to me.

I grabbed a small bag of duck feed and made my way to the pond to think. I was there about an hour before I felt him. He pulled out his own feed bag and sat beside me.

" How are you feeling"

" Right now Edward, I'm a bit numb. I am sad that this baby will be sick. I'm hurt that the Mitchells didn't want my baby because of this. I mean life is about taking the good with the bad. Vivian and Denise want to think about it, but I'm sure they will decline to go further, Who's going to want a child like this?"

" I would" he said all seriousness, not a trace of humor in his face

" Edward, I don't think you know what you're saying, You don't have to do this out of pity, there is bound to be someone who wants a child and will love her despite the fact she is having some serious problems."

Bella, I know what I am saying, I'm a doctor, I know other Doctors, She would get the best possible care. My inheritance from my father would cover her medical cost 100 times fold, besides what child wouldn't want Esme as a grandmother and the best part is that I'll always have a piece of you with me. I thought I would become a dad, the more conventional way, but I know I could be a good dad Bella"

" You would be an excellent father. Are you sure you want her despite the fact she's going to need a lot of care? I don't want you to offer this out of pity. I could always start in interview process again. What would Esme say?"

" She knows, She waiting in the kitchen a nervous wreck waiting on your answer, and I want her, somewhere in the back of my mind I realized I always wanted her especially since you were determined to give her up. I respect your decision and I want you to know that when you the time comes and school is over, we would be right here waiting for you to come home to us, if that's what you wanted."

I sat up on my knees, laid the feed in the grass, the ducks immediately took this as a free for all buffet . I grabbed Edward hands and put them in mine. The tears had already started to flow uncontrollably. I put his hands on my belly

" Edward Cullen, would you do me the great honor in being her father?"

She must of loved that idea, since she took this opportunity to kick me for the first time and in the palm of his left hand.

Edward looked up from his hands in amazement, He's eyes glistening in unshed tears

" I would love nothing more then to be her Daddy"

**AN: this chapter was promised on Saturday and I failed… sorry RL was hellish busy. I will be moving next Saturday Feb. 4****th**** so my update will be later also… next chapter will have the visitor and thanksgiving with Charlie and the rest of Cullen House.. And he's reaction to Edward adopting the baby by himself…**

**We Love a future Grandma Esme! **


	14. Chapter 14 the heart wont lie

Chapter 14

The heart won't Lie

**November**

My life was now routine. I woke in the mornings, got dressed, Edward would come in the room, check my blood pressure and her heart rate. I went to group, had lunch. He checked heart rate again and on days I had counseling with Claire, Edward now went with me. I spent evenings hooked to a monitor while I had dinner and activity. Edward wanted me to sleep with one with an alarm, but I convinced him that would be too uncomfortable for me to do so.

Alice was over the moon about finding out we were having girls together and I had to put the brakes on the girls shopping trip. She wanted to know why and I told her that Edward was adopting my daughter and that it would be up to him to decide what he wants to get her. She was happy that she would grow up here, but concerned about me and wanted to know my plans. I told her that they haven't changed, I was still going to school next fall.

Esme was just gushing at the thought of being the grandmother. She constantly thanked me for the opportunity and that it just seemed like fate that brought us all together, Elizabeth, Esme, Edward and I. I know she will have a wonderful home and the most capable, loving father and supportive family.

Edward and I have obviously gotten closer, I couldn't deny in my heart that I had feelings for him. Rosalie says I must be blind if I didn't see the love in Edward's eyes when he looked at me. That word scared me… Love. I knew what it felt like for my father to love me and for me to love him, but romantic love was very foreign to me. I read Romeo and Juliet in school and even attended a play in Seattle. I was convinced Shakespeare was fucking crazy. Fate and destiny was for love poems and movies. It had no part in real life. I did think about how different Edward was with me then the rest of the girls, we did share kisses and one unforgettable birthday, Maybe Rosalie had a point.

When Edward made his case about wanting to adopt the baby, I pretended that I didn't hear the part, where he said that I had the choice of coming back here when school was finished. I didn't know how to respond to that, He was complicating my plans that's for sure. I didn't expect to feel these things and he was making me 2nd guess my every decision. Next fall was a long time from now and I had time to figure things out. Right now my focus was making sure this baby lived and had a chance at a wonderful life. I come to terms with this pregnancy and I hated how she was conceived but I couldn't deny I loved her. Edward Loved her, because she was a part of me.

Edward and I stayed home for Halloween. I didn't want anyone mistaken my big belly for a pumpkin, so we stayed in and watch horror movies, which are not my favorite but were Edwards. We had a Friday the 13th marathon. Am I the only one who thought Jason X was the stupidest movie ever? We sat on the couch, he propped my feet on his lap and every now and then he would rub my belly. She was much more active now. She seemed to calm when he touched her. I think she was claiming him as hers around the same time he claimed her as his.

He would be her daddy and he had every right to touch his daughter and feel her move when he felt like it. I admit I love having him touch me. The tingles he sent through my body were becoming addictive and if I could get that feeling under the guise of him showing affection to his daughter then so be it.

Emily was due next month, around thanksgiving. She was increasingly more uncomfortable. Her small little frame was doing its best to accommodate that big boy. Her 17th birthday was also in November and I was glad she would be here with us with people who loved and cared for her. Emily was doing excellent in school. She was on the fast track to graduate early. If there is one thing that I admired about Emily, its that she was headstrong and determined to follow her dreams.

She didn't want to make a huge deal over it. Mrs. Cope made her a German chocolate cake and her favorite meal, Pepperoni pizza with pineapples . Edward and Alice scoffed at the combination at first and said fruit played no part in a good pizza, It took one bite for them to change their mind. Emily's parents called her and wished her a Happy Birthday. They mentioned nothing of the baby.

The news about Edward adopting the baby and her condition spread like wild fire. Everyone was concerned. Rosalie and Victoria were there for me when I finally felt like I was able to cry. I cried for her, I cried because of my feelings for Edward, I cried cause she was going to have the life I envisioned for her. They just held me and told me everything was going to work out. It meant a lot coming from them, they had both survived very difficult events in their lives and if they could make it, I knew I could to. I was just getting over my crying session with the girls when Edward walked in holding the monitor

" What's wrong?, why is Bella crying"

Rosalie broke from our embrace and smiled at Edward

" Dr. Cullen for such a smart doctor, you are a clueless man" Rosalie said in a tone laced with humor

" What did I miss"

" Nothing Edward, I am pregnant and sometimes pregnancy makes you cry, I'm guessing it's the hormones wouldn't you agree?"

" I suppose you're right Bella, Um .. It's time we monitor the baby for a little while.

I laid on the bed, and watched while glided the straps across my abdomen and positioned the fetal monitor just below my belly button. His fingers lightly touched the bare skin of my tummy and he let them linger there for a few seconds more then necessary. He has touched my belly before but never bare skin. He always felt her kick over clothing. I looked up at him and he was staring at me, He emotions so blank. The tingling sensation was amplified and I definitely felt a connection to him and I knew it had nothing to with the baby.

" Do you feel it" He asked

" yeah, I do" I responded in a whisper, I don't think I could have found my voice even if I wanted to.

" Bella, I think we need to talk."

"Okay, What do you want to talk about" I said with apprehension, I was beginning to worry that maybe the baby condition was to much and he changed his mind. I started to panic and heard the beeping noise accelerate and knew it was mine.

" Bella sweetheart, I am going to need you to calm down, Its not good for you or the baby"

" I knew it was too good to be true, You don't want her anymore, you realize just how much care she is going to need and you cant handle it, It's going to be next to impossible to find someone who would want to have a child with health problems. My dad and I don't have the money to give her the proper care. I don't know what I'm going to do"

My rant was abruptly cut off by Edwards lips on mine. They were still as soft as I remembered and I couldn't help but moan and pull him towards me on the bed . He wrapped his hand across my back. My shirt was still lifted a bit from the monitors. He moved his hands along my side until I felt a finger brush against my nipple. I moaned even louder.

His mouth found purchase on my neck and he began to lightly nibble along my collar bone.

I didn't want to stop, but I knew we had to talk and we were just prolonging the inevitable.

" Edward, you have to stop"

" Bella, I didn't hurt you did I"

" No, but we need to talk, like you said"

He sighed and removed his hands from my flesh. I felt the loss immediately . But I knew I can only think straight, when he wasn't to close to me. I sat up against the headboard and he moved further down to the end of the bed.

" I want you to know I have not and will not ever change my mind about being her daddy. I want her so much. She is mine in every way that matters. But I don't think its fair to you if I kept the other things I've been holding in. I know it wont make a difference to you, but I need you to know how I feel about you. I don't want you to change your life, I want to give you options"

" Edward, I don't have options"

" Yes, you do, just hear me out"

" Isabella Swan, I am in love with you. I tried to fight it and distance myself and I don't have the strength to stay away from you anymore. I know it seems like the last couple months have been an emotional rollercoaster ride with you. I am so sorry that I made you feel that way. The real me is undeniably in love with you, The real me never wants to see you leave, The real me wants you to stay with us and be this baby's mother."

" I can't stay Edward"

" Why"

" You know I have a scholarship in the fall to another school"

" There are schools in Arizona"

" I don't have a free ride to schools in Arizona"

" I will pay for it"

" No, absolutely not!"

" You can look into scholarships here, You're not leaving for awhile, Arizona has so much to offer you then you think, you said it yourself it feels like home here, and it feels like home when I am around you, You are my home, remember that journal I gave you?"

" yes"

The translation on the cover says " Your heart is my new home"

The tears I couldn't seem to keep at bay anymore seemed to over flow. He was trying to tell me even then that he was in love with me.

"Edward?'

"Yes, Bella" His beautiful face was streaked with his own tears, I had never in my life seen a man cry and the thought that I had anything to do with those tears upset me even more.

" I love you too"

" You do?" Edward smile was contagious and I began to smile also

" Yes, Edward I do, It scares me, I had never been in love or a real relationship. I know that these strong feelings I have go beyond the normal affection one would have for a friend. My heart aches when your not around and I feel this pull towards you. I will look into scholarships and schools in Arizona and you're right this feels like my home, you feel like my home. I cant promise I will be able to stay. I love my daughter, It's taken awhile to feel affection towards her, but when we got the news of her condition all I done was pray for her and I cant imagine my life without her in it. That being said, I know nothing of being a mother to her, My own mother was terrible and I don't want to be like that to her"

" Bella, You could never be that cruel to your daughter, Your heart doesn't have an ounce of malice in it"

" I can be mean when I want to be"

" I doubt that, but thank you for giving us a chance, Thank you for even considering staying and going to school and one day our daughter will thank you for being her mother"

I was a bit shocked when he called the baby "ours", It was a step to what felt right, We felt right.

The weeks leading up to Thanksgiving I felt that things changed with Edward and I. We spent a lot of time together. I went with Edward shopping for a few baby things, Alice insisted that time was wasting and that the baby was going to be here and Edward wouldn't have anything, He tried to assure her that his daughter would have everything he needed and on time. We went anyway to get away from Alice and her nagging.

The moment Jasper got an apartment for them, the first room to be done was the nursery. Alice would be living three miles from Cullen home, I would miss her, but I know she will stay close by.

Edward, Esme and the rest of the house had officially met Emmett. They all liked him, He was so right for Rosalie. She brought us pictures of baby Marcus. He looks just like Rosalie and that fact both made her happy and sad at the same time. She was thankful that there was very little Royce king in his features. His blonde hair had a bit of curl at the ends and his eyes were Caribbean blue. Rosalie was always happier after a visit. She had pictures of all three of them together in her room. She was made to be a mother and I know the next time will be the right time for her.

Edward bought all the baby furniture he needed for her. The nursery would be decorated when I was further along. He tried several times to ask my input of what I liked. I couldn't bring myself to pick. She would be Edward's daughter and it was only fair for him to do this. His choice was a white crib that turned into a toddler bed and later on to a full size bed. He bought the matching diaper changer and rocker. The crib was fit for a princess. The canopy on top was a beautiful touch.. He didn't buy any clothes, just the basic essentials like swing and car seat.

Edward and I met with Jane, who was handling the adoption. She went over a basic outline. He was going to be her main provider and retain sole custody and right now we are entering in an open adoption. I promised I would look into what a college down here has to offer and I will, I wasn't keeping my hopes up and thought it would be easier to carry on without thinking of the fact we both declared our love for one another. James's death proved to make the adoption easier. A dead man couldn't be granted custody. If by some chance I could work things out and possibly stay in Arizona then the adoption will be modified.

Esme was all excited about Thanksgiving. Some of the former residents were coming. I knew Claire and her daughter Tanya were attending. A woman name Stephanie and her family. She was a successful author here in the phoenix. Then we have Rosalie ,Emmett, Alice, Jasper, Emily, Victoria and of course my dad said he would be here. I was so excited to see him. Thanksgiving tradition at the Swan household always ended up taking a trip to the Chinese restaurant My mother cant cook for shit, that would require getting her hands dirty…. And Renee never gets her hands dirty.

I was thankful that she never contacted me again.

The day before Thanksgiving was when my dad was due to arrive in Arizona. My relationship with him was stronger then ever, telling my dad about my daughters illness was hard. I wanted to wait till I saw him, but he noticed a change in our conversations and I had to spill everything to him. We spent the rest of our phone call in tears. I was going to wait till he got here to tell him about Edward adopting my baby. My dad loves Edward and he knows I am safe here with him and Esme.

I was laying in my room attached to my fetal monitor when I heard a soft knock on my door.

"Bells?"

I turned around to see Jacob at the door holding a pink teddy bear

" Oh My God ! I cried

" Jake, My dad didn't tell me you were coming"

" He wanted to surprise you"

He walked over and sat on the end of my bed. He had gotten a lot bigger in the 6 months since I last saw him. Jake's hair was also longer.

Jake embraced me in a tight hug. He was so warm and my little piece of forks here in the flesh.

" Where is Dad.?"

" He is talking with your doctor, then he should be on his way up, so what is the machine for?"

" The baby has a defect with her heart and she has to be monitored to make sure its not causing her to go into distress?"

" So your having a girl huh.?, what are you going to name her?"

" Its not up to me what I name her Jake, its up to the person who adopts her"

" Do you want to go threw with the adoption?"

" Its not a matter if I want to, Its what is best for her. I have school, Charlie and I aren't financially capable of taking care of a sick child, but I am going to look at what I can do to maybe going to school in Arizona to be close to her"

" I am so glad to see you Bells, I've missed you so much. I want you to know that I am so proud of you for coming forward and telling Charlie what happened. I don't regret what I done to James. I'm glad he is dead and even more happy that it had nothing to do with me."

" I didn't want this whole mess to burden other people in their lives and it has and I cant help but to feel guilty about it."

" Don't blame yourself Bells, The blame rests on the sick bitch rotting in hell right now. We are practically family and that's what family does, we help each other, when one hurts we all hurt, it's that simple"

" I could never thank you enough for being there for me, I don't want to think about where I would be if u hadn't answered and came when I called"

" You're safe now and that makes up for everything"

" I keep thinking about the others and what they must be going through"

" Its natural, I assume"

My heart ached so bad, the pain that had been buried for so long was starting to resurface. I could easily blamed this on hormones, but it wasn't. I was starting to heal and that meant I had to feel, I could no longer remain numb. Jacob laid behind me on the bed, softly rubbed my head as I let it all out.

I was startled when a loud bang came from the door frame

I jumped up to see a very angry Rosalie, seething and ready to pounce.

**Epov**

I was going to be a father….

My heart was filled with so much love for Bella and the baby. I wasn't going to force her to stay in Arizona if she didn't want to. I didn't want her to stay out of obligation but to stay because she loved me and wanted to be a mother to our daughter.

I wanted to let her know she had options, that she had people who were willing to move heaven and earth to be there for her and support her. It was only fair. I wanted her to live out her dreams, I knew before giving her my heart that her plan was to leave and go to college. I tried to resist and guard my heart. I couldn't avoid her anymore.

It was decided that nothing as far as the adoption would change. Things would go as planned and if she stayed, then we would cross that road when we got there.

Esme told anyone who would listen that she was going to be a grandmother. She wore that title with honor. Thanksgiving was a major holiday here at Cullen house. Mrs. Cope and my mom worked days in advance to get ready. We always had some of the past residents here. It was a time for family and to be thankful for what we have. This year I was extra thankful. We always felt that anyone who past threw these doors would always be considered family.

Charlie mentioned to me that he would be bringing Jacob Black with him. He was a family friend and the person who was there for her after the rape. I will always be grateful for him and for what he done for Bella. She could have no truer friend.

When they arrived, Jacob introduced himself and I shook his hand and welcomed Charlie and him to Cullen House after a few moments of small talk he asked where Bella was and I told him upstairs then he sprinted up to her room. I knew her dad would want a more detailed update in the baby's condition and how His daughter was doing so we went to my office for a bit more privacy.

" So how she doing Edward and how serious is the baby's defect?"

Charlie, I wont lie to you, Its serious. The right side of her heart is having to pump harder to make up for the weak left side muscle. The baby doesn't seem to be in distress and besides being a bit on the small size, she is doing very well. She will need a lot of care and eventually need surgery to repair it. Bella is a bit shocked at the news but is doing everything I and the cardiac surgeon is asking of her. She is monitored regularly and increasing her food intake.

" Bella told me that she has found two families that she likes to adopt, How are they taking the news"

It was then that I knew. Bella hasn't mentioned that I would be adopting the baby and that the other families have withdrew their application.

" The others have decided to not adopt her baby, after hearing how much care she is going to need"

" Well that's fucking bullshit, if they wanted to be parents, it wouldn't have mattered to them, being a parent means taking the good as well as the bad"

" Charlie , I don't know if Bella wanted me to tell you, but I asked to adopt the baby and we have decided to go through with it. I love the baby very much and will see to it that she gets the best care available."

He looked at me with a concerned expression. He started to open his mouth in response when the door flew open and Victoria was bent over trying to catch her breath.

" Edward!…. You have to get up to Bella's room… Rosalie has that boy…. Cornered"

Charlie and I ran out the office and up the stairs

Bella was on the bed crying and Rosalie had Jacob pinned on the wall

" Who are you? and what were you doing to Bella"! Rosalie was shouting

" Rosalie.. Its okay. That's Jacob. He came with Bella's dad .. He wouldn't hurt her, they are friends"

I put my hand on her shoulder and she relaxed and pulled her back towards me.

" I heard her crying and saw some strange boy on her bed, I'm sorry Jacob. I didn't mean to scare you but please see this from my point of view"

" I understand Blondie, it's okay"

" My name is Rosalie. Bella I am so sorry, I didn't mean to make up upset

By now everyone had heard the commotion and was standing in Bella's room

" The shows over and lunch is on the table, Rosalie and Bella come join us when you to get yourselves together" My mother didn't want this to blow out of proportion and food was a great distraction.

Lunch was almost over when Bella and Rosalie came to join us. They seemed to be in a better mood. I loved to see her smile. It was contagious and I could help but to smile with her. I could feel Charlie's eyes on me. I looked at him just enough time to catch him staring at me.

Bella went over to her dad and hugged him

"I missed you so much daddy, thank you for bringing Jake, It was a nice surprise"

The later it got the more busy the house was. Everyone was scrabbling to help Mrs. Cope and mom in the kitchen. Bella felt a little guilty for not being able to help to much. The only thing Emily could do was peel vegetables. And anything else that required a chair. She was already 2cm dilated at her last checkup and 60 percent effaced.

It didn't take long before Emily and Jacob struck up a friendship. Its had been awhile since I last saw her smile and He made her smile.

I was in my office catching up on some paperwork. I made myself scarce so that Bella and Charlie could have some father - Daughter time together. I was lost in thought thinking about when I would get to bond with my own Daughter, when Charlie came in the office.

He looked at me and I could see a storm of emotions brewing in his face.

I didn't want to be the one to speak first

I watched him put his hands in the pockets of his jeans, He rocked on his heels a couple times

" So, when did you fall in love with my Daughter?"

**AN: I have moved and we are getting settled. I should have internet at home very soon, bare with me. I thank each and every one for your reviews. I love hearing your stories, believe me I cry right along with you. Next chapter…. A declaration of love, A time for Thanks and a birth of a baby****J. I am on Facebook. My name is insertfangshere. I post pic teases and updates.**


	15. Chapter 15 Thankful Blessings

Chapter 15

_I was in my office catching up on some paperwork. I made myself scarce so that Bella and Charlie could have some father - Daughter time together. I was lost in thought thinking about when I would get to bond with my own Daughter, when Charlie came in the office._

_He looked at me and I could see a storm of emotions brewing in his face._

_I didn't want to be the one to speak first_

_I watched him put his hands in the pockets of his jeans, He rocked on his heels a couple times_

" _So, when did you fall in love with my Daughter?"_

The shock must have registered on my face. I wasn't prepared to have this conversation with Charlie. He trusted me with his daughter and he is going to think that I took advantage of her.

" Mr. Swan, I assure you it is not what you think"

" Edward, it's a simple yes or no. Did you or did you not in the time she has been at Cullen house fall in love with my daughter"

" I wont lie to you, Yes sir I have, I am in love with Bella, but I need to clarify. I did not realize these feelings until after her birthday and I have not acted upon my affection for her outside a kiss"

_Did you think I was going to admit that I licked his daughter's pussy on her birthday? I don't have a death wish people_

Charlie took a seat by the bookcase, The one I had her up against that night. I had to shake myself of the memories especially while talking to Charlie

" I know you're a good man Edward and It shows by wanting to be a father to a child that's not biologically yours. I seen the way you look at her, I know you care for her almost as much as I do, but I want you to understand, I want things for her. You will be a father soon, you will know what it feels like to want more for your child then you do yourself. Bella has dreams that I want her to achieve, I don't want her to sacrifice any more then she was forced to already. I know she loves her daughter, I'm concerned about the fact that she is willing to throw Dartmouth away to play house with you. She worked so hard, but I love Bella and will support her in anything she decides. I'm not so sure how I feel about some twenty something year old Doctor moving in on his eighteen year old patient especially one with her history."

The way Charlie said it, It did make me sound like some sexual deviant , who's only reason for choosing this particular profession was so that I could get women. He had to understand how I feel for Bella.

"Charlie, I would never hurt Bella and because I know her history I am very cautious of where her and I are headed. I don't want her to sacrifice her dreams, I only wanted to give her an option to stay here. She has found a second family here, She has bonded with all of us. I worry about what being away from her child would do to her especially since she is aware of her condition. I wanted her to know that no matter what her daughter would be loved and cared for and if she still wanted to leave next September, then I would let her go. Bella has a support system that no offense to you, that she lacked in Washington. She thinks of Esme as a second mom and everyone one of these ladies here as sisters, and if she could still have that, go to school and be with her daughter well if I could provide that for her then I would., Its just up to Bella to accept it. I thought about the age difference also and the fact I am still her OB, I love your daughter and I would wait as long as she wanted me to. She is worth it to me"

" I respect your honesty Edward, but of course I would say if your hurt her, I would kill you, but judging today from what happened to Jacob, That girl Rosalie could take you down quicker then I could."

" Yes sir, I would gladly take any punishment seen fit, if I ever hurt her"

He nodded and walked back out the door. I let out a shaky breath that I was all too aware that I was holding. I had yet to say how I felt about Bella outside of just Bella and I. I was scared of being a disappointment to her. I knew if I hurt that wonderful angel in the living room. I would have a house full of people to contend with and more then half of them were hormonal women.

**BPOV**

"I'm going to look at some schools here in Arizona dad"

"Why would you do that?. The plan was for you to go to Dartmouth next fall"

" That was before I got attached to the baby"

" and Dr Cullen"

" Dad, before you start thinking the worse please understand that Edward has been nothing but wonderful to me. He would never hurt me. He would never take advantage of me. I am in love with him. He has agreed to adopt this baby and see that she is loved and has the best care. We didn't expect to fall in love in the process. Edward doesn't want me to change my plans. He just wanted me to see that I had options and if I can go school ,live my dreams and be able to see my child grow up. It will be a good thing for me.

"You have a chance to have a free education at Dartmouth, How are we going to pay for another school"

" Dad, Lets not worry about that right now, I'm going to look into some scholarships and see what I can do"

" I just want you happy Isabella, You deserve it so much and I love you"

"Love you too Daddy"

Thanksgiving was starting off better then any other in my existence. I woke this morning with Edward standing over me with a tray of breakfast of eggs over medium, hash browns with onion and cheese, and a bowl of strawberries and grapes

" What do I owe this honor"?

" Besides being the mother of my daughter and the love of my life"

" Yeah, cause those come around everyday, don't they?" I said in a non chalet manner.

He put the tray over my lap and bent down and kissed me. It was slow, sweet and every ounce of affection could be felt through out my body.

"Well that's a way to start a holiday" he murmured against my lips,

" When did Mrs. Cope find the time to fix this along with Thanksgiving"

" I made this, everyone else had oatmeal and cereal, but you needed to have a full meal"

My breakfast in bed was awesome, Edward put me back on the monitor while I ate. We talked about Charlie and what it meant for him to know how we felt about one another. It was relief that I didn't feel like I was keeping anything from him. Jacob and Leah were getting along quite well. He would get up and get her something to drink. I could tell he was quite smitten with her. He knew she was young, but they connected into a special friendship.

Dinner was scheduled to be at five. The first person to arrive was Emmett, He got along with my dad very well since they were both in law enforcement. Miss Claire came in holding a stack of Kentucky pound cakes and just like that Edward left my side. I went and sat beside Emily and Jacob who seemed to be involved in a deep discussion

" I see you have met Jacob, Emily"

' Yeah, He's been real nice to me"

Jacob excused himself to see what my dad was up too, They shared a look and I could see a smile rise across her face

" So you like Jacob"

" I do, He's real nice to talk too, He understands my culture even though he is from another tribe. We got to talking and our tribes have a long standing history together, they were allies back in the day. I hope to have a close friendship with him. He makes me feel normal, like less of an outcast"

" Jacob is one of the best men you could ever know. Did he tell you he was the one who took care of me after I was attacked?"

" No, He just said that you were special to him. I thought that maybe he was like a boyfriend or something"

" He's like a brother to me, I owe him my life. He deserves to be happy and so do you"

I gave her a hug and went to see where Edward had run off to , before I could find him Esme caught up with me and wanted me to meet out other guests

I met a former resident named Stephanie . She had a daughter here when she was 16. She now wrote a line of very successful children's books, She liked that I also had a flair for writing and wanted to see the short stories that Victoria and I wrote together. I told her I would ask Vic and let her know.

Teresa Russo had also given birth here to a set of twins boys when she was 18. She owned a daycare that was affiliated with Cullen House.

They all loved Esme and looked up to her as a mother, I know she loved what she done here and thought of us all as her children.

I had just finished talking to Teresa , when I felt Edwards hand reach across my hips and rub the baby. She moved so much now, It was an experience to feel. I felt his lips kiss the top of head., any anxiety I felt about today were calmed by just one touch of his hand. We stayed there in this embrace, relishing in the moment. We had never done this in front of anyone, so in a way it's a bit like our coming out party.

" How are you feeling, you haven't been running around here since I've been gone, have you?" I laid my head back against his chest

" No, Esme introduced me to some of the former residents and its not like I'm going to be jogging up the stairs, give me some credit"

" I do, you cant blame me for looking after my girls"

" and you do an great job at it, so don't worry"

Edward gave me a small peck on the lips

" isn't that the most precious sight you have ever saw Claire, Esme said teary eyed

" Yes it is momma Esme, young love is always precious"

" Bella, I wanted you to meet my daughter Tanya" Claire said

" Hi Tanya"

Tanya was beautiful, She was taller then her mother and had a reddish tint to her blonde hair. Her eyes were a darker shade of blue then Rosalie. She seemed very nice

" Hi, Bella. Its nice to meet you Mom and Momma Esme has said nothing but nice things about you, I have to tell you Momma Esme is so excited about being a grandmother, it has my own mother getting the itch. I'm no where near ready to have my own"

" I have no doubt this baby will be loved and cared for more so then any child I have known and Esme will make an excellent grandmother, since she was a phenomenal mother to Edward and every woman that came here"

" I agree she is a saint, I don't know what my mother or any other girl would have done without her, It was really great growing up here. It helped that Edward and I were the same age. We done everything together

I looked at Edward when she seemed to emphasize the word "everything". There was a glimpse of anger in his face . It softened when he looked at me.

" It was the same as it would be in any other brother/sister relationship, we fought constantly , it got on our mothers nerves"

" Oh Edward I wouldn't say we had a brother/sister relationship, there are certainly some things we done that would be taboo if that was the case"

Esme walked in and announced it was time for dinner.

I couldn't help but feel as if there was more to Tanya and Edward relationship. That was before me, so I really couldn't feel like he done anything to me. I loved Claire, she was a great therapist, I was starting to feel that maybe the things I said to Claire was a conflict of interest cause of her close relation to Cullen House. I cant well complain to the mother that her daughter makes me uncomfortable because of a maybe intimate relationship with my new boyfriend . I will have to talk to Edward about changing therapists.

I couldn't help but smile, when I sat down. It was nice to see everyone so close. It felt like how a real family was suppose to feel, everyone hugged, talked and shared pictures, numbers.

"Those of you, who have been here to have thanksgiving with us before knows we have a Tradition here at Cullen House. We each go around and say what we are thankful for this year" Esme said

Claire, Stephanie and Teresa were all thankful for family and friends

Jake was thankful for new friends, Family and finally completing restoration on his beloved 1969 Chevy Camaro.

Dad was thankful that he had a second chance to be the dad he should have been. That shocked me because Charlie isn't an emotional person and for him to speak his heart was moving to me. He mouthed the words " I love you" and I replied the same back

Emily said she would be thankful when this kid jumped out of her, then proceeded to poke at her belly. Everyone laughed

Jasper said he was thankful that he got a another chance to be with the love of his life and couldn't wait for his daughter to be here

Alice who was wearing another one of her shirts. This one was brown and said "_Back away, I'm not the turkey". _She was thankful for a chance to be a mother , to be with Jasper and the fact _Baby Gap_ was having a huge sale on black Friday

Emmett was thankful for Rosalie walking into his life and for being at the Carnival to met her

Rosalie had tears in her eyes at Emmett's declaration. She was thankful that Marcus had wonderful parents and that she and Emmett are allowed to be with him, when they want. And for finding love, when she felt she didn't deserve it.

Victoria said even though this year wasn't quite the best for her, she knew things happen for a reason and she was happy to be back in school and thankful she had a wonderful people here that love and support her

Tanya was thankful for her new promotion at work and the chance to reacquaint herself with old friends, now that she had moved back to phoenix

I felt Edward give me a reassuring squeeze on my leg under the table. He turned to me and looked at me like I was the only one in the room, His fingers brushed against my cheek and he held my hand

" _I am thankful this year that I had the privilege to meet and fall in love with a woman who besides my mother is the most unselfish and loving person I have ever met. I am constantly in awe of her strength and I am Thankful that she is making me a father. I promise I will be the best father I could possibly be and that she wont regret that she gave her to me for one second, Thank you Bella Swan"_

My heart swelled at his beautiful words. My damn hormones had again gotten the best of me and I silently let the tears flow.

" _Wow, How does anyone come back from that?, please excuse the tears it's the hormones. I am thankful for so much. I'm thankful for my dad for making an effort to help me through this, Jacob for making it possible that I am even here, Esme for being the being the mother I needed, Rosalie, Alice, Victoria, and Emily for being my sisters and always reassuring me that I am never alone. I am so thankful that I met Edward, not only has he been a friend to me, he showed me I was worthy of so much more then I realized. He loves me without fail and conditions. I'm eternally thankful that this baby will have the kindest and the most protective daddy ever. She will never have to doubt his love for her. I love you too Edward Cullen"_

He leaned over and started to kiss me with a little bit more passion then before when Esme cleared her throat

" Well I will make this short. I am as always thankful for Carlisle, may he rest in peace, for giving me some wonderful years and making Cullen home a reality. I am thankful that this place got to help so many ladies. This year I'm thankful that my son has come home and is following his fathers legacy and that he has seen fit to make me a grandmother, if I hadn't mentioned to any of you before"

Everyone laughed in response cause we all indeed were well aware of how proud she was about this

"okay lets eat"

(-)

My dad and Jacob left to go back to forks two days later. It was sad to see them go. I could tell Jacob and Emily were quite smitten with one another. I did have a talk with him to make sure he knew that he had to be patient with her, if he wanted any kind of relationship with her. He told me Emily explained her situation and he understood that with her he needed to go slow with her and told me she was worth it to him.

Emily's emotions were all over the place after Jacob left. I would lay with her till she fell asleep and then move to my room. I had done this for the next four days. On Wednesday December 1st I was feeling so awful and wore out, When I went I went to lay in bed with her. I think I may have fallen asleep even before she did

I woke later and my pajama pants were all wet.

I shot up out of the bed,

This can't be happening

It was too soon

I ran down the stairs

I had to get to Edward

I didn't even bothering to knock on his door. I ran in and screamed his name

He sat up

" Bella, baby come to bed"

"No, damn it ! I think my water broke"

" Oh God no!" he cried

Edward jumped out of bed and rushed over to me, It was then I knew that Dr. Cullen slept in the nude. He felt my pants and sure enough they were soaked in fluid

" Are you in any pain?"

" No, none I was feeling a bit nauseous when I fell asleep in Emily's bed and I woke up all wet"

"Where were you"? he asked curiously

" Um, in Emily's room, why?"

" Bella, I don't think it's you, I think it was Emily's"

As soon as he said it , it dawned on me. I didn't even check on her. I know she was still asleep. Who breaks their water and sleeps through it, Its not mine and I woke up

The sound of the medical alarm in Edward's room brings me out of my internal thoughts

We go up to Emily's room to see her laying on her side, panting and moaning in pain. I watch Edward as he checked her and told her that she had practically slept through most of it. She had reached 8cm , but soon it was hitting her hard. Edward gave her a shot to take the edge off of her pain

Three hours later Emily delivered a beautiful little boy with russet colored skin and a head full of black hair. The adopted parents were naming him Dakota Lee. He weighed at 8 pounds 15 ounces and was 21 inches long

Everyone was still so exhausted afterwards, Esme stayed with Emily and the baby. The couple weren't due in Arizona till the weekend. Emily would be going back a week later. I wasn't looking forward to say bye to her.

Edward brought me to his bed. He put on some sweat pants, much to my disappointment we laid in his big comfortable bed , my head resting on his chest listening to the sound of hi heart

"I don't think I have ever been as scared as I was when I thought it was you in labor, all I could think about was it being too soon and the thought that we could lose her, as if she doesn't already have a strike going against her with her condition"

" Edward, I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you worry, I panicked" .

" I know, it just got me thinking, I don't think I could stand to see you in pain, how can I be an impartial doctor when you go into labor knowing the woman I love is going to deliver my child. How can I turn off my emotions to be professional, what if I screw something up and my actions harm anyone of you. It would kill me"

" Edward, everything is going to be fine, you're a great Doctor and wonderful man. I have no doubt when the time comes you will do everything to make sure we are both safe, quit worrying."

" you're right Bella, I'm just worrying over nothing"

My mind went back to that image if Edward in bed with no clothes on. I could feel my body start to flush with warmth all over remembering, His body was muscular but not overdone, just enough that I could feel every dip and ridge along them. I ran the palm of my hand along his stomach. He slightly shivered when my hand reach dangerously close to the waist of his sweatpants I would be lying if I didn't admit to momentarily catching a glimpse at his penis when I came in the room earlier. I didn't have anyone to base it on, but judging by my instincts when we finally got around to making love, I was going to be a well satisfied woman…Mr. rabbit wont have shit on Mr., Cullen.

" So do you always sleep nude Edward"?

" Go to sleep Bella"

**AN: ****We have another baby. If you have a face book acct., I post pic teasers. On my fan fiction page under the name Insertfangshere. I will post a picture of little Dakota and Marcus since those are the babies that have been born so far. Next chapter will entail A ring…. A new girl and the return of the bitch Renee, How bad do you want to know that's all about? I want to Thank everyone for your reviews, I feel blessed and eternally grateful that you gave this story a chance even with the errors. In case you are wondering I had a relative who pretty much slept through her water breaking, her husband thought he pissed himself. I am proud to say that I have reached 300 reviews on twcs and I'm allll most there on .**

**Hugs and loves **

**Fangs***


	16. Chapter 16 Bad Company

Chapter 16 - Bad CompanySong Inspiration: What I've Overcome -Fireflight

December

Claire was very understanding when I told her that she couldn't be my therapist. I didn't sugarcoat my reasons. I just said that I didn't think she could be impartial to me cause of her and her daughters connection with Cullen House. She told me she would never jeopardize my confidence and tried to reassure me that things said aren't disclosed, Even though her reaction disappointed me, I had to look after myself.

Siobhan Banner, was an understanding caring woman who specialized in treating people effected by traumatic situations. She'd been born in Brazil and was in her mid-forties. She worked in a rape crisis center in Arizona, and even though she knew of Cullen house she wasn't intimately related to them. She made me feel at ease allowing me not to hold back with her, which is why I started to see her ever Wednesday.

I was true to my word and started looking into what Arizona State University had to offer. We scheduled a tour of the campus in January. I put the problem of paying for it all in the back of my head and kept telling myself, if there is a will...there's a way. The first thing that interested me was their social science program. The thought of one day becoming a counselor myself and helping women who come through Cullen Home was intriguing to me. I felt as if though I wanted a chance to give back and do something good with my life. Rosalie always desired to be a mid-wife and was looking into their advanced woman's health program.

Everyone enjoyed having Dakota around the few days he was here. Emily was beside her self with sadness when she gave him to the adoptive parents. She spent the whole night on the phone with Jacob. My heart ached for her. The house turned somber and depressed because we knew Emily would be making her trip home soon also. Rosalie, Alice, Victoria, Emily and I spent a lot of time together. We watched movies, talked and made plans for our future, just because she was leaving didn't mean we would never see her. We'd had never dealt with one of us leaving. The others all planned to stay here in Phoenix.

When Emily went back to Oklahoma, the rest of us were so heartbroken. We promised to stay in contact. We also told her we loved her and that she would always be our sorella…our though Alice was do to have her baby within the month, she was full of energy and tried to keep us in good spirits. Even though I missed my close friends Lauren and Angela; as far as they knew I was in Dartmouth, I didn't miss Forks. Being away from home for the first Christmas was going to be hard, I missed my dad the most. The everyday interactions with him, and telling him about my day. The only people who knew where I really was, were my dad, Renee, and Jacob. My checks-up were going well and Edward and I had another appointment to see the pediatric cardiologist later this month. Life in general was going well. Alice was in the middle of her nesting phase. When she wasn't directing the decorating of her and Jasper's apartment. She was here wiping the water rings off the coffee table. She did everybody laundry despite our protests. Esme just said to let her have it, if it makes her feel better.

Victoria made honor roll this semester. We were all so very proud of her. She made friends and was enjoying hanging out with people her age and being a kid again. She agreed to let Stephanie look at some of the stories we made together. She had a way with words and was so expressive with them.

Rosalie and Emmett's relationship was going well. He brought her flowers and wrote her little love notes through texts. I loved seeing her so happy. She apologized profusely for attacking Jacob. Everyone understood, it was a natural reaction. Strange boy on bed, I was crying what conclusion would you come up had started decorating for Christmas. Edward was in charge of getting all the decorations out of the shed. He was separating the lights when I walked in. Curiosity about Tanya was gnawing at me. I decided now would be a good time what is between them to.

"Those lights are pretty tangled huh, mind if I help you?"

"I would love some help baby, thank you

We spent the better part of thirty minutes separating them by color; I didn't know how to approach the subject. I didn't want to seem like a nag. He was my boyfriend and didn't I have a right to inquire about his previous partners and relationships. He knew everything about me.

"So um… I was wondering if I could ask you about Tanya."

"Yeah, I'll tell you what ever you want"

"Did you have a relationship with her?"

"Define relationship."

"Like what you and I have"

"What I have with you is love. I have never been in love before, never a connection with anyone else. Tanya and I grew up together. Her mom stayed here throughout college and while they got on their feet. She was the only girl around my age that I was comfortable with. She was a bit older. She was the one who taught me things when I was a teen. We never had sex ever, but we did experiment. My father taught me that sex was special and suppose to be enjoyed with the one person you see yourself with the rest of your life. I believe in that… so Bella as embarrassing as it is to admit, since I have never been in love before, it also means I have never had sex before."

"You're a Virgin Edward?" I gasp

"Oral sex had been my only experience, but technically I have never made love with a woman"

"Does it bother your that I am not a virgin?"

"Bella, even though you are pregnant, in my eyes you still are, it was taken from you. To lose your virginity means it's a gift given willingly with your heart as well as your body. The first time needs to be special and when we are ready; I will do everything to make it special for both of us.I swallowed loudly

"So you're telling me you want to have sex with me?"

Edward leans over brushes his fingers across my face his lips embrace mine. It starts slow and controlled. My body is flushed and my nipples hardened. I pull on his hair and opened my mouth to let him in. His other hand passes over my breast eliciting a moan into his mouth. He starts to nip at my collar and neck. Between my legs is that sensation I always have when I'm around him, but this time my hormones have sent them into overdrive. My breathing is in short pants. His matched mine.I straddle him in his lap; I can feel his hardened cock pressed against my aching center. I grind into him to try and relieve myself of this sensation. He grinds back into me in retaliation I am in pure heaven; my rabbit doesn't give me the same feeling that Edward does. I am so desperate to cum. We are a blur of hands, tongues, and lips. I am so lost to this feeling.

"Damn Rosalie, when you invited me over to watch a movie, you didn't say it was a live show"

I turned to see Rosalie slap Emmett in the back of the head.I slid off Edwards lap and back onto the couch. I was so embarrassed. I was already so flushed by the make-out session with Edward that you would never notice, all I could do is put my head in my hands

."Baby, what was that for" cried Emmett

"Think about it Em" scoffed Rosalie.

Edward leaned over and whispered in my ear " so does that answer your question?"

Note to self: no more making out in the living room.

~*~Our checkup at the cardiologist went well. She was stable and thriving. The latest ultrasound estimated that she was gaining more weight. The heart muscle had shown no more damage, it was the same as before.

I would have to back in cravings were particular now. You could find me and Alice late at night eating turkey sandwiches with potato chips… mine salt and vinegar flavored, Alice preferred ranch flavored. One late night we were watching the movie "she's having a baby" you know the one with Elizabeth McGovern and Kevin Bacon. We got to the part where Kevin Bacon's character Jake was laying in the hospital bed practicing his breathing while the nurses watched him on camera laughing, when Alice turned to me."Bella, have you decided on names yet"

"That's Edward's call, not mine"

"Well you guys are a couple and isn't this something that couples decide together"

"Did you consult jazz before you decided to name your daughter?

"He knew even before I had sex with him, what I wanted to name my children, how many I wanted. I found it very important to let him know up front, that I wasn't willing to be with someone who couldn't envision my plan, okay so I admit some plans you can't make, fate throws us curve balls but my children names have been in my head since pre-school"

"And jasper agreed to the name?"

"Bella, who in their right mind would argue with a hormonal and very pregnant woman, Jasper doesn't have a death wish"

"Jasper must love you, because I would have killed your hyper controlling ass by now"

"aw Bella, you love me"

"Of course I do Ali"

Emmett and Jasper were regulars at our dinner on Sundays now. We would all sit and talk. The guys would discuss sports and Esme and the rest of us would chat about what we had coming in the week ahead. Tonight's dinner seemed fancier then usual. There was formal china on the table and candles lit. I raised my brow in question to Edward but he feigned indifference. I knew when Edward was holding something back because he would purposely look everywhere but at you. The threads on his shirt would become a little more interesting when he was up to something.

I had forgotten my suspicions by the time dessert came around and was in love with a slice of pecan pie. I heard the tapping of the wine glass. I looked to see Emmett stand up.

I heard Rosalie Mutter "oh shit", as he bent down and got on one knee.

"Rose, I know we haven't been together long, but the moment I saw you, you had my heart. Your are my best friend and the love of my life. Will you please do me the great honor of being my wife and the mother of my children?"

Alice and I started to tear up… Ugh! Those fucking hormones.

"Emmett, you have seen me at my most vulnerable and with my sisters helped me threw the hardest time of my life. I would be so blessed to call you my husband"

"So is that a yes?"

We couldn't help but laugh at him.

"That's a yes, monkey man"

"We need to get out of the house for awhile, you want to Bella?"

'Okay, where do you want to go Edward?

"I was thinking maybe I could take you out to lunch and we can do some more shopping for the baby, start buying Christmas. I mean only if you're up to it"

"Yes, I would love that"We had tacos for lunch and while we were looking at bedding for her crib I decided to see what his ideas on what he wanted to name her

."Edward, have you given any idea on what you may like to name her"

"I've thought about it from time to time, but I was hoping to maybe sit down with you and go over any ideas you have"

"The decision really ought to be up to you; maybe you and Esme can come up with something"

"Bella, things will work out and despite our uncertain future, I would like to do this with you please"

"Okay, we can do that anytime you're ready"We picked up a beautiful pink and green floral set. It reminded me of being at the pond and the flowers outside. I knew it was expensive but I wasn't going to tell him it was too much to spend on his daughter. I was getting bigger and we also got me some maternity clothes

.It was late afternoon when I started to get tired. He caught me yawning and put his arms around my waist.

"I think its time to get my girls home" Edward said leaning over and kissing my head

"Yea, I think we're pretty tired.

When we got home, Jane's red BMW was in the drive, since she was the adoption lawyer for Cullen house and a close family friend, she was here regularly. I could hear Esme talking to Jane, I couldn't decipher the words but I could tells the tones were not friendly.

Esme heard us when we walked in and stepped out of her office. Her face was saddened and her eyes swollen and red. She looked to be very upset. My immediate thought was that something happened to Alice

."Esme has something happen to Alice or the others, what wrong "I say in a slightly panicked tone

"Edward, Bella please come into my office, Jane and I want to talk to you".We walk in and sit on the couch together, Edward sensing my nervousness grabs my hand ,lacing our fingers together and starts to rub the backside with his thumbs, it is calming to me. it's a silent reassurance that Edward is with me no matter pulls out the folder that has Edward's adoption papers in it and lays them on the table.

"I want to be up front with you two about the process of Edward's application , We ran into a problem. James Newton's mother Michelle Newton has filed a motion to block your adoption of the baby. There is a hearing in Forks, Washington in a week. We are going to have to go there"" How is this possible Jane?, We haven't heard a word out of these people and now they want to take my Daughter from me. They don't want her, they want to hurt Bella. I don't care how you do it, but you can not let this happen!" Edward 's voice carried throughout the houseI had never heard Edward enraged like this before. His grip on my hand got tighter to the point it was causing me discomfort. He turned over to me and grabbed me in a tight hug. I could feel his lips close to my ear and his breath on my neck. I heard him sniffle and I started to cry too.

" Bella, they wont take her from us, They wont hurt you again. I promise you no one is going to take my family from me" Edward sobbed on my shoulder" Bella, Ive called Charlie and let him know already. Ive asked Dr. Hawkins to cover for you Edward in case Alice goes into labor, while you two are gone, Ive booked your plane to leave in the morning. Charlie will meet be there to meet you at the airport in Seattle "~*~Edward and I didn't speak during the flight. We held hands, both silently reassuring that things will work out for us. I was drained and numb. I wasn't ready to face the people of picked us up from the airport . I could see the worry in his face as much as he tried to hide it behind his smile.

" Hey Bella" he say as he pulls me in for a tight hug. I missed my daddy. When I was growing up he was the one who took all the pain away, kissed my boo-boo's. I didn't let myself feel anything but his arms around me. I clung to him like I was 5 years old again. I just wanted this to all go away." Hey Daddy, I miss you so much"

" Missed you too"

" Edward, how was your trip"

" Charlie, It's been stressful for the both of us, I've been wanting to come see where Bella was from for awhile now, but I wish it wasn't under these circumstances"

" I've been missing her like crazy and home just isn't the same without her, but I didn't want this for either of you"

The house was the same as when I left, but it wasn't home to me anymore. My home was in Arizona, with Edward, Esme and my sisters. Edward wanted to see my room. It hadn't changed at all, my academic awards were still on the wall, pictures of Lauren and Angela. The stuffed bunny rabbit my dad gave me when I was 9. I was exhausted and went to lay down on my comfortable queen bed. Edward laid our bags down and looked around my my room for a few minutes.

" I know your tired Bella, but I need to check on the baby, I hadn't done it since we left this morning."

I rolled over and lifted my shirt and I watched as placed the staps on. Her heart was strong and it was a good sound to us. It stayed in normal knocked on the door and he came in with a tray" Sue knew that you were coming home today so she stopped by and made dinner for everyone."

" Thanks Dad"

" Is that the baby's heartbeat on that machine?"

" Yea, we have to monitor her every so often to make sure she isn't having periods of deceleration of the heart. That could mean she is in distress"

" What would happen if the baby were to go in distress" Charlie asked curiously

" Worse case scenario is she will have to be born" Edward replied

Charlie walked over too me put his hand on my belly and he felt her move around his fingers. " Hang in there kiddo" he said to know one in particular and he walked out the was then that I knew my dad had also fell in love with his granddaughter.

The next few days were the same. I decided to cook, but I would have Charlie or Edward go to the grocery store for what I needed. I didn't want to leave the house and be faced with ridicule and small town gossip. I damn sure didn't want to run into any one with the last name Newton. Charlie already had a run in with Michelle. She made a comment that she heard that I and her grandchild were in town and that she wanted to stop by, Charlie in the nicest way possible said that he shoots tresspassers.

The day before the hearing Edward was so full of emotions. I was so numb that I didn't know what to feel. I walked in and caught him staring at a newborn picture of me when I was in Charlie's arm. I had lots of brown hair and chubby cheeks. I sat on the couch next to him, laid my head on his shoulder looking at the picture also" My Mother has a picture of me with my Father just like this, You can see such pride in his face while holding me, I remember thinking one day I was going to have a picture just like this when I finally became a dad and now someone wants to take that away from me and I wont let that happen, I wont let anyone or anything come between my family" Edward said choking back tears"

I love you Edward and I know you will do anything you can to make sure she stays with us"

The day of the hearing I was running a bit behind schedule, taking a shower and dressing myself seemed to take a lot out of me. We had to check her heart then we were finally able to leave. Charlie had to go to the station to sign off on some paperwork but promised he wouldn't be too late. Our town was small so the drive was less then ten minutes. I was so nervous. I had hidden all these emotions and tried to be braveWhen we got inside the tension in the air was electrified. I just felt like something was going to happen.I seen a women sitting on the bench by the court room doors. Edward's shoes made a sound on the shinny waxed floor as we walked making the woman's head move

The moment I locked eyes with her I felt my body start to shake with fury.

I wasn't prepared to see her. I could have lived the rest of my life never seeing that bitch and here she was less twenty feet from me.

I felt Edward trying to pull me forward to keep walking.

I couldn't move.

I couldn't do anything but look at her.

" Bella come on, we are going to be late, Is something wrong"?

" Its her... It's Renee" i said in a raspy whisper.

I looked up to see the fury and rage in Edward eyes" Where is she?, cause this shit ends NOW!"

EPOV

I have never in my life been so compelled to hit a woman in my life until I stood in front of Renee Swan. I had no doubt had my mother been here she would be as my she would say "sucking soup" by now

." You have some damn nerve showing up here after the shit you have done to Bella!"

" who are you exactly?'" I'm Edward Cullen, Bella's boyfriend and I suggest you leave. You have no right to be here, this is a family matter"

" Oh that Doctor at the place that Bella is shacked up in." She looks past me and looks at Bella " Good job, managed to snag you a rich Doctor and even conned him into adopting your bastard spawn"

" You are so fucking lucking my mother raised me to be a fucking gentleman and to never hit a lady, even though the term lady is a very loose description of what the fuck you are!"

I got real close to her face, our noses were almost touching.

" but if you fuck with my family and cause that wonderful woman over there to shed another tear because of your bullshit, I will kill you myself!" I said in the most menacing tone I could conjure. There was fear in Renee's eyes

" Renee you need to leave now!" Charlie said walking up behind me

" I can't leave Charlie" Renee replied in a now softer tone

" Why the hell not, this is has nothing to do with you!"

" Michelle and I are here to make sure our rights as grandmother's are preserved "

An: Thank you to everyone for your reviews

It means so much to me. I know some of you have expressed concern

About a new girl coming to Cullen House. CH is an active home that sees women come and go. The story is ultimately about Bella and her experiences. Anyone new that comes along will not interfere with the relationships that she has formed with these 4 other women, so expect characters to arrive, they will have a background roles.

Special thanks goes out to : **One of Eddies girls **for her awesome help as a pr in parts of this chapter. I look forward to working with her for the next chapter in full.

* special note* any legal mentions are for fan fiction and do not represent actual laws


	17. Chapter 17 Strength

Chapter 17

Strength

EPOV

Charlie pulled me back from Renee, just in time for Jane to show up. She wasn't worth going to jail for and I wasn't going to cause her any reason to prove that I was unfit to raise my family. I worried about what being here would do to Bella, it was mine and Charlie's job to keep this situation as stress-free for Bella as possible. These people didn't want to do anything but hurt her, so held on to my love to calm her crying.

"Edward, the judge is ready for us," Jane said as she tapped on my shoulder.

I put my hands on both sides of Bella's cheeks and wiped her tears with the pads of my thumbs,  
" c'mon baby, let's get this over with."  
We were seeing family court judge, Jackson Sullivan... Charlie said he was a good fair person, an active father's advocate and was familiar with adoption

My stomach was in knots, I tried real hard not to show an ounce of worry. I didn't want Bella to stress anymore then I knew she was already, holding her tiny hands in mine, reminded me that we were in this together. We would do anything to make sure that our daughter stays with us.

"I wanted to let the parties involved that we are going to treat this case more like a mediation and less of an official hearing. I want to know the personal side of things, cause if we discussed things on a legal stand point, this would be a cut and dry situation. I have read this file thoroughly and it saddens me that things have gotten this far, so I will ask you Mrs. Newton, why is it important to you that you have access to this child, giving what has transpired the last 6 months?"

"Your Honor, that child is a part of my family, the only thing left of my son. Despite the horrible things he was accused of, I loved him dearly. I just think that the baby needs be with its own family, that really want it and care about it."

laws in the state of Washington Judge Sullivan was an adoptive parent himself with five of his own. Charlie didn't know him personally, but been to a party of two Renee dragged him to at the country club.

We all rose when the judge entered, we were all sworn in and ready to proceed.

I could feel my own blood start to boil, I knew that what mattered in a family wasn't necessarily whose blood ran in your body but the love and dedication in the parent.

" Dr. Cullen, I would like to hear your take on things as well" Th judge ordered

"Yes your honor. I believe there is more to family then the blood that runs in our veins, This baby and her mother are everything to me. I love them more then my own life. Bella came to Cullen House scared and feeling abandoned by her family. She has made so much progress, even had the courage to talk about her assault and seek therapy. Bella has bonded with four other women who couldn't be more of a sister to her even if they were by birth. My mother who runs the program sees her as one of her own and the feeling is mutual with Bella also. I've watched her relationship with her father blossom. We are a family. _We are her family_. This child is special and precious, and when the news of my daughter's condition was discovered we were all there for each other. I've always wanted to be a father and Bella knows me more then anyone and she has chosen me to make sure that this baby is happy and healthy."

"Mrs. Newton, while this court is sorry for your loss, I can't ignore the fact that this child was created as a result of an sexual assault and as of right now your husband is accused of murdering your son. Miss Swan is handling this situation the best she can and that's commendable. Its also states in this file that this child has a heart defect are you aware of this?"

"No Sir, I'm not"

"Mrs. Newton, are you aware also that your character witness Mrs. Swan, Isabella's Mother wrote a letter to her and the contents of the letter were the most dreadful, awful things a mother could say to her child and that she was arrested by her very own husband regarding this letter?"

"Yes sir, I knew she was arrested but I didn't know the exact reason why. Renee told me that Isabella was giving this child up for adoption to complete strangers and didn't care about the baby. I wanted the baby to at least be with its blood relatives. I didn't think that maybe this would hurt her and I certainly don't want to cause her anymore pain then what my family has already done."

"Mrs. Newton there just isn't a case here and you know it. Washington state has no grandparent laws on the books and the adoption itself is within its rights to go through. If your truly want to be in this child's life may I suggest start a line a communication after the child is born with Dr. Cullen, but please understand it will be his choice, cause he will have full physical custody of this child. According to their signed affidavits Miss Swan and her father trust Dr. Cullen and has already established the best care possible for the baby's illness. In my opinion, Mrs. Newton, if you have any hope to have a relationship with this child may I suggest you evaluate who you associate with. This court finds no reason to block Dr. Cullen's  
application to adopt Baby Swan."

The Judge banged his gavel dismissing everyone

I watched as Mrs. Newton was speaking with Renee, the facial expressions were intense as I imagined that the conversation wasn't a pleasant one for her. Renee walked out of court and never once looked at Bella or Charlie.

Bella and I hugged, there wasn't anything else to keep me from my family, this was the best Christmas present I could've hoped for.

"Dr. Cullen, Isabella is it possible to have a word with you?" Mrs. Newton asked.

I looked at Bella for her to give me a hint of apprehension, if she would've, I wouldn't have even entertained the idea of this conversation. She gave me none and felt that it was the right thing to get it over with.

"Sure Mrs. Newton, what can I do for you?" I asked with confusion

"I wanted to tell you Isabella that I am so sorry for the hurt that my family has caused. I know nothing I say could make it any better. I assume the heart defect the judge is talking about comes from my side of the family. I will fax over our medical history to Cullen House as soon as possible"

"I appreciate that thank you and Michelle what your son did to me and the others was the most horrible thing you could ever imagine, but he was the monster and your not to blame for his actions. He was an adult, he made those choices and in the end died because of it. There is a special place in hell for him" Bella replied.

"I respect your feelings Isabella and I really want to be in this child's life in some capacity," Michelle pleaded.

"The most we are going to offer is pictures and notes to tell you how she is, but I cant allow direct contact with my daughter or Bella, they are my life and I wont see them hurt I wont confuse my daughter as far as she is concerned I am her only father and Esme is her only grandmother."

"Thank you Dr. Cullen, I respect you wishes." Mrs. Newton said appreciatively

Walking out of the courthouse we were met by Charlie. He gave us both a hug and said he would meet us back at the house after his shift was over.

I turned to Bella and gave her a passionate kiss, it held promise and a future of our forever. My heart wanted more than anything to grow old and gray with her

"Edward, would you mind taking me somewhere? Bella asked with determination in he voice

"I would do anything you asked Bella," I replied curiously

We drove for 15 minutes on an isolated paved road, passed a sign that said La Push, Bella didn't say much other then to tell me when to turn. Her mood was somber and withdrawn. She told me to park near a place she called the cliffs and asked if I would wait in the car. I watched Bella walk to the edge of the trees, her fist closed tight.

I could tell she was crying, I walked behind Bella and put my arms around her. I could feel her body relax against mine and we joined our hands on her belly feeling our daughter move within her.

" Bella, is this where it happened?"

" Yes."

" Baby, maybe we shouldn't be here, I don't like seeing you so upset."

" Edward, I need to do this. I need to move on, put the demons past me."

I held her while she cried and screamed, I wouldn't let go.

After a while she turned to me and kissed me, "I'm ready to go home" Bella said with exhaustion

" Yeah, I'm pretty sure Charlie is worried about where we are"

" Edward, Forks isn't my home anymore. Take me home... to Phoenix."

I was taking my family home.

Charlie was home by the time we got to his house. Bella was worn out, it had been a trying day for all of us.

I carried Bella's sleeping body in the house, Charlie looked frantic with worry. I took her upstairs and laid her in the bed and met Charlie down stairs.

"I was worried about you guys when I got here and didn't see your car, the neighbor said you hadn't been back here since this morning, I thought maybe Bella had left without telling me, then i started to think maybe something happened with the baby. When I called Sue, she said your car was spotted near the cliffs, so I assumed Bella needed to go and work through things."

"Yeah, she asked me to take her, it needed to be done, I guess this was her way of letting it go. I will say that she doesn't want to come back to Forks, it holds too many awful memories for her, so I guess your going to have to cash in those Frequent flyer miles every once in awhile"

"I suspected that would happen and I don't blame the girl. I was thinking of a change of scenery myself. I am set to retire in January and thought I would go to Arizona also. You know to help out with my granddaughter and be with Bella. I could use some sun"  
" I think Bella would love that ."

" I'm sure it would help your quest to keep Bella in Phoenix, if her pops was there also huh?" he chuckled

"It would help greatly" I said hopefully

"Don't mention it to Bella yet, I want to surprise her"

"My lips are sealed"

"So when is my baby girl going to leave?" Charlie said sadly

"We have a plane to catch in the morning"

We boarded the plane early the next morning, Bella and Charlie had a tearful goodbye. He let us go with a hug and a reminder to do right by his daughter or face his cabinet of weaponry. I assured him he would never even have to search for the keys when it came to me.

Bella slept for most of the flight, I woke her an hour before to make sure she ate something. This trip has been emotionally daunting to say the least, but I get to keep Bella and my daughter so it madeit all worth it.

It was late afternoon by the time we got home.

Everyone was waiting in the living room but Alice, I didn't call home to let them know what was happening, so I'm sure they were nervous.

"So tell us what happened in Spoons," Victoria said.

"It's Forks Vic," Bella laughed

"I knew it was named after a utensil, just didn't know which one"

"Well the adoption will go as planned. It was stressful and we are both glad to be home" I explained giving Bella a chaste kiss

"Where's Alice?" Bella asked Esme

"She's in her room, why don't you go see her".

"C'mon, baby, we have to get you on the monitor any way"

We knocked on Alice's room door and heard a faint voice tell us to come in  
Alice was in bed, looking exhausted and pale, Jasper was beside her in the chair holding their baby girl.

"Oooh Alice when did you have your baby?" Bella squealed.

"She came 3 days after you two left, I had to have a c-section. I was going to tell you if you called but I knew it was stressful for you already just being up there, so I waited to surprise you. Come meet Tiffany Chanel Whitlock." Alice replied tiredly

Baby Tiffany was 6 pounds 3 ounces of pure sweetness.

Bella looked like a natural holding her and I let myself imagine her holding our own daughter.

Christmas was an extra special time here in Cullen House, it had been my father's favorite holiday. My mother and I miss him everyday, this will only be our second Christmas without him.

The tree was decorated with little mementos of holiday's past. There were a small token from every resident that came threw these doors. My mother would tell us about each one while we decorated the tree. My biological mother added a heart and the inscription says "Love means letting go ."

My mother Esme had every milestone I ever accomplished on that tree from birth to medical school. I couldn't wait till I could do that with my daughter.

I got Bella a silver oval shaped ornament, decorated with two red hearts with a string attached to each other. In between the hearts an old Chinese proverb was engraved that said "An Invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet, regardless of time place or circumstances. The thread may stretch or tangle but never break." She cried when I showed her ornament for the tree and I laughed when she showed me mine…. It had a picture of a baby chicken and it said "Chick Doctor"  
Christmas morning I woke early to sneak Bella's present to the tree. She was the type to shake all the boxes with her name on it. After breakfast we all gathered around the tree Rosalie and Emmett snuggled on the couch. Alice and Jasper doting over their newborn Tiffany. That would be Bella and I next year. I looked at my mother affectingly rubbing Victoria's head in her lap. I remember when she used to do that to me. Bella sat between my legs on the chaise lounge, her body melting into mine.

This was home and she was my destiny.

**AN: I know it is short, but we donr have a cliffy. wonder what Edward got Bella for Christmas. This chapter was made beautiful and descriptive with the talented help of One of Eddies girls. She is an avid fan of dialog tags and made me see the inportance of them. Thank you so much**


	18. Chapter 18  Hourglass Love

Chapter 18

Hourglass Love

BPOV  
Going back to Forks for me was a terrifying experience. I was nervous about court. The possibility of the Newton's getting her was unfathomable to me. Edward being able to keep this baby was the blessing we all needed. There was nothing now to keep him from his daughter. I made my decision then that I could no longer come back here, this place didn't feel like my home anymore. I love my dad, but I was ready to move on.

I was apprehensive about asking Edward to take me to the cliffs. I wasn't sure if he would feel as though this would be beneficial for me or cause me added emotional stress. I just felt that it was needed, that I needed closure. I wanted to take control of my life. Edward was right, The Bella who came to Arizona was not the Bella who returned to Forks.  
Vivid images of that night flashed before me, the feral look in James eyes, before the pain as his fists collided with my body. My body started to shake in remembrance of my body being torn open and violated. I couldn't hold in the tears anymore.

Edward must have sensed that I needed him cause the feeling of overwhelming peace and safety flowed through me when we joined hands. He was the man I was undeniably in love with and his love for me was equally reflected back . I was ready to let go, let myself heal and put my past behind me.

I wanted to go home, I wanted to go back to Phoenix.

~*~

I felt so much better as soon as we landed, like a weight was lifted from my chest. I could instantly breathe easier. It was hard telling my dad goodbye again, but he promised a visit very soon. I missed everyone very much and was glad to see them. I hated that I wasn't here for Alice when she gave birth. I knew she had Jasper and she would have want for nothing. I remember Momma Esme saying one time babies come in their own time whether we are ready for them or not and baby Tiffany certainly couldn't wait till Aunt Bella came back from Washington.  
Christmas time was important here at Cullen House, it was Edward's favorite holiday. I cried when he gave me the special ornament for the tree. It was perfect. We would be tied together forever by our daughter and our love for one another.

Mrs. Newton was true to her word and had medical records faxed for Edward and the cardiologist to go through. They were sent before we returned Edward allowing her pictures periodically was very generous of him and more then what I would have done personally. He is her father and I respected his decisions.

I was still so tired when Edward woke me by pepper kissing along my neck, telling me that Santa had come by. He said I needed to see what he brought the good girls under the tree, but then he handed me a satchel of coal candy. Stating that I wasn't one of the privileged few. I knew Edward was joking, but if Santa knew of all the naughty thoughts that ran through my head of Dr. Cullen, I wouldn't have even gotten the coal.  
I was so content laying with Edward on the chaise lounge surrounded by my family. This was what I was missing in my life. A caring and loving family and by a twist of fate I received it and nothing under that tree was going to be able to compare to the gift I got months ago.  
Rosalie and Emmett surprised everyone by telling us that they decided to be married sooner rather then later and it will be on Valentines day. Alice protested saying a decent wedding cant be pulled off in that time frame. But in the end we all congratulated them.

Alice announced she would be moving in with Jasper as soon as her six weeks wereup.

I got some really awesome presents for Christmas, Esme gave me some nice earrings, Alice gave me a gift certificate for a prenatal massage, Edward thought that it would be greatly beneficial for the stress. Rosalie decided to play on my hormones and heartstrings and give me a picture of all five of us the day Emily left to go home to Oklahoma.  
We all chipped in to send Victoria to New York for the Summer to a writers camp, Stephanie recommended that she go and said it would help her hone her talents.

Edward was the last to give me his present, he was rather persistent when he asked what I wanted for Christmas. I didn't want or need anything so I said nothing . He placed the box in my lap. It was small, similar to the one Emmett had given Rosalie onThanksgiving. I cautiously pulled apart the paper reveling the powder blue box. I could feel my heart pounding through my chest , I felt dizzy, I hoped and prayed that this wasn't an engagement ring. I was no where near ready for that , my future was so uncertain.

Edward seen the apprehension in my face, moved my hands away from the box and started opening it himself. Edward pulled out the black velvet box and sat it on my lap and opened it for me. There was a platinum colored ring, the middle was shaped like a heart and two colored stones were clustered in the middle of it.

He placed a kiss on my temple, "this is a promise ring, I know it's too soon to think about getting married, but I wanted to give you something to remind you everyday that I love you. There will never another for me and I will wait as long as you need to for you to be my wife."

"Thank you Edward, it's the best present ever," my voice choking with emotion.

I didn't have a lot of money to get Edward anything nice, so I gave him something from my heart. I put the rectangular box in front of him. He looked like he was ten years old and I have given him the shiny new bike. He made quick work of the paper and took it out the box and unfolded the three connected 8x10 sized frames.

Edward couldn't hold his emotions, tears uncontrollably flowed over his beautiful face. There one the left side sat the picture he seen at Charlie's, the one where he was holding me as newborn and on the right was his father Carlisle holding him. The middle was blank, reserved for the picture of the first time he held his daughter.

Edward wiped his face, slightly embarrassed that he had cried in front of a room full of people.  
"Baby, thank you so much. This means more to me then anything in the world. I will treasure this forever"

~*~

New years brought a shift in my relationship with Edward. I felt myself wanting to be together more in a physical sense. The pregnancy hormones only added to these feelings. I knew if anyone could give me answers to my questions, it would be Rosalie.

She saw me on the couch one night after a night out with Emmett and sat beside me.

"Bella, I can tell you have something on your mind, so spill it," Rosalie said with concern

"It's embarrassing. I know that you have always been honest with me, even in times I didn't want to hear the truth"

"You can always come to me for anything" Rosalie said as she held my hand.

"The first time you had sex after your assault, what was it like? Did it hurt? Were you scared?"

"The first time I made Iove after what happened was with Emmett. I was scared, but he took his time with me. He made the experience all about me, it actually took us three times for me to be comfortable enough to go through with it. That man has some talented oral skills, remind me to tell you about that one day. Every touch and kiss was filled with love . He made it into one of the best experiences of my life. Are you thinking of taking your relationship with Edward to another level?" Rosalie asked curiously

"We have touched a bit, had some very intense make out sessions, on my birthday I let him go down on me. That was an indescribable experience. I love him with all of my heart and I know that he loves me too. I know that a part of him is cautious because of my history and I know that he doesn't want to rush me into anything but I want to feel that connection with him. It also doesn't help that every time I see him my hormones run in overdrive and I'm drowning in a pool of my own juices. The rabbit only takes the edge off" I confessed feeling my body flush with embarrassment.  
" My best piece of advice Bella is to talk to Edward, let him know what you are feeling and get his opinion" Rosalie encouraged

Rosalie and I went early one morning to take a tour of Arizona State University . I was very impressed with the psychology and social service programs. I was introduced to Mr. Wong. He would be my adviser and walk me through the financial aid, and enrollment process.

He was unfamiliar with the name of the scholarship I was awarded when I was accepted into Dartmouth, but he gave me hope when he said that some were transferable. My whole life was riding on the hope that it wasn't exclusive to Dartmouth. It would be a few weeks before I would get my answer.

Edward sat back and listened to me go on and on about ASU. He and I were hopeful this would work out . When I mentioned that I could just not go to school if the scholarship didn't pan out, he protested and said he was determined that I not be denied this opportunity

~*~  
The night before our next appointment to see the cardiologist, I found it very difficult to sleep. I was hot one moment and cold the next. The baby kept kicking when I was trying to relax. After an hour of tossing, turning, covering up, and tearing the blankets off, I decided that maybe I would go to Edwards room. He had this wonderful way of calming her with just a touch.

I lightly tip-toed down the stairs through the living room clad in only panties and a silk robe Victoria got me for Christmas. I tapped on his door and waited for him to answer. When he didn't I debated on going back to my room, I started to turn away when I heard someone moan through the door. I was curious so I opened it and saw Edward laying naked in his bed with his eyes closed, his breathing shallow. His right hand touching himself. The moans were getting louder, I felt like a pervert but I couldn't help myself. Watching him grab the base of his dick and moving it up and down his beautiful shaft. I could feel myself become wet just watching him. I never actually saw a penis before, well not one live in front of me. I wondered if they were all as perfect as Edwards. He was big and perfectly sculpted. I wanted my hands wrapped around him. I was jealous of his hands now. He picked up the pace and grabbed a little tighter then his body become ridged and he came. I heard "fuck.. Bella" come from his lips. I closed the door quickly, thinking I had been caught, I didn't want to embarrass him or think bad of me for watching him masturbate so I left and went back up to my room.

Well at least I knew the answer to my question, Edward indeed does sleep in the nude.

~*~  
I waited in my room for thirty minutes, if he saw me watching him surely he would come up here asking me. I was still hot and now hungry so I braved another trip down stairs and headed to the kitchen.  
Looking into the fridge I was indecisive, it was a toss up over ice-cream or a bowl of cereal. I was just about to pull the butter pecan ice-cream out the freezer when I felt two hands slide over my hips and around my belly. It startled me

"Edward, you can't scare me like that" I said in a harsh whisper

"I'm sorry baby, I saw you standing here in this tiny robe and couldn't help myself. I was coming to get some ice cream.

I felt my body heat up when Edward nibbled and licked my neck My head leaned over to give him access.

"Mmm, damn that feels good" I moaned.

I felt Edward slip his hand in my robe, where he proceeded to pinch my hard, sensitive nipples, with his thumb and forefinger. I had to bite my lip to keep me from being loud. He knew exactly how to play my body and he was good at it.

"Baby, how about we take this to my room?" Edward suggested grinding his erection into my back

"Mmm hmm" was my only response. The ice-cream forgotten.

I laid on the bed while Edward crawled in behind me, hovering over me

"What else are you wearing underneath that robe?" he asked huskily.

"I was hot and uncomfortable so I was laying in just panties."

"Damn, that teaches me to ask" Edward murmured adjusting himself. "Baby, you know I would never hurt you and I want us to go at a pace that you feel comfortable" there nothing but sincerity in his eyes.

"I know. I talked to Rosalie and she said that I should get your thoughts on progressing our relationship"

"Bella, I know without a shadow of a doubt that you are it for me. There will never be another woman who could hold my heart like you do, I love you. I would be lying if the thought of being inside you didn't turn me on, but I feel that with everything that has happened that maybe too soon."

"Rosalie said that it was normal for me to feel this way, since my hormones are all over the place, and if we are being honest, the rabbit isn't quite doing the job anymore. I feel so frustrated and… I have a confession to make." I said hesitantly

"Okay, whatever it is, I can handle it," his brow furrowed in confusion.

"Um... I came downstairs earlier. Before you saw me in the kitchen. Your daughter was making me uncomfortable and since she always calms down when you touch my belly, I decided to come to your room... I knocked and was going to leave when you didn't answer... but... I heard a noise so... I opened then door... and... um... saw you touching yourself," I explained shyly.

"Oh God Bella… no," he groaned.

"I'm sorry I don't what you to feel embarrassed, I felt bad for watching, but it turned me on to see you, I wanted to be the one who did that for you. I wanted to make you feel good."

"Bella, I will never deny you anything you want to do, but if we are going to be intimate, I want to take baby steps, I know your tired of me saying this but its necessary so we can gauge how you respond to me. I want our first time to be special and wonderful for both of us… I want to try something and but I want you to tell me the moment you get nervous or scared.  
"Okay." I said nervously

Edward slowly untied my robe and opens it to expose my naked torso, the cool air hardened my nipples. He slid the robe completely off of me and threw it on the floor.

"You are absolutely the most beautiful woman I've ever seen Bella"

I could feel the baby started to move again, he sat there for a moment and watched as a knee or foot shifted making my belly look crooked. Edward kissed every where that she moved and kicked while telling her to calm down and to be good to mommy, she seemed to obey and quieted down after a few minutes.

He licked and kissed all the way up between my breasts. I moaned loudly when he flicked his tongue against my nipple, they were very sensitive and I felt like i could cum from that alone.

Edward's kisses trailed upwards along my neck. "Oh my god, Edward that feels so good."

"Close your eyes, I want you to relax and just feel me" I closed my eyes.

I felt the tips of Edwards fingers lightly graze the skin along my neck, down to my legs making lazy patterns along my body. It gave me goose bumps and after awhile of this wonderful relaxing massage, I fell asleep. I couldn't remember the last time I slept so well, I woke up with Edward holding me and blankets wrapped around us both

~*~

The next day we were getting another ultrasound. She had gained more weight . She was now estimated of 6 lbs 4 oz's and thought to have a head full of hair. Her heart was still thriving and the left side appeared to be improving a bit but would still need surgery once she was strong enough to endure it.

The Doctor also informed Edward and I, that a home birth would not be possible and it was our best bet to be in a hospital just in case. I would be allowed to try and have her vaginally but was told the first sign of trouble, that I would be sent to have a C-section.

~*~

I was craving a pineapple and pepperoni pizza soEdward took me to a little pizzeria across from the doctors office. I was due next month and I thought that maybe it was time we talked about a name for her.

"I was thinking maybe we should talk about giving her a name" I said

"You know I was going to mention that to you tonight"

"I still think that maybe you should just name her yourself"

"No, I don't want to do this with out you baby". Edward said

"I would like to name her after her daddy , if I was honest"

Edward laughed "what do you suppose we name her Edwina? She will be teased, unless you have another variation that's out"

"No! Of course not," I pulled out the baby book that Alice gave me "I was thinking of naming her this" pointing out the name I like the most that matched his own.

" Hmm, it means Delight. Well she is for us, I like it but I think she should share a part of you as well so I want her to have your middle name.

"Don't you think Marie is a pretty boring name, she deserves something unique and beautiful." I stated

"I think she needs to have the name of the strongest and most beautiful woman she will ever know…. Her mother"

Well at least she has a name today…. Our lil E.

~*~  
When we got home I had a letter from Dartmouth forwarded from Forks. I went to my room to read it.  
January 15th

Dear Miss Isabella Swan,

This letter is to let you know that all scholarship recipients must notify the admissions by March 12th if they intend to attend the fall semester . There is one deferment allowed and by our records you have already use yours. Failure to get in contact with us will result in loss of scholarship. Prompt response is appreciated  
Sincerely,

Mr. Franklin Jesup  
Scholarship Liaison

I folded the letter back in the envelope  
I knew eventually the life I had in Washington and the life I have now in Arizona would combine. I could no longer live in this perfect bubble I created for myself. It was time to make some hard decisions.  
I looked up to see Edward standing in the door, "mom said you got a letter from Dartmouth today"

"Yeah, I just read it" I said avoiding his eyes

"Well what did it say?" Edward asked in a harsh tone.

"I have till March12th to make up my mind if I'm leaving or not"


	19. Chapter 19 Stupid Boy

Chapter 19 Stupid Boy

Bpov

Songs: Stupid boy: Keith Urban (EPOV)  
Bring me down: Miranda Lambert (BPOV

Edward walks over taking the letter out of my hand. I can tell he's mad. His jaw clinches tight and the grip on the paper is hard.

"You told me that ASU was going to look into a transfer" He said obviously irrititated

"Mr. Wong assured me that he would check. He told me it can take a weeks" I explained

"Why don't I believe you, you promised and you lied to me" He yelled

"Edward ! I did not Lie, I gave you my word that I would try and stay, I don't want to leave, I love you. I want to stay with my family" I pleaded

"Yeah, well actions speak louder then words, don't they?"

I watch him as flings the paper at me and it slowly lands on the floor. He punches the door on his way out.

The tears flowed uncontrollably down my body,my body violently shook. The pain that ripped through my chest was unbearable, I collapsed on the floor in a fetal position.

He wouldn't let me explain at all. I trusted him, I would never lie to him, he obviously didn't love me as much as he said, if he assumed that I would lie to him.

I heard a knock on the door but didn't acknowledge whoever was there. I couldn't move, my whole world had shattered. I felt warm hands around me, rubbing my head. Esme just held me as I broke. She stayed with me until I passed out from exhaustion. I vaguely remember her putting me on the monitor.

It was very late in the evening when I woke and walked downstairs I didn't get far before I heard the harsh whispers in Esme's office

"What the hell is your problem Edward, you come home drunk and smelling of some woman's perfume. This is not the behavior of someone who is about to become a father. I am disappointed in you. Do you realize Bella could have gone into labor early because of what you did? ….. You of all people knows what stress can do to a pregnant woman and don't get me started on how that would effect your daughter" Esme screamed at him furiously

"Mom, she lied to me. She told me she would try and stay" Edward slurred

"Edward what do you think Rosalie and Bella went to do the other day? That girl has been through hell and back and I will not allow you to jeopardize the health of my grandbaby and that of her mother" Esme said enraged "I warned you not to get involved with her, but you promised me you were mature enough to handle this situation on your own. We all knew when she came here she would be leaving for school, she sacrificed to much to not go to college, you knew this also and still pursued a relationship with her. Bella loves you and was willing to change her plans for you and her daughter and how do you show your appreciation for all that Bella is giving you… You come home piss ass drunk, smelling like a cheap whore. My suggestion is that you sleep it off and hope that tomorrow Bella forgives you"

"I love her. I didn't mean to hurt her mom, really" he said with remorse

"well I hope for your sake she forgives you" Esme said in a solemn voice

I didn't stay for the rest of the conversation. I went back to my room to think. When did my life become so complicated?

A few minutes later I was fast asleep.

~*~  
The next morning I was up before anyone else, I needed some time on my own. I was starting to get cabin fever. I showered, dressed and drove into town. I ate breakfast at a little diner called Mae's, it made the best western omelet.

It didn't take long for my phone to ring. I hit ignore. My phone rang nine more times as I ate, I switched it to silent, when the noise started grating my nerves.

I took a walk around the mall, just window shopping.

The baby items made me depressed so I decided a nice stroll around the park would help clear my mind. I found a nice shady spot, content on just watching the kids play.

My heart was still hurting pretty bad, but I sincerely didn't have any more tears left to shed.

The phone vibrated twelve times in my pocket while at the park.

I laid my head back against the bench and relaxed, trying to put the events of last night out of my head. I could sense someone standing over me blocking the sun. Slowly my eyes adjusted to see who it was.

"You're a hard woman to track Isabella"

"Mr. Newton?"

EPOV

My head hadn't hurt this bad since college, I knew better then to mix beer and liquor. I was so mad last night that I didn't give a shit. I know I should've let Bella explain, all I saw was a letter from Dartmouth and just like that I saw my whole life being taken from me.

I know maybe I am selfish for wanting her to stay and my mom was right, I knew she was going to leave when I got involved with her, it didn't make the pain situation any easier.

I love Bella with all my heart and want nothing but the best for her.

I think it would be best for her to stay here with her daughter and I. We are a family. Was it so wrong that I wanted to keep it together?

I showered and dressed and decided that I need to apologize to Bella for my behavior. I was an ass and she didn't deserve it. I was careless and added more stress onto Bella... that wasn't fair.

I knocked lightly.. Waited a few moments and knocked a little harder. Still no answer. Bella wasn't a hard sleeper and started to worry.

I opened the door... the room was empty. Bed made, her lavender body wash permeated the room.

She left.

I called her cell repeatedly and each time her voice mail answered, "Hi this is Bella, leave your name and number and I'll get back to you when I can."

I started to panic, surely she would've left a note... right?

I looked all over her room, down the stairs and on the memo board in the kitchen... nothing.

I went outside and noticed the Honda was gone. The area where we sit by the pond was empty.

I ran back inside, mom was sleepily walking over to the coffee pot and Mrs. Cope was preparing breakfast for the other girls.

"Edward, honey what's the matter, you don't look well" Mrs. Cope observed.

"He's fine Mrs. Cope, he has a hangover and a angry girlfriend to deal with today," Esme chuckled, her back still to me putting the coffee filter in the basket

"Mom, Bella's gone" I cried.

She turned around and noticed my panicked stance. "What do you mean she's gone?"

"I went upstairs to talk to her and she's not in her room. I looked everywhere for a note and didn't find one. The Honda is gone also"

"Have you called her cell? "Esme asked distressed

"Yes dozens of times, It always goes to voicemail"

"Okay. I'll call Emmett and let him know what's is going on and see if he can come over. I don't want to call the cops just yet, she may have gone to the store or simply needed to get out the house. I'm just worried cause she's three weeks from her due date and she shouldn't be alone" Mom said with concern.

I would never forgive myself if anything happens to her. Bella and my lil E are my life, I cant imagine being without them. It felt like I was slowly dying inside already, it hurt to breathe or move, to anyone it seemed like the effects of all the tequila and corona I consumed, but I knew better. This is what it feels like to love, be responsible for someone other then yourself, and not know if they were okay, hungry, or hurt.

Everyone else gathered in the kitchen and I stayed on the couch with my head in my hands, trying to conceal tears that flowed uncontrollably.

The doorbell rang and I jumped up and immediately opened the door thinking it was Emmett. It wasn't.

It was Charlie.

Shit! I'm so fucking dead, they're going to have to bury me twice.

**AN: I have to thank One of eddies girls for all her help on this story… **

**I will update soon, I don't want to leave you without answers too long, thank everyone for such overwhelming love just a reminder I post pic teasers on my FB under insert fangs here**


	20. Chapter 20 Life's Little Blessings

Chapter 20

** Life's Little Blessings**

**AN: I cried writing this chapter, but i may have been overly emotional that day, just a warning**

EPOV

Cause I want you,  
And I feel you,  
Crawling underneath my skin  
Like a hunger,  
Like a burning,  
To find a place I've never been  
Now I'm broken,  
And I'm faded,  
I'm half the man I thought I would be:  
But you can have what's left of me- **What's left of me By Nick Lachey**

"Hello Charlie, it's good to see you, " I lied.

I waved him in the door as Esme came out the kitchen visibly upset. She done her best to hide her emotions as she greeted Charlie.

"Charlie. What brings you to Phoenix?" Mom asked nervously.

"I'm in the process of moving down here, I have an appointment with a realtor tomorrow morning,"

"Does Bella know you are moving?" Mom asked.

"No. I mentioned it to Edward when they were in Washington, I wanted to surprise her. Speaking of Bella, where is she?" This was it, I couldn't lie to him now.

"Um... Charlie the thing is... Bella is" I was cut off by the slam of the front door and flashes of blonde hair and a feeling of someone's hand around my throat.

"Where is she? Where is Bella?" Rosalie screamed "If something happens to her I swear you are fucking dead man Edward!" The pressure on my throat released as Emmett pulled her off of me.

She was right, I would be a dead man if something happen to her both literally and realistically.  
"Whoa... Whoa, where is Bella? Charlie's voice was alarmed now.

"Charlie, Bella and I had a disagreement last night and this morning I went to apologize to her and she was gone. She took one of the cars and isn't answering her phone. My mother called Emmett to help look for her. I thought you were him when I answered the door."

"Bella's missing?"

"Charlie we don't know that yet," Esme responded. We sat down with Emmett and I confessed to everything concerning Bella and our disagreement. I grimaced when looking at Charlie when I got to the part where I yelled at her. The redness in his face was proof that he was angry.  
I would be to, if it was my daughter. My heart tore a new scar thinking about my daughter. Bella would never jeopardize lil E's health or her own.

Rosalie sat across from me glaring and seething with anger. I have no doubt she would tear my jugular out if Bella was harmed in any way. I would let her. I glanced at my watch, she had been gone for six agonizing hours. I looked at the door willing my beautiful Bella to walk through. I made a promise to myself that I would never doubt her again.

Emmett came into the living room snapping his cell phone shut. "I've made a call and put a BOLO out on the Honda and told them that the occupant is very close to her due date an may need medical care."  
Charlie was in pain, his face mirrored my own. The blank stare, the red rim around the eyes. He looked up at me and a lone tear had fell.

"Edward, I don't blame you. People get angry and say things I get that. Bella and my granddaughter are all I have left in this world. I can't be without them. I was just starting to feel worthy of being her father and had plans spoiling my grand-baby. I worry… worry" he choked with emotion "that I wont get to redeem myself."

"Charlie, Bella loves you. I do know you redeemed yourself a long time ago in her eyes"

Eight hours in, I couldn't take the couch anymore or Rosalie 's death glare. I needed to go to our spot, the place where I felt the spark of my love for her for the first time. I needed to sit beside the shade tree that's by the pond. I always felt closer to her there, even if she wasn't with me.  
I sat out there, feeding the ducks that Bella had lovingly named Sookie and Bill after the True Blood show she became addicted to -thanks to Emmett buying her seasons one and two for Christmas. I stayed out there resting my arms on my knees, praying, hoping that I will wake up from this nightmare. I cried, begged and pleaded for someone to grant me some kind of miracle. I just wanted her home. I heard the someone walking across the pavement, foot steps coming closer to were I was. It was probably my mother, checking on me or Rosalie coming for another swipe at my head. I didn't care. I didn't have anymore fight left in me.

"Edward!" I heard Rosalie scream. She came running to me holding her cell phone

"Yeah? What's wrong?" I worriedly asked her.

"It's Bella!"  
BPOV

It wouldn't matter why we're apart,  
Lonely minds or two stubborn hearts  
Nothing short of God above  
Could turn me away from your love  
I need you that much - **No place that far by Sara Evans**

Mr. Newton?

"May I sit with you Isabella?" Mr. Newton asked warily. I looked around, there were people close by and if I needed to I could scream if I was in trouble. I also still had my hands on my cell phone. I gestured to the seat next to me. I felt safe. It wasn't like I am in a dark ally somewhere. We were in public and I was curious to what he wanted and why he was trying to find me.

You know curiosity killed the cat, right?

"I want to tell you Isabella that I am so sorry for what my son did to you and all those other girls. Michelle and I didn't raise James to be this monster, I don't know what happen to him along the way"

"Mr. Newton, what James did changed who I was, my life was impacted not just by what happened but what resulted from it" I lovingly patted my belly "It took my last trip to Washington to come to terms with what happened. I will never forget and my daughter will forever be proof of that, but now I have to focus on what I do have. I have a father who has learned to show me unconditional love. sisters who have my back through thick and thin. A woman who loves me more then my real mother could ever hope for and I know the true love of a wonderful man, who I hope to share my life with. We are a family and while I wish those events didn't bring me here, they did and I accept my fate and it brought me here. I do not blame your family. It was James' fault not yours. There's a special place in hell for him." I took a breath from my rant and prepared myself to ask the one question that had been on my mind since James' death.

"Why did you kill James?" I asked nervously.

He sighed and looked away, "I heard Renee tell Michelle that you were pregnant and that Charlie and her had sent you away, everyone in town thought you were away at school. The day Michael brought me the box. I was so fucking disgusted. Then it all made sense as to why Jacob Black had beat him."

"Yeah. Jacob was the one who helped me after the rape."

"I suspected that much, after I heard Jacob said it had something to do with you at the police station. I was ashamed and I needed to give you a chance at a real life. I knew if James survived he wouldn't give you a moments peace, especially with you carrying his baby. I owed you for the pain you went through and I felt if he lived, he would do it again and I couldn't allow it to happen," Mr. Newton voiced was tight and laced with emotion.

Maybe it was odd but I felt like I needed to comfort him. So I leaned over and hugged him and whispered, "Thank you."

We sat there silent for awhile looking at the kids playing. I watched as a man that looked like Edward pushed his daughter on the swings and his wife came up behind him, encircled his waist and kiss his cheek. I wanted that so much. I know Edward and I we have to do some talking and that deep down he knows I love him and would never willingly want to leave him.

"Isabella, I wanted to do something for you and I hope you will accept this. I know how much school was important to you. You're a smart girl and I know you can do great things if you were given the chance." Mr. Newton pulled out an envelope and handed it to me, "I have set up an account in your name and I want you to use the money to attend what ever school you choose and to give my grandchild a wonderful life. I don't want you to make any choice you wouldn't normally make because of money," he said with a warm smile.

I accepted the envelope, it was what I needed right now. I wouldn't have to wait to hear from some scholarship. "I don't know what to say, I'm thankful. You have no idea what this means to me right now," I responded with tears brimming to the surface.

"You don't have to say anything, now I suspect the police will be here soon and I don't want you to be caught up in this, so I'm going to ask you to leave, I know that man you love is desperately worried about you judging from how many times that phone has vibrated in your pocket."

"I am, Mr. Newton take care of yourself and if there is anything I can do, please let me know."I said with as much sincerity as i could put into my voice

"Just do something positive with you life and give me a healthy grand-baby," he said sadly.

I grabbed my things and walked towards the car and looked at Mr. Newton one more time. He was focused on seeing the children play. I got into the car and rushed to the bank to get a cashier's check made out to ASU.

I paid my tuition for the year and made my way to Mr. Wong's office. "Miss Swan, I was just in the process of giving you a call, I heard back from the Spencer foundation that awarded your scholarship, I'm sorry but it's exclusive to Dartmouth only. I am hopeful that we will be able to secure other aide for you," Mr. Wong said apologetically.

"That wont be necessary Mr. Wong. I recently found a very generous benefactor and I just came to give you me receipt. My tuition has been paid for the year."

"I am so excited that you will be joining us this year, I have no doubt that ASU will be lucky to have you."

I looked at my watch…. Damn I had been gone for a long time, I started to feel guilty, Edward would be worried about me. He may be angry with me but I knew he loved me and it must be driving him crazy that he doesn't have a clue where I am at. Running off for this long was a bad thing to thing to do. I walked towards the car and noticed a slight ache in my back. I must have sat at the park to long. I'm sure it will feel better once I got home.

The pain in my back was getting worse, that sitting up was becoming harder and harder to do. Add to that the fact that I was being tailgated by some douche in a Hummer, I was still over then miles from home, and I was stuck in very heavy five o'clock Friday traffic.

I saw an exit coming up and thought that maybe taking the back roads would get me home faster then the highway would. I picked up the cell to call Edward and Esme to let them know that I would be home. The phone rang twice and I heard Rosalie sniffling like she was upset before saying hello.

"Rosalie?"

"Where the hell have you been Bella? Everyone here has been frantic, Edward is out of his mind with worry, Charlie and Emmett have pooled people from the police station to look for you."

The pain in my back started to radiate towards the front of my abdomen and I couldn't keep in the painful moan from coming out, it was apparently loud enough for Rosalie to hear over the phone.

"Bella, what's wrong are you in pain, where are you?" Rosalie asked in a paniced tone

"Um, I'm on Lotus, I'm only four miles out. I'll be home soon" I explained in a raspy voice.

"No! Bella, pull over I will come and get you." The pain was getting stronger and closer together. I couldn't drive anymore. I pulled over on the shoulder near a field of wild flowers.

"Rose, it hurts so bad, I cant drive anymore…I... I... shit… I pulled over."

"Stay on the phone with me Bella.

The pain was unbearable, I felt like my back would snap in two. "Okay," I said weakly.

"Edward!" I heard Rosalie shout, "Its Bella!"

The rustling of the phone being passed was all I heard as another contraction came over me, "Oh My God! This shit hurts!"

"Bella, sweetheart what's wrong?" Edward asked concerned, his voice calmed me.

"Edward"….. Fucking hell this hurts "I think I'm in labor, baby I'm so sorry for leaving. I just wanted to think for a bit, I didn't mean to be gone so long," I rushed to say in between contractions.

"Don't worry about it right now, all that matters is making sure that you and Lil E are okay. I love you baby so much. We are almost there, the ambulance should be there soon baby, it's going to be okay," Edward frantically rambled.

I was so scared all I wanted was Edward to wrap his arms around me. This is not how I expected to have my daughter. I wanted to be with Edward, safe and in a hospital, not on the side of the road in a fucking Honda.

"Edward," I sobbed. "I am so scared. I need you."

"Baby, I'm almost there I can see the car now." I felt wetness seep through my pants and down my legs. It started to flow and pool down to my feet, on to the floor board I was in the middle of an contractions when the door flew open. Edward put his arms around me. "I'm here baby, I have you," Edward sighed in to my shoulder.

I could hear the sirens get closer as Rosalie jumped in the passenger side and held my hand.

"I t hurts so…. Bad" I grunted

"I know it does Bella, the ambulance just pulled up, just breathe through the contraction," Rosalie encouraged.

I could hear Edward talking to one of the paramedics. "Dr. Cullen, what do we have?"

"This is Bella Swan, eighteen year old female, first pregnancy, 37 weeks gestation. Contractions are less then two minutes apart and her membranes have ruptured, you will need to tell the hospital that Dr. Yorkie will have to be called, the baby has a heart defect. Paul, please take extra care of them, that's my girlfriend," Edward explained in a professional tone.

"Bella, I'm going to move you okay? I need to put you on the stretcher." Edward slowly picked me up bridal style, and lightly placed me down on the stretcher, while the other guys put me in the awaiting ambulance. Edward was there the entire time holding my hand. I tensed slightly embarrassed when they started to cut off my pants. "It's okay they need to do that so they can assess you," Edward reassured me.

I felt them put the IV in it seemed he was having a hard time getting on to stay in place.

"Dr. Cullen, will you please check her dilation and progress so we have something to report back. I'm sure Miss Swan would rather you do it," Paul the paramedic said.

Edward raised up my legs and with his gloved hand checked where I was at, "she's at 8 and 98% effaced and plus one station, fluid is clear, fetal heart tones are strong and stable." Edward was clearly back in professional mode.

Finally the IV was in just in time to be wheeled into the hospital. I was rolled past a crying Rosalie hugging Emmett and my father -who I was shocked to see- reach out and squeeze my hand briefly.  
By that time the pain was so horrible I promised God that I would gladly become a nun if he took the pain away. I begged for a epidural as soon as I got into the room, but nurse Ratchet decided I was too far along to get one. We hate her I decided. Edward stayed by my side and fed me ice chips and rubbed my back to help take the pressure off.

Thirty minutes after I arrived I cursed, and cried as I pushed my daughter into this world, squirming and screaming. It was a surreal moment as Edward laid her on my chest slippery and bloody. The nurses weighed her and got her vitals, she was completely healthy despite being born a tad early. Her heart didn't falter from the stress of her birth.

Edward walked over holding her in his arms, you could tell he was completely enamored with his daughter, it was the look of pure love. He then, placed her in my waiting arms. She had a head full of beautiful dark brown hair, a cherub face and chunky arms. Those extra calories paid off, I though. I was happy and content laying there with our daughter. I don't think I could be any happier then I was at that moment.

**_Eden Marie Cullen born January 9th, 2011 weighing 7 lbs 3 oz and 19 inches long_**.

**AN: A huge thankyou goes out to one of eddie's girls for magician skills... she has made me want to be a better writer an appreciate the love of dialog tags. and everyone should thank lvtwilight09 cause it was because of her we now have a birth and not a cliffy:)**

**pictures of Eden will be posted on my FB page**


	21. Chapter 21 Forever mine

_**I don't own.. We all know who does**_

_**AN: There has been a huge wait for this chapter. I want to tell you that I have been busy but the truth is I got involved in Memoirs of a Mobwife and sadly knew Cullen home was wrapping up and I was not ready to let them go. This is my first complete story and its very bitter sweet for me.**_

**EPOV**

I could not be any prouder when I held Eden for the first time. The way her tiny hand wrapped around my finger, also held my heart. She was so beautiful, just like her mother. I leaned over and kissed Bella. She was so exhausted, she didn't get to hold her for long before she dozed off.

I got to show her off to the family, mom's tears triggered my own. I placed her in her hands and she hugged her so tight. "Gosh Edward she is so precious, I love her so much."

Rosalie played with the brown curls of her hair and rubbed her index finger along her soft chubby cheeks. "Hey Eden, I'm your Aunt Rose and this is your uncle Emmett," she explained to her and of course Eden just looked at her with a blank expression.

Charlie was off to a corner, his emotions were conflicted. He 's first priority was Bella  
I took Eden from mom and brought her to him and placed her in his arms. "She looks so much like Bella did when she was born, so beautiful. How is she? Is Bella going to be okay?" he looked up at me with red rimmed eyes.

"She's going to be fine, she just exhausted." He kissed Eden on her head and handed her back to me.

Dr. Yorkie was ready to have her accessed better. I watched them put her on monitors and do an ultrasound of her chest . She was a trooper through it all.

~*~

* * *

The next day he confirmed what we already knew, her left valve needed repair. That meant Eden would not be leaving with us from the hospital. She would have to stay until her surgery and recovery was complete and depending on when she would be strong enough to handle surgery it may be weeks before we have her home. This news didn't sit well with Bella, she cried, I cried, we cried together. I just wanted to fix everything.

The hospital set the family up in a room where we could visit with Eden. We would all be able to hold her without taking the monitors off of her. There was a couch, a regular bed for Bella or myself to stay with her overnight when the time came. The day Bella was discharged we immediately went there. Bella was determined not to leave until Eden did.

After a few weeks of this Rosalie and Alice managed to get Bella to agree to take trips out of the hospital even if for only a few hours. Mom and I stayed with Eden while she was gone. We still didn't want to leave her alone.

I loved how her tiny body molded into mine, like was always meant to be here. I could feel the tension in the room grow. We never discussed what happened the night I left. My mother wants answers and more importantly so does Bella.

"You have to tell her Edward," Esme whispered to me while stroking the soft curls on Eden's tiny head. "Bella needs to be told everything about the night you left, you cant keep this from her"

"I know mom but what if she leaves me, what if she takes Eden from me?" I sobbed.

"I want to say that it will be alright and comfort you, that's the mother in me but the woman part of me wants to tell you that you made your own bed and now you have to lie in it and as for Eden I know Bella would never deny you this beautiful baby."

"I will tell Bella, its only fair," I say as I lean into my mother's embrace and watch as Eden wiggles her way closer into the crook of my arm. I can't lose them and I'll do what ever it takes.

Three hours later a sad looking Bella came back, her face was slightly red. It looked like she had been crying. I put the baby back in her plastic cradle and positioned her monitors so that they wont get tangled or come off accidentally.

"What's wrong Bella?"

"I missed Eden and I had a chat with a friend of yours."

"Who?" I asked suspiciously.

"Tanya"

My heart dropped in my chest, I should have mention that night weeks ago, but we were just so wrapped up in our daughter everything else landed on the back burner.

"Bella, we need to talk."

"Yeah. I think we do," she said as I saw another tear fall from her red swollen eyes.

We called Rosalie and Alice to be with Eden that night and we went home and sat beside our pond. Bill and Snookie missed her terribly, they don't get fed like royalty when Bella and I aren't here. We sat on the swing and rocked and rocked. The tension in the air was thick.

"I ran into Tanya at the mall. Her mother and her were buying a gift for Eden. I showed them pictures of her and then Tanya apologized for what happened the night you walked out. She must have noticed my confusion cause I know we had yet to discuss what happened. She told me you were drinking and at first she was going to try and seduce you. But she saw you were upset, and you talked about how you loved me, and our daughter. She said that there was no way she could interfere with a love like that. She admits to trying to kiss you. Tanya said that you pushed her away and told her that friends would be the only type of relationship you two would have. She told me how she got really drunk and that you drove her home. "

"I would never cheat on you. Bella, you mean too much to me"

"I know Edward. I trust you."

~*~

* * *

A month later I was torn between my duties at Cullen Home and being with my girls. Rose and Emmett had gotten married. They had a small simple wedding. It got me thinking about the way my life has changed. We knew from dealing with Eden's medical situation that life is precious and to never take it for granted. We never had to go through with the adoption. Bella instead added me as her father on the birth certificate. We shared a name and I was thinking it was about time Bella shared it with us.

Charlie found a beautiful home not far from Cullen home. It was a two bedroom cottage style. As time progressed I noticed my mom and Charlie spending a lot of time together. On the surface it was weird since their children were together and they also shared a grandchild. We had all become closer, Jasper and Emmett felt like brothers to Bella and I. Alice and Rosalie were the best sisters we could have ever asked for.

We got word not long after Eden was born that Mr. Newton was arrested and was charged in James's murder. Bella talks to him once a week and keeps him caught up on Eden's progress and sends him pictures. She is determined to help him with his case, even if he has to testify about her attack. Mr. Newton was the reason My Bella is staying and If I could help him I would.

~*~

* * *

We were told a week later that Eden was good to go for her surgery. Bella and I knew this day was coming. We stayed with Eden as much as we could, neither one of us talking about the chance that our daughter would not make it. We stayed positive. I watched as Bella played with Eden's tiny toes, rubbed her back, loving on her. She was an unbelievable mother. It just came natural to her. It was just us three sharing a moment together.

I knew the timing was right. "Bella?"

"Yeah?" she asked, as she looked up at me breaking her attention from our daughter.

"I love you, baby," I told her.

She giggled and replied that she loved me too.

I took Eden out her lap and held her in my arms.

"Hey. How did you know she wanted to go to you, she may have wanted to stay with me," Bella said with amusement.

"She told me to hold her," I replied.

"Yeah. Uh huh. Sure. What are you the baby whisperer? You deliver a couple of babies, and you automatically know what they want?"

"No, I just know what this baby wants."

"And pray tell, what does our daughter want Edward?" Bella inquired rolling her eyes.

"Eden told me that she wants you to marry her daddy." I stated with a grin on my face.

I watched as tears rolled down her face as I pulled out the ring and placed it in her hand. "Tell Eden I would love to marry her daddy."

~*~

* * *

The next day at six in the morning, Eden was rolled into the operating room. The doctors estimated the operation would take about four hours to complete. The mood was tense and thick. The waiting room was filled with our family, Alice brought in breakfast but no one touched it. Our stomach were in knots. Minutes felt like hours. I caught Charlie holding my mom's hand, Emmett's arm wrapped around her shoulders silently keeping her together. Alice and Jasper pretended to watch the television in the room. Bella and I went over the last few minutes we had with her in our heads. We cried. We kissed her and told her to be strong that we loved her very much.

It didn't seem enough for me, I wanted more hugs and kisses. I wanted to revel in the warmness and sweet baby smell that was all Eden. We prayed and held each other quietly. My thumb grazing over Bella's engagement ring. We were so distracted by Eden's surgery that no one even mentioned it. I saw my mom give me a all knowing smile, but she remained somber.

Hour three almost killed us. The nurse came in to give us an update. Eden was stable and thriving. She was a fighter like her mom.

Four and a half hours after Eden went in the operating room. Dr. Yorkie come in with his bright blue scrubs on. He looked around and smiled

" Eden done good, real good. She should be ready to take home in about a week" Dr. Yorkie said smiling

A collective sigh was heard all around the room and Bella collapsed in my arms sobbing uncontrollably in relief.

We were going to be alright

The epilogue is left.. See you in two weeks.

Thanks to one of eddies girls for helping me throughout this story:)


	22. Chapter 22 full circle

I stand on the front porch as I watch the small petite brown haired girl get out of the car. The familiar shake of anxiety wreaks havoc all over her body. She is scared, plucked from her safe haven of home and shipped on a plane to live with a group of strangers , in a new town and new people to get to know. She is barely sixteen from what her file says.

She stops just shy of the steps and looks at me, it is like I was staring at a version of myself ten years ago.

* * *

Flashback*

_Alice and Jasper married and had a son named Max along with their daughter Tiffany. She started her own maternity line and still makes silly t-shirts for the ladies here at Cullen home. Rose and Emmett had a daughter named Daisy and still have an open adoption contact with Marcus who is now nine.. My dad Charlie and Esme were married. I found humor in the fact that my now husband of eight years became my step-brother a month ago. They are both happy and that's all I could ask for. Jacob and Emily are also married. She left the tribe as soon as she was eighteen and she had been with Jacob every since. They are now engaged and she attends medical school in Washington. She is working towards her goal to become a pediatrician Victoria stayed on at Cullen home and has been like a daughter to Esme, so I guess in some wicked way she is my step-sister. She finished college and now teaches creative writing in high school._

_Last but not least My handsome husband Edward and our daughter Eden. She is a spitting image of me except she does have blonde highlights in her hair if the sun hits it just right. I thank god everyday that she is now a happy and healthy nine year old. Eden has her daddy wrapped around her finger. She just flashes her bright smile and dimples and he is putty in her hands… sucker.._

_I couldn't say anything, our three year old son Blaine Alexander is just as handsome as his father and already a charmer. He has his father's eyes and he makes it impossible to say no. I am in so much trouble_

_We were married when Eden was a year old. It took me a whole year in therapy to deal with any intimacy situations. I didn't want to be scared or frightened on my honeymoon. Edward was patient and he made our honeymoon better then I could ever imagine. He was slow and gentle. He worshiped me in every way. Their isn't any way else to describe it other then spiritual. I trusted him completely_

_Mr. Newton was sentenced to two years in prison for the death of his son. All of James's victims came to the trial and we all spoke on his behalf. He comes to visit Eden any chance he can and we stay in touch with photos and email._

_I never heard another word from my mother, rumor had it she remarried and was now living in Florida. I finally got to meet Edward's birthmother Elizabeth. We invite her and her family to birthdays and holidays. Edward enjoys seeing her from time to time. Esme even made her an honorary grandmother. Elizabeth dotes on Eden and Blaine all the time._

* * *

One of the happiest days of my life was when I graduated college.

I hear the speaker beginning his introduction

"_It is my honor that I get to say a few words about your Valedictorian , She has excelled here during her time here at ASU. She has been a delight to the staff and students alike. Her four years has brought a lot of changes here at ASU. She was fundamental in the creation of The second chance scholarship. She along with the affiliation of Cullen Home implemented Crisis and peer counseling programs that each school from Elementary stage to here at ASU regularly uses and during her free time, when she has some This extraordinary young woman lectures on the impotence of education to the local school children It is with a great pleasure that I introduce you to Mrs. Isabella Cullen_

_I walk across the stage . Speech in hand. I hear the shouts and claps of my family and above them all I hear Eden shout " Yay momma" I had to smile, cause that is so typical Eden.. Center of attention_

_I clear my throat and unfold my paper on the podium. I look up and before I begin I see Edward and he mouths " I love you". I smile_

_I used my degree in sociology to counsel the ladies here at Cullen Home. I felt like I was giving back what Esme and Edward gave to me, confidence, unconditional love and understanding. I wish I could say that after our group left Cullen home that it closed its doors, but as long as women are still sent to us, we will continue to be available to them. I am reminded everyday that my situation was different. The reality is being a young mom is stressful, there will come a time when you will give up dinner so that your child could have seconds, give your child the money you saved for something new for you cause he asked for it. Endure stupid Disney channel just to hear him laugh, cause it's the best sound in the world to your ears. Hug your muddy child in your favorite white shirt cause he asked for one. A parents love is like no other._

I hold out my hand to greet the timid young girl

" Hello Angela, My name is Bella Cullen. I say shaking her hand " Welcome to Cullen home.

The end

WOW! i am so sad to end this. i couldnt let go, which is the reason for the long wait. I want to say first that i appreciate every personal story yall shared with me. I cried right along with you. each and everyone of you ladies were in my heart as i wrote. This story is not meant to glorify teen pregnancy cause it is one of the hardest things i have ever had to face. I was lucky, my childs father been by my side from the start. My child just turned 16, the age in which i had her. i could not imagine her with a baby and i am sure my mom had the same idea. if i could give any advice it would be to always put yourself and education first. you maybe bored and see no point but if you stick it out, you wont regret it.

so i will say goodbye and hope to see yall at Memoirs of a Mobwife:)and Thank you so much for giving this a chance and your reviews meant the world to me. what is a story without readers?.. loves and Hugs *fangs/mandi*


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